Fun 'n' Masti!!!!

[tukz]

thanks tukz n divya

_____________________

Horoscope Test



If you are honest this tells the truth - it's pretty good

Write your answers on a piece of paper. No cheating !!

The answers are at the bottom of this page.

1. Write the name of a person of the opposite sex.

2. Which is your favorite color out of red, black, blue, green, yellow?

3. Your first initial?

4. Your month of birth?

5. Which color do you like more, black or white?

6. Name of a person of the same sex as yours.

7... Your favorite number?

8. Do you like Sydney or Brisbane more?

9. Do you like a lake or the ocean more?


When you're done, scroll down. (Don't cheat)

Answers

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1. You are completely in love with this person.

2. If you choose:

Red - You are alert and your life is full of love. Black - you are conservative and aggressive. Green - your soul is relaxed and you are laid back Blue - you are spontaneous and love kisses and affection from the ones you love. Yellow- you are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are down.

3. If your initial is:

A-K You have a lot of love to give in friendships in your life.

L-R You try to enjoy your life to the maximum and your love life is soon to blossom.

S-Z You like to help others and your future love life looks very good.

4. If you were born in: Jan-Mar: The year will go very well for you and you will discover that you fall in love with someone totally unexpected.

April-June: You will have a strong love relationship that will last long and the memories will last forever.

July-Sep: You will have a great year and will experience a major life-changing experience for the good.

Oct-Dec: Your love life will not be too great, but eventually you will find your soul mate.

5. If you chose..... Black: Your life will take on a different direction, it will be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change.

White: You will have a friend who completely confides in you and would do anything for you, but you may not realize it.

6. This person is your best friend.

7. This is how many close friends you have in your lifetime.

8. If you chose: Sydney : You like adventure. Brisbane : You are a laid back person.

9. If you chose:

Lake : You are loyal to your friends and your lover and are very reserved.

Ocean: You are spontaneous and like to please people
gud 1 but i knew dis or almst dis

[shubha63]

What did the spectator miss when he went to the toilet?
The entire Indian Innings.

Where do Indian batsmen perform there best?
In Advertisements.

When would Agarkar have 100 runs against his name?
When he is bowling.

What is the most proficient form of footwork displayed by Indian batsmen?
The walk back to the pavilion.

How to increase the chances of Indian batsmen playing out the entire 50 overs?
Try giving them two innings to begin with, then try three and so on.

What is the Indian version of a hat-trick?
3 runs in 3 balls

What is the height of optimism ?
Sehwag coming out to bat applying sunscreen on his face.


============ ========= ========= ====
Phone Call for Sehwag:
Indian Team Manager : "Hello"(over Phone)
Wife :"Can I talk to Sehwag, this is his wife."
Indian Team Manager:"Sorry, he is just going to bat"
Wife:"No Problem Manager, I will Hold on"
============ ========= ========= ====

DIVORCE COURT SCENE :
The Judge (J.) asks the little girl (LG):
Now that your parents are getting divorced do you want to live with your mummy?
LG - No, my mummy beats me.
J. - Well then, I guess you want to live with your daddy.
LG - No, my daddy beats me too.
J. - Well then, who do you want to live with?
LG - I want to live with the Indian Cricket team, they never beat anybody !!!


Sachin’s SON: Mummy mummy!! Dekho papa six pe six mar rahe hain

Sachin’s WIFE: Beta theek se dekho, advertisement hoga ……!!!!!!!!

[tukz]

What did the spectator miss when he went to the toilet?
The entire Indian Innings.

Where do Indian batsmen perform there best?
In Advertisements.

When would Agarkar have 100 runs against his name?
When he is bowling.

What is the most proficient form of footwork displayed by Indian batsmen?
The walk back to the pavilion.

How to increase the chances of Indian batsmen playing out the entire 50 overs?
Try giving them two innings to begin with, then try three and so on.

What is the Indian version of a hat-trick?
3 runs in 3 balls

What is the height of optimism ?
Sehwag coming out to bat applying sunscreen on his face.


============ ========= ========= ====
Phone Call for Sehwag:
Indian Team Manager : "Hello"(over Phone)
Wife :"Can I talk to Sehwag, this is his wife."
Indian Team Manager:"Sorry, he is just going to bat"
Wife:"No Problem Manager, I will Hold on"
============ ========= ========= ====

DIVORCE COURT SCENE :
The Judge (J.) asks the little girl (LG):
Now that your parents are getting divorced do you want to live with your mummy?
LG - No, my mummy beats me.
J. - Well then, I guess you want to live with your daddy.
LG - No, my daddy beats me too.
J. - Well then, who do you want to live with?
LG - I want to live with the Indian Cricket team, they never beat anybody !!!


Sachin’s SON: Mummy mummy!! Dekho papa six pe six mar rahe hain

Sachin’s WIFE: Beta theek se dekho, advertisement hoga ……!!!!!!!!
lol gud 1........

[shubha63]

10x tukz.........

[tukz]

10x tukz.........
welcum shubha

[guru_sal]

gud work shubha

[shubha63]

thanks guru
________________

One day, the father of a very wealthy family took his son on a trip to the country with the
express purpose of showing him how poor people live.
They spent a couple of days and nights on the farm of what would be considered a very poor family.
On their return from their trip, the father asked his son, "How was the trip?"
"It was great, Dad."
"Did you see how poor people live?" the father asked.
"Oh yeah," said the son.
"So, tell me, what did you learn from the trip?" asked the father.
The son answered:
"I saw that we have one dog and they had four.
We have a pool that reaches to the middle of our garden and they have a creek that has no end.
We have imported lanterns in our garden and they have the stars at night.
Our patio reaches to the front yard and they have the whole horizon.
We have a small piece of land to live on and they have fields that go beyond our sight.
We have servants who serve us, but they serve others.
We buy our food, but they grow theirs.
We have walls around our property to protect us, they have friends to protect them."
The boy's father was speechless.
Then his son added, "Thanks Dad for showing me how poor we are."
Isn't perspective a wonderful thing? Makes you wonder what would happen if we all gave thanks for everything we have, instead of worrying about what we don't have.
Appreciate every single thing you have, especially your friends!

[juhirocks!!]

work= energy/time
time=energy/work

now, work=knowledge
and time=money

so, money=energy/knowledge

now, if knowledge=0,
then money=infinity!!
then, why 2 study??

[divyaashimix]

work= energy/time
time=energy/work

now, work=knowledge
and time=money

so, money=energy/knowledge

now, if knowledge=0,
then money=infinity!!
then, why 2 study??
hey bhagguu...what an analism???????????????:D :D
2 koolll......

[tukz]

work= energy/time
time=energy/work

now, work=knowledge
and time=money

so, money=energy/knowledge

now, if knowledge=0,
then money=infinity!!
then, why 2 study??
lol gud 1......shubha gud1.....

[tukz]

work= energy/time
time=energy/work

now, work=knowledge
and time=money

so, money=energy/knowledge

now, if knowledge=0,
then money=infinity!!
then, why 2 study??
lol gud 1......shubha gud1.....

[juhirocks!!]

hey bhagguu...what an analism???????????????:D :D
2 koolll......
hey. thanx!!

[guru_sal]

gud work everyone

[shubha63]

thanks tukz

[juhirocks!!]

If Doctors start making films, then what wud b their titles???

Kabhi funsi kabhi foda

Hum blood de chuke sanam

Maine MBBS kyu kiya?

Ab tumhare hawale patient saathiyo

Hamara sthetoscope aapke paas hai

Mujhe kuch katna hai

Kaho na bukhar hai

Appendix mil gaya

Kal patient ho na ho

[guru_sal]

gud one juhi

[juhirocks!!]

gud one juhi

hey, thanx!

here's 1 more:

GALILEO-- GREAT MIND

NEWTON- GENIOUS MIND

EINSTEIN- EXTRA ORDINARY MIND

ME-...............
......................
......................
.....................
...................

MASTERMIND!!U-...............
.................
...............
................
...............

NEVERMIND:D :p

[guru_sal]

hey, thanx!

here's 1 more:

GALILEO-- GREAT MIND

NEWTON- GENIOUS MIND

EINSTEIN- EXTRA ORDINARY MIND

ME-...............
......................
......................
.....................
...................

MASTERMIND!!U-...............
.................
...............
................
...............

NEVERMIND:D :p
gr88888888 juhi

[guru_sal]

She Was Looking...

Thirty feet away,
I see a beauty.
As each time I look up,
She is looking at me.
On her lips,
A sweet smile.
Making me
Gaze at her eyes
For awhile.
The girl,
With a black outfit,
Her smile is so naive
Making me stay here,
And never leave.
Seeing her brown hair,
My heart wants to be
Close to her,
And wants to
All night long stay here.
As every time
She smiles,
I do want to go near.
But,
What can I do,
I am afraid,
Her boyfriend is there.

[tukz]

hey gr8 wrk juhi n guru

[guru_sal]

thankx bitasta

[guru_sal]

PRE-SCHOOL TEST


Pre-school children were asked the following question:

"In which direction is the bus pictured below traveling?"




Look carefully at the picture.

http://i120.photobucket.com/albums/o164/guru_saluja/new%20ones%20for%20new%20threads/CAV6SNNL.jpg
Do you know the answer?


The only possible answers are "left" and "right."








Think about it







Still don't know?







Okay, I'll tell you.








The pre-schoolers all answered " right."


When asked, "Why do you think the bus is traveling in the right direction?" they answered:


"Because you can't see the door."


Feel pretty silly now, don't you?


I know .



http://i120.photobucket.com/albums/o164/guru_saluja/new%20ones%20for%20new%20threads/CAS9A59Q.gif

[tukz]

PRE-SCHOOL TEST


Pre-school children were asked the following question:

"In which direction is the bus pictured below traveling?"




Look carefully at the picture.

http://i120.photobucket.com/albums/o164/guru_saluja/new%20ones%20for%20new%20threads/CAV6SNNL.jpg
Do you know the answer?


The only possible answers are "left" and "right."








Think about it







Still don't know?







Okay, I'll tell you.








The pre-schoolers all answered " right."


When asked, "Why do you think the bus is traveling in the right direction?" they answered:


"Because you can't see the door."


Feel pretty silly now, don't you?


I know .



http://i120.photobucket.com/albums/o164/guru_saluja/new%20ones%20for%20new%20threads/CAS9A59Q.gifwelcum.....gr8 1

[guru_sal]

welcum.....gr8 1
thankx again
and tukz check dis link
http://www.secret-loves.com/index.php?test=623475

[glamour_jiya]

Early one morning, a mother went in to wake up her son. 'Wake up, son. It's time to go to school!'
'But why, Mom? I don't want to go.'
'Give me two reasons why you don't want to go.'
'Well, the kids hate me for one, and the teachers hate me, too!'
'Oh, that's no reason not to go to school. Come on now and get ready.'
'Give me two reasons why I should go to school.'
'Well, for one, you're 52 years old. And for another, you're the Principal!

[glamour_jiya]

It’s not the fault of the student if he fails, because the year ONLY has 365' days.

Typical academic year for a student:

Sundays-52, Sundays in a year, you know Sundays are for rest.
Days left 313

Summer holidays-50 where weather is very hot and difficult to study.
Days left 263

8 hours daily sleep- 130 days GONE.
Days left 141

1 hour for daily playing- (good for health) means 15 days.
Days left 126

2 hours daily for food & other delicacies (chewing properly & swallowing)- means 30days.
Days left 96

1 hour for talking (man is a social animal)-means 15 days.
Days left 81

Exam days- per year at least 35 days.
Days left 46

Quarterly, Half yearly and festival (holidays)-40 days.
Balance 6 days.

For sickness- at least 3 days.
Remaining days=3

Movies and functions - at least 2 days.
1 day left.

That 1 day is your birthday. How can you study on that day??????!!! !!!!!!!
Balance = 0 “Then how can a student pass ??”

[glamour_jiya]

One day Raja and rani decided to send messages to each other by using Pigeon instead of mobile.

The very next day pigeon reached raja without any message.

He was angrier and called to rani.

She told stupid, “That was a missed call”.

[amit@bitspilani]

gr8 jokes jiya!!!!!

[tukz]

One day Raja and rani decided to send messages to each other by using Pigeon instead of mobile.

The very next day pigeon reached raja without any message.

He was angrier and called to rani.

She told stupid, “That was a missed call”.
gud ones jiya

[tukz]

thankx again
and tukz check dis link
http://www.secret-loves.com/index.php?test=623475
guru i know dis n am not goin 2 fill dis:D

[shubha63]

hey great work everyone

_____________________________

Friendship is not a Game to Play...
Friendship is not a game to play, It is not a word to say, It doesn't start on March and ends on May, It is tomorrow, yesterday, today and everyday.

Moon said to me to leave your friend... Moon said to me, if ur friend is not messaging u why dont you leave ur friend.I looked at moon and said does ur sky ever leave u when u dont shine.


Age appears to be best in some things...
Age appears to be best in some things. Old wood best to burn. Old books best to read. Old rice best to eat and old friends best to keep


God picked up a flower...God picked up a flower and dipped it in a DEW, lovingly touched it which turned in to u, and the he gifted to me and said, THIS FRIEND IS 4U.


True friends r like morning...True friends are like mornings, u cant have them the whole day, but u can be sure, they will be there when u wakeup tomorrow, next year and forever.

[glamour_jiya]

A young Indian man excitedly tells his mother he’s fallen in love and that he is going to get married.

He says, “Just for fun, Ma, I’m going to bring over 3 girls and you try and guess which one I’m going to marry.”
The mother agrees.
The next day, he brings three women into the house and sits them down on the couch and they chat for a while. He then says, “Okay Ma, guess which one I’m going to marry.”
She immediately replies, “The one on the right.”
“That’s amazing, Ma. You’re right. How did you Know?”
-
-

The Indian mother replies,
“I don’t like her”

[glamour_jiya]

Hey subha awsome one

TEACHER : What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
PAPPU: A teacher

9)A good friend is one who tells you to study well…

But a best friend is one who stands outside the examination room and shouts

“Abbe kuch aa raha hai ya aur chit fekuuuu…”

[guru_sal]

Hey subha awsome one

TEACHER : What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
PAPPU: A teacher

9)A good friend is one who tells you to study well…

But a best friend is one who stands outside the examination room and shouts

“Abbe kuch aa raha hai ya aur chit fekuuuu…”
gud work jiya
and shubha u too

[style_ashitia]

Hey subha awsome one

TEACHER : What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
PAPPU: A teacher

9)A good friend is one who tells you to study well…

But a best friend is one who stands outside the examination room and shouts

“Abbe kuch aa raha hai ya aur chit fekuuuu…”
hey gud one!

[divyaashimix]

hey bhaggu SHUBHA and JIYA.....both seem to be in form man.....:D :D :D :D

[style_ashitia]

hey bhaggu SHUBHA and JIYA.....both seem to be in form man.....:D :D :D :D
i aree man,.....tehy rock!

[guru_sal]

Mombati ke andar ka dhaga bola, Main jalta hoon to tu kyon pighalti hai?
Mombati boli, Jisko dil mein jagah di woh bichade ti aansoo to niklenge hi


Kasur na unka hai na mera, Hum dono hi rishton ki rasmein nibhate rahe,
Woh dosti ka ehsaas jatate rahe, Hum mohabbat ko dil mein chupate rahe


Tumhara hamara rishta to aankhon aur palkon jaisa hai, Agar palak kuch der na jhapke to aankh ro deti hai, Aur agar aankh mein kuch chala jaye to palak tadap uthti hai.


Nakaam si koshish kiya karte hain,
Hum hain ki unse pyar kiya karte hain,
Khuda ne takdir me ek tuta tara nahi likha,
Aur hum hain ki chaand ki aarzu kiya karte hain

[tukz]

gr8 wrk shubha,jiya n guru

[glamour_jiya]

Hey guru that was awsome

Bolaa dukaan-daar, ke kyaa chahiye tumhain
Jo bhii kaho ge merii dukaan per wo paoge
maine kahaa ke kutte ke khaane kaa cake hai
bolaa yahiin pe khaaoge yaa leke jaaoge

Teacher asks a Computer Student:

What are the 3 latest versions of java?

Kid answers: MarJava, MitJava, LutJava ishq mein tere dil,
kya jaan bhi naam tere kar Java o Java Java

When I call you:
1 ring means : I am missing U,
2 ring means : I like U,
3 ring means : I am thinking of U,
4 ring means : I need U,
5 ring means : Idiot phone utha.

[guru_sal]

Hey guru that was awsome

Bolaa dukaan-daar, ke kyaa chahiye tumhain
Jo bhii kaho ge merii dukaan per wo paoge
maine kahaa ke kutte ke khaane kaa cake hai
bolaa yahiin pe khaaoge yaa leke jaaoge

Teacher asks a Computer Student:

What are the 3 latest versions of java?

Kid answers: MarJava, MitJava, LutJava ishq mein tere dil,
kya jaan bhi naam tere kar Java o Java Java

When I call you:
1 ring means : I am missing U,
2 ring means : I like U,
3 ring means : I am thinking of U,
4 ring means : I need U,
5 ring means : Idiot phone utha.

thankx jiya and yrs is also gud

[glamour_jiya]

Jaanay anjanay mai agar mai nai aap ka dil dukhaya ho,
Kabhi tang kiya ho,
Badtamizi ki ho,
-
-
-
Us kai liye aap sai jo ho sakta hai karlo.
-
-
-
Hum sudharnay walon mai sai nahi hai.

[divyaashimix]

Jaanay anjanay mai agar mai nai aap ka dil dukhaya ho,
Kabhi tang kiya ho,
Badtamizi ki ho,
-
-
-
Us kai liye aap sai jo ho sakta hai karlo.
-
-
-
Hum sudharnay walon mai sai nahi hai.
hmm...well glam doll........
kool one re!!!!!:p

[glamour_jiya]

Main Niklaa Aeroplane Le Ke....
Raste Mein New York Pe...
Ik Mod Aaya .....
Main Trade Tower Tod Aaya...
Rab Jaane Kab Guzraa.... New York..........
Kab Pentagon AAya..
Main Uthey Aeroplane Fod aaya

[glamour_jiya]

Ok now there is a new version of these three monkeys

http://i83.photobucket.com/albums/j290/glamour_jiya/OLDVersion.jpg

Now this is a new version

http://i83.photobucket.com/albums/j290/glamour_jiya/NEWVersion.jpg

[glamour_jiya]

Now people can u guess after loosing the world cup what other job can our cricketers do this is what they will do.

http://i83.photobucket.com/albums/j290/glamour_jiya/SaloonMaster.jpg

http://i83.photobucket.com/albums/j290/glamour_jiya/ZaheerKhan-Gazramaster.jpg

http://i83.photobucket.com/albums/j290/glamour_jiya/YuvrajSingh-Fruitmaster.jpg

http://i83.photobucket.com/albums/j290/glamour_jiya/VirendarSehwag-Cookmaster.jpg

[glamour_jiya]

http://i83.photobucket.com/albums/j290/glamour_jiya/SachinTendulkar-Teamaster.jpg

http://i83.photobucket.com/albums/j290/glamour_jiya/RobinUthappa-Coconutmaster.jpg

http://i83.photobucket.com/albums/j290/glamour_jiya/RahulDravid-JaiSambhu.jpg

http://i83.photobucket.com/albums/j290/glamour_jiya/MahendrasinghDhoni-Circusmaster.jpg

[glamour_jiya]

http://i83.photobucket.com/albums/j290/glamour_jiya/AnilKumble-Tandoorimaster.jpg

http://i83.photobucket.com/albums/j290/glamour_jiya/AjithAgarkar-Fishmaster.jpg

[guru_sal]

gr8 work jiya

[shubha63]

cool ones jiya

[tukz]

hey gr8 wrk jiya

[guru_sal]

Lamho Lamho per Khwaab Likhoonga,
Apni zindagi per kitaab likhoonga,
Aapki gardaan (neck) to phoolon ki tehni,
Aur aapke chehre ko gulab likhoonga.


Baadal garaja magar barasaat nahi aayi,
Dil dhadaka magar aawaj nahi aayi,
Pura din gujarane ko hai dost,
Kya ek baar bhi meri yaad nahi aayi?


Unako chaha bhi to izahaar na karana aaya,
Kat gayi umar hame pyaar na karana aaya,
Unhone maanga bhi agar kuchh to judaai maangi,
Aur ham the ki hame inkaar bhi na karana aaya !!!

Aaj apne aap se khafaa hoon......
Jo uske chere ki madhoshiyaan na pad saka,
Par kya karoon uski yaad me aisa khoyaa
Ki uski muskurahat ke peeche ki shararat na pad saka.

[glamour_jiya]

Cool one guru

A young woman was taking an afternoon nap.
After she woke up, she told her husband, “i just dreamed that you gave me a pearl necklace for valentine’s day.
What do you think it means?”

“You’ll know tonight”, he said.
That evening, the man came home with a small package and gave it to his wife.
Delighted, she opened it only to find a book entitled “The meaning of dreams”.


Hi! i am marrying next week. there will be a small party and only a few people will be invited…so i am inviting you…don’t bring any gift with you…just bring someone to marry me

[guru_sal]

Cool one guru

A young woman was taking an afternoon nap.
After she woke up, she told her husband, “i just dreamed that you gave me a pearl necklace for valentine’s day.
What do you think it means?”

“You’ll know tonight”, he said.
That evening, the man came home with a small package and gave it to his wife.
Delighted, she opened it only to find a book entitled “The meaning of dreams”.


Hi! i am marrying next week. there will be a small party and only a few people will be invited…so i am inviting you…don’t bring any gift with you…just bring someone to marry me
nice one jiya

[guru_sal]

Are You Talking To Me?

"Are you talking to me?" she said passing by
"Yes, you ... you ... next to the bald-headed guy,
"I think you're real gorgeous ... that flaming red hair
Is exceedingly beautiful and really quite rare.

"I love the way that it curls round your face,
And the way that it seems your ears to embrace,
And the way that it darkens the green of your eyes,
And the way on your cheek that a loose tendril lies."

She took a deep breath as she paused in her stride,
Her lips slowly parted, her eyes opened wide,
She smiled as she whipped the wig from her head,
"If you like it so much, here, you wear it instead."

[tukz]

hey guru gr8 wrk

[guru_sal]

hey guru gr8 wrk
thankx a lot bitasta

[glamour_jiya]

A Sardarji goes to a hotel and eats heartily. After eating he goes to wash his hands but starts washing the basin instead.
The manager comes running and asks him, "Prahji, aap kya kar raheho?"
To this the man replies, "Oye, tumne hi to idhar board lagaya hai, "Wash Basin".




Sardarji went to the appliance store sale and found a bargain.
"/ I would like to buy this small TV," he told the salesman.
"/ Sorry, we don't sell to Sardars," he replied.
He hurried home removed his turban and changed his hair style, and returned
to tell the salesman
"/ I would like to buy this TV."
"/ Sorry, we don't sell to Sardars," Salesman replied.
"/ Damn, he recognised me," he thought.
He went for a complete disguise this time, haircut, new hair colour,
new outfit, big sunglasses, waited a few days, saw the salesman again.
"/ I would like to buy this TV."
"/ Sorry, we don't sell to Sardars," he replied.
Frustrated, he exclaimed, "How do you know I'm a Sardar?"
"/ Because that's a microwave," he replied.

[tukz]

A Sardarji goes to a hotel and eats heartily. After eating he goes to wash his hands but starts washing the basin instead.
The manager comes running and asks him, "Prahji, aap kya kar raheho?"
To this the man replies, "Oye, tumne hi to idhar board lagaya hai, "Wash Basin".




Sardarji went to the appliance store sale and found a bargain.
"/ I would like to buy this small TV," he told the salesman.
"/ Sorry, we don't sell to Sardars," he replied.
He hurried home removed his turban and changed his hair style, and returned
to tell the salesman
"/ I would like to buy this TV."
"/ Sorry, we don't sell to Sardars," Salesman replied.
"/ Damn, he recognised me," he thought.
He went for a complete disguise this time, haircut, new hair colour,
new outfit, big sunglasses, waited a few days, saw the salesman again.
"/ I would like to buy this TV."
"/ Sorry, we don't sell to Sardars," he replied.
Frustrated, he exclaimed, "How do you know I'm a Sardar?"
"/ Because that's a microwave," he replied.
lol gud 1 jiya....ur welcum guru

[glamour_jiya]

welcum tukz

Q: Where does Tarzan buy his clothes?
A: At a Jungle Sale!


Q: How do you keep an idiot busy for hours?
A: Give him a piece of paper with "Please turn over" written on both sides.

An idiot decides to start up a chicken farm, so he buys a hundred chickens to get up and running.
A month later he returns to the dealer to get another hundred chickens because the first lot had died.
Another month passes and he's back at the dealers for another hundred chickens, "I think I know where I'm going wrong" he tells the dealer,
"I think I'm planting them too deep."

[tukz]

welcum tukz

Q: Where does Tarzan buy his clothes?
A: At a Jungle Sale!


Q: How do you keep an idiot busy for hours?
A: Give him a piece of paper with "Please turn over" written on both sides.

An idiot decides to start up a chicken farm, so he buys a hundred chickens to get up and running.
A month later he returns to the dealer to get another hundred chickens because the first lot had died.
Another month passes and he's back at the dealers for another hundred chickens, "I think I know where I'm going wrong" he tells the dealer,
"I think I'm planting them too deep."
lol gud ones agn....

[guru_sal]

OFFICE ARITHMETIC

Smart boss + smart employee = profit

Smart boss + dumb employee = production

Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion

Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime


SHOPPING MATH

A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.


GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

A successful woman is one who can find such a man.


HAPPINESS

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.

To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.


LONGEVITY

Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.


PROPENSITY TO CHANGE

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.

[guru_sal]

Do you wanna 'see' the 'world' after your death?

If Yes, Scroll down...


http://i120.photobucket.com/albums/o164/guru_saluja/4cry1aa.gif




































DONATE YOUR EYES

[tukz]

lol gud ones guru...

[glamour_jiya]

A man was walking in the street when he heard a voice. "Stop! Stand still! If you take one more step, a brick will fall down on your head and kill you." The man stopped and a big brick fell right in front of him. The man was astonished.
He went on, and after awhile he was going to cross the road. Once again the voice shouted: "Stop! Stand still! If you take one more step a car will run over you and you will die." The man did as he was instructed, just as a car came careening around the corner, barely missing him.
"Where are you?" the man asked. "Who are you?"
"I am your guardian angel," the voice answered.
"Oh yeah?" the man asked. "And where the hell were you when I got married?"

[glamour_jiya]

With the help of a fertility specialist, a 65 year old woman has a baby. All her relatives come to visit and meet the newest member of their family. When they ask to see the baby, the 65 year old mother says, "Not yet."
A little later they ask to see the baby again. Again the mother says, "Not yet."
Finally they say, "When can we see the baby?"
And the mother says, "When the baby cries."
So they ask, "Why do we have to wait until the baby cries?"
The new mother says, "I forgot where I put it."


Santa On KBC With Santa singh…

The Story So Far…

Santa Singh has answered 12 out of the 15 questions correct and has used all his lifelines except for “50-50″ and “Phone a Friend”.

Santa Singh is playing the 13 th Question now which is for 25 Lacs. Let’s see what happens next…

Amitabh Bachchan : Apka 13th question 25 lakh ke liye, yeh raha aapke saamne aapki Computer Screen par…

Santa Singh gets Tense…

Amitabh Bachchan : Who is the father of Abhishek Bachchan? Your options are…

Amitabh Bachchan : Toh Santa Singh Jee kya Jawaab hai aapka? [He’s quite sure that Santa will opt for option A]
But Santa is surprisingly still confused…

Amitabh Bachchan : Aapke paas abhi bhi do life line baaki hai… 50-50 and phone a friend. Agar aap chahe to unhe use kar sakte hain. Wo aap hi ke liye banaayi gayee hai.

Santa Singh : I think it is A, but I’m not sure.

Amitabh Bachchan : Not sure, Hmmm… Aap kya karna chahenge?

Santa Singh : I would like to use 50-50…

Amitabh Bachchan : Ok Computer Jee, Kripya 2 galat javab mita deejiye…

Computer deletes two names, and leaves the following options:

Now Amitabh Bachchan gets confused and worriedly thinks if the Computer is actually right or has got some bug!. Santa Singh gets all the more Confused after the 50-50 Lifeline…

Santa Singh : I would like to use my last life line too - Phone A Friend…

Amitabh Bachchan : Aap kisse baat karna chahenge??

Santa Singh : Main aapki Misej [Mrs.] Jaya Bachan Ji ko phone karna chahoonga…

Amitabh Bachchan Faints !!! But the Call gets connected to Jaya Bachchan [Thanks to AirTel ]…

Santa Singh : “Jayaji, Who is the father of Abhishek Bachchan!?”

receiving reply from JAYA Santa faints..

GUESS WHY????????? ??

Scroll Down

|
|
|
|
V

|
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|
V

Jaya Bachchan ask’s him ” What are the options?”

[tukz]

A man was walking in the street when he heard a voice. "Stop! Stand still! If you take one more step, a brick will fall down on your head and kill you." The man stopped and a big brick fell right in front of him. The man was astonished.
He went on, and after awhile he was going to cross the road. Once again the voice shouted: "Stop! Stand still! If you take one more step a car will run over you and you will die." The man did as he was instructed, just as a car came careening around the corner, barely missing him.
"Where are you?" the man asked. "Who are you?"
"I am your guardian angel," the voice answered.
"Oh yeah?" the man asked. "And where the hell were you when I got married?"
lol gud 1se

[tukz]

With the help of a fertility specialist, a 65 year old woman has a baby. All her relatives come to visit and meet the newest member of their family. When they ask to see the baby, the 65 year old mother says, "Not yet."
A little later they ask to see the baby again. Again the mother says, "Not yet."
Finally they say, "When can we see the baby?"
And the mother says, "When the baby cries."
So they ask, "Why do we have to wait until the baby cries?"
The new mother says, "I forgot where I put it."


Santa On KBC With Santa singh…

The Story So Far…

Santa Singh has answered 12 out of the 15 questions correct and has used all his lifelines except for “50-50″ and “Phone a Friend”.

Santa Singh is playing the 13 th Question now which is for 25 Lacs. Let’s see what happens next…

Amitabh Bachchan : Apka 13th question 25 lakh ke liye, yeh raha aapke saamne aapki Computer Screen par…

Santa Singh gets Tense…

Amitabh Bachchan : Who is the father of Abhishek Bachchan? Your options are…

Amitabh Bachchan : Toh Santa Singh Jee kya Jawaab hai aapka? [He’s quite sure that Santa will opt for option A]
But Santa is surprisingly still confused…

Amitabh Bachchan : Aapke paas abhi bhi do life line baaki hai… 50-50 and phone a friend. Agar aap chahe to unhe use kar sakte hain. Wo aap hi ke liye banaayi gayee hai.

Santa Singh : I think it is A, but I’m not sure.

Amitabh Bachchan : Not sure, Hmmm… Aap kya karna chahenge?

Santa Singh : I would like to use 50-50…

Amitabh Bachchan : Ok Computer Jee, Kripya 2 galat javab mita deejiye…

Computer deletes two names, and leaves the following options:

Now Amitabh Bachchan gets confused and worriedly thinks if the Computer is actually right or has got some bug!. Santa Singh gets all the more Confused after the 50-50 Lifeline…

Santa Singh : I would like to use my last life line too - Phone A Friend…

Amitabh Bachchan : Aap kisse baat karna chahenge??

Santa Singh : Main aapki Misej [Mrs.] Jaya Bachan Ji ko phone karna chahoonga…

Amitabh Bachchan Faints !!! But the Call gets connected to Jaya Bachchan [Thanks to AirTel ]…

Santa Singh : “Jayaji, Who is the father of Abhishek Bachchan!?”

receiving reply from JAYA Santa faints..

GUESS WHY????????? ??

Scroll Down

|
|
|
|
V

|
|
|
|
V

Jaya Bachchan ask’s him ” What are the options?”
lololololololololol:D :D :D :D ...dis 1 is d bst...lol

[glamour_jiya]

thank uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

[tukz]

thank uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu
my pleasure

[evilseye]

Gud work ppl!!!!Awesome !!Lolz!!
Luv
Sur

[glamour_jiya]

Hey sur can u tell me what is this proliferating sizzler

[juhirocks!!]

hey evan i wanna know abt it

[guru_sal]

lol gud ones guru...
thankx a lot tukz

[guru_sal]

ggoooddd work jiya

[guru_sal]

Dosti ke mayne hamse kya puchte ho,
Hum abhi in baton se anjaan hain,
Sirf ek gujarish hai ke bhool na jana hame,
Kyonki aapki dosti hi hamari jaan hai.

Saton Aasmaon ki sair ham kar aaye,
Har ek tare se Dosti kar aaye,
Ek Tara khas tha jise hum apne saath le aaye,
Varna aap hi Sochiye ki aap is zameen par kyoon aaye?

Waade bhi dost ne kya khub nibhaye,
Zakham muft mein aur dard tohfe me bhijwaye,
Is se badhkar wafa ki misaal kya hogi,
Maut se pehle hi dost kafan le aye


Suraj paas ho na ho, Roshni aaspaas rehti hai,
Chand paas ho na ho, Chandni aaspaas rehti hai,
Waise hi aap paas ho na ho,
Apki Yaadein hamesha saath rehti hai!

Legs utha ke karo,
Tange faila ke karo,
Ghuma ghuma ke karo,
Aage peechey dono taraf karo,
Jitna karoge utna halka mehsoos hoga
Oye I'm talking abt Yoga

Hotho se jo choo liya,
Ehsaas Aab tak hai,
Aankhe Nam hai, Aur sanson mein Aag ab tak hain,
Aur kyon na ho... Khayi Bhi to 'HARI Mirch' hai.

[juhirocks!!]

Dosti ke mayne hamse kya puchte ho,
Hum abhi in baton se anjaan hain,
Sirf ek gujarish hai ke bhool na jana hame,
Kyonki aapki dosti hi hamari jaan hai.

Saton Aasmaon ki sair ham kar aaye,
Har ek tare se Dosti kar aaye,
Ek Tara khas tha jise hum apne saath le aaye,
Varna aap hi Sochiye ki aap is zameen par kyoon aaye?

Waade bhi dost ne kya khub nibhaye,
Zakham muft mein aur dard tohfe me bhijwaye,
Is se badhkar wafa ki misaal kya hogi,
Maut se pehle hi dost kafan le aye


Suraj paas ho na ho, Roshni aaspaas rehti hai,
Chand paas ho na ho, Chandni aaspaas rehti hai,
Waise hi aap paas ho na ho,
Apki Yaadein hamesha saath rehti hai!

Legs utha ke karo,
Tange faila ke karo,
Ghuma ghuma ke karo,
Aage peechey dono taraf karo,
Jitna karoge utna halka mehsoos hoga
Oye I'm talking abt Yoga

Hotho se jo choo liya,
Ehsaas Aab tak hai,
Aankhe Nam hai, Aur sanson mein Aag ab tak hain,
Aur kyon na ho... Khayi Bhi to 'HARI Mirch' hai.
gud 1 guru!

[guru_sal]

gud 1 guru!
thankx alot juhi

[guru_sal]

1) Q : Wat is the height of mixed emotion ???Ans : Wen
ur mother -in- law falls from 7th floor on ur
mercedes.....

2) Boy: O Bewafa tune Shadi Q ki? Mera Dil jal k Raakh
ho gaya...
Girl: Fikr na kar tumhari Raakh bekar na jayegi...
Yahan bhej do Bartan dhone k kaam aayegi.

3) Nari ke chakkar me bhulo mat yari, Laat maaregi
naari to yaad ayegi yaari, Baat maano hamari ban jao
brahmchari, Ye jaankari janhit me jaari

4) What is d diff
btwn
daava n daru?

Dava
is lik ''grlfrnd"
dat comes
with expiry date

n

daru
is
like ''wife''
jitni purani hogi
utni sir pe chadti hai.

5) 1 Medical student ne apni classmate ko khun se
likha letter dekar kaha,"Muje iska ans jarur dena
Ladki Ne jawab diya,"Tumara blodgrup A+ Hai

6) Aey mere kadradan Dost meri jaan.Tum hamesha rahoge
hattekatte naujawan kyounki...Jab Khuda meherban to
GADHA bhi PAHALWAN.

7) Napolean:There's no such word as impossible in my
dictionary.....



Sardarji : Oye!!!
Toh dictionary dekh ke kharidni
thi na!



8) English teacher: "One cute & young girl is walking
on d road."
Change this into an Exclamatory sentence.
Student: "Oh GOD, what a piece!!!

9) BANIA apne bacho se bola-Jo rat ko khana nahi
khayega,use 5 Rs dunga.
Bache 5-5 Rs le kar so gaye.Subah bola-Jo 5Rs dega use
hi khana milega. JAI BANIA.

[glamour_jiya]

Dosti ke mayne hamse kya puchte ho,
Hum abhi in baton se anjaan hain,
Sirf ek gujarish hai ke bhool na jana hame,
Kyonki aapki dosti hi hamari jaan hai.

Saton Aasmaon ki sair ham kar aaye,
Har ek tare se Dosti kar aaye,
Ek Tara khas tha jise hum apne saath le aaye,
Varna aap hi Sochiye ki aap is zameen par kyoon aaye?

Waade bhi dost ne kya khub nibhaye,
Zakham muft mein aur dard tohfe me bhijwaye,
Is se badhkar wafa ki misaal kya hogi,
Maut se pehle hi dost kafan le aye


Suraj paas ho na ho, Roshni aaspaas rehti hai,
Chand paas ho na ho, Chandni aaspaas rehti hai,
Waise hi aap paas ho na ho,
Apki Yaadein hamesha saath rehti hai!

Legs utha ke karo,
Tange faila ke karo,
Ghuma ghuma ke karo,
Aage peechey dono taraf karo,
Jitna karoge utna halka mehsoos hoga
Oye I'm talking abt Yoga

Hotho se jo choo liya,
Ehsaas Aab tak hai,
Aankhe Nam hai, Aur sanson mein Aag ab tak hain,
Aur kyon na ho... Khayi Bhi to 'HARI Mirch' hai.

gud 1 guru
love jiya

[glamour_jiya]

1) Soowar ke bachhe!

Ullo ke patthe!

Kutte ke pille !

Gadhe ki aulaad !

Bhains ke bachhde,

Bakri ke memne,

Sab kitne chote-chote,
Piare-piare hote haina.


2) Tu chand mage, main chand de du.
Tu raat mage, main raat de du.
Tu dil mage, main dil de du.
Tu dil mage.
Bas yaar…
Bheek mangne ki bhi ek limit hoti hai!

3)__________________

__________________

__________________

__________________

__________________

__________________

Excuse me! kya dekh rahe ho?
Dekhte nahi busy hoon.
line-maar rahi hoon!

4)Can I have your picture, so Santa Claus knows exactly what to give me

[guru_sal]

1) Soowar ke bachhe!

Ullo ke patthe!

Kutte ke pille !

Gadhe ki aulaad !

Bhains ke bachhde,

Bakri ke memne,

Sab kitne chote-chote,
Piare-piare hote haina.


2) Tu chand mage, main chand de du.
Tu raat mage, main raat de du.
Tu dil mage, main dil de du.
Tu dil mage.
Bas yaar…
Bheek mangne ki bhi ek limit hoti hai!

3)__________________

__________________

__________________

__________________

__________________

__________________

Excuse me! kya dekh rahe ho?
Dekhte nahi busy hoon.
line-maar rahi hoon!

4)Can I have your picture, so Santa Claus knows exactly what to give me
gr8 work jiya

[guru_sal]

gud 1 guru
love jiya
thankx alot jiya

[smruti]

hey gr81 jiya :D ;)

A newly joined trainee engineer asks his boss " whats the meaning of an
appraisal ? "

Boss : "do you know the meaning of resignation? "

Trainee : "yes I do "

Boss : "So let me make you understand what an appraisal is by comparing it
with resignation"

Comparison Study: Appraisal and Resignation

In Appraisal meeting they will speak only about your weakness, errors,and
failures.

In resignation meeting they will speak only about your strengths,past
achievements and success.

************************************************** *****************

In Appraisal you may need to cry and beg for even 10% hike.

In resignation you can easily demand (or get even without asking) more than
50-60% hike.

************************************************** *****************

During Appraisal, they will deny promotion saying you didn't meet the
expectation, you don't have leadership qualities, u had several drawbacks in
our objective/goal.

During resignation, they will say you are the core member of team; you are
the vision of the company how can you go, you have to take the project on
shoulders and lead your juniors to
success.

************************************************** *****************

There is 90% chance for not getting any significant incentives after
appraisal.

There is 90% chance of getting immediate hike after u put the resignation.









luv
smruti

[tukz]

hey guru,jiya,n smruti gr8 wrk

[smruti]

hey guru,jiya,n smruti gr8 wrk

u r most welcome tukzz:)

[tukz]

u r most welcome tukzz
:) :) :) :)

[guru_sal]

hey gr81 jiya :D ;)

A newly joined trainee engineer asks his boss " whats the meaning of an
appraisal ? "

Boss : "do you know the meaning of resignation? "

Trainee : "yes I do "

Boss : "So let me make you understand what an appraisal is by comparing it
with resignation"

Comparison Study: Appraisal and Resignation

In Appraisal meeting they will speak only about your weakness, errors,and
failures.

In resignation meeting they will speak only about your strengths,past
achievements and success.

************************************************** *****************

In Appraisal you may need to cry and beg for even 10% hike.

In resignation you can easily demand (or get even without asking) more than
50-60% hike.

************************************************** *****************

During Appraisal, they will deny promotion saying you didn't meet the
expectation, you don't have leadership qualities, u had several drawbacks in
our objective/goal.

During resignation, they will say you are the core member of team; you are
the vision of the company how can you go, you have to take the project on
shoulders and lead your juniors to
success.

************************************************** *****************

There is 90% chance for not getting any significant incentives after
appraisal.

There is 90% chance of getting immediate hike after u put the resignation.









luv
smruti
gud work smruti
keep posying

[smruti]

gud work smruti
keep posying


thaxx a lot :)

[smruti]

:) :D :)


Hindi: Original:

A Kya Bolti Tu
A Kya Mai Bolu
Sun
Suna
Ati Kya Khandala
Kya karu Ake mai Khandala
Are Ghumenge, nachenge, gayenge Aish karenge or kya ?



English :


Aye what do you say?
Aye what should I say?
Listen.
Speak on.
Coming to khandala?
What should I do, coming to khandala?
We'll roam, we'll loaf, we'll sing, we'll dance
we"ll freak, baby,what else?

Sanskrit :

Aye balike, twam katham kathisyasi
Aye balakah aham kim kathisyamh
Shrinvasi
Shrunha
Kim twam khandaalaa agchasyasi
Aham kim kurwasyami khandaalayeh
gamisyami, bhramisyami, nryuthyami, gaayami, maja
karishma, kim karishyami?


Kannada:


ye... yen helti neeee
ye...na yen hel-li
kelu
helu
bartiya khandala..
yen madli....bandbittu khandala
&nb! sp; are...tirugona,kuniyona..koole madona..innenu



Telugu :


Aye, ainte chepphuta vu
Aye,ainte chepala
Vinu
Cheppu
Wastava Khandala
Yem Chesedhi? vacchi Khandala
Thiruguthamu, eguruthamu, aadthaamu, paadthaamu,maja
chesthamu inkemi?


Assamese:

ey ki kowo toi?
ey ki kom moi?
sun
suna
Jabi neki khandala?
ki korim goi moi kahandala
are ghurim, phurim, nasim,gaam,
khub phurti korim aru ki?


Punjabi :

A ke boldi tu;
A ke mein bolan;
Sunh
Sunha
Chaldi khandala
Ki karaan ae ke mein khandala
Are Ghoomenge, Turainge, Naachenge, Gaavenge, Mauj
Karenge, Aur Ki ?



Gujarati :


Aye shun bole tu?
Aye hun shun bolu?
Sambhal
Sambhlaav
A! ave chey su khandaalaa?
Shun karu aaviine khandaalaa?
Ghumshun, pharshun, naachshun, gaashun, majaa karshun,
beeju shun?



Marathi :


Aye kaai tu mhantes?
Aye kaai mi mhanhu?
Aik
Aikav
Yetes kai khandaalaa?
Kai karu yevon mi khandaalaa?
Are ghumuyaa, phiruyaa, gavuyaa, nachuyaa, aish
karuyaa, aankhin kai?


Kashmiri :


Heey, kya chaakh wannan
Heev, kya bhe wanneyyyy
Booz
Wanoo
Pakha telle khandalaa;
Kya karee weeteth bhe khandalaa
Pherevhey, nachevhey, geevevhey, khevevhey, eesh
karav, beyy kya?


Konkani :


Aye ! kitte sangta tu?
Aye ! aao kite sangu?
Saang
Saangta
Khandalaa yeta ghi?
Khandalaa yevun kithe kharche?
Bhovya, Phireya, Naachya, Gauya, maja korya, ani
kithe?


Bengali :


Ei ki bolis tui
Ei ki ar boli
Shon
Shonaa
Jabi ki khondalaa
Ki kori giye khondalaa
Are, ghurbo, phirbo, nachbo, gaibo, maja korbo ar ki?



Malayalam :


Aye yenna pariyunnu?
Aye nyan yenna pariyu?
Keku
Pariyu
Varinno khandala?
Yendu cheyam? Nyaan vannu Khandaala?
Karangam, ****tam, paadam, aadam, maja
cheyyam,verendha?



Sindhi :


Aye cha thi chaen tu?
Aye Maan chaa chavan?
Budh
Budhai
Acheti cha khandaalaa?
Cha kandis achi maan khandaalaa?
Are Ghumandasi, phirandasi, gayendasi,
Nachandasi,aaish kandasi, byo cha?


Magahi : (BIHARI)



A ki bolahin tu
A kya boliyuow hum
Sun
Sunaow
Aaimahi ki khandala
Ki kariaow aake hum khandala
Gumbai, Phirbai, naachai, gaayii, aish karbai aur ki



Oriya:


e kana kahuchhu tu?
e kana mu kahibi?
sun
suna
khandala jibu ki?
kana mu karibi khandala jaaiki?
arre buliba,ghuriba,naachiba,gaaeeba,maja kariba aau kana?


Coorg:


ey enthe anya neen?
Ey nan entha annana?
Kale
Annu
Bappiya khandala' k
Enthe maduva khandal'k poyith
Arre suthana, aadana, padana, majaa madana?injetha?
Foreign Languages :


German :


Was sagst du ?
Was soll ich sagen ?
Hor mal !
Sag mal !
Kommst Nach Khandala ?
Was machen wir in Khaldala ?
Wir gehen, spazieren, tanzen, singen, haben spa?,
was noch ?


Spanish :


Tu que deceas?
Yo que deseo?
Oye
Di me
Vas a tu khandaalaa?
Que haceo, yo voy en el khandaalaa?
Viajamos, vagabundeamos, bailamos, cantamos,
disfrutamos, si no.


Chinese :


Ain, Chon Zuan Ho?
Ain, Chon Hee Zuano?
Sui,
Suion,
Hyuan Chon Khandala?
Chon Tsuani Hyui Hee Khandala?
Chijuan, Kajuan, Marijuan, Siuan, Samshuan
Tsuaniya Tsu Chon?


Russian :


Aeich, Kov Speache niv?
Aeich, Kov miv Speache?
Nuushev,
Nuusheva,
Comeva Kov Khandala?
Kov Sheychev Comov miv Khandala?
Rotiv, Rotrach, Balleva, Opereacha, Enjova
Sheychevin, Kov
Gobraich?



French :


Aye! qu'est-ceque tu dis?
Aye! qu'est-ceque tu me vouler dire?
Entendre
Entendrez
Est-ceque tu viens a la Khandala
Qu'est-ceque je fais a aller a la Khandala ?
Promenez, Allez, Dansez, Chantez a quelle?




how is it?
luv:)
smruti

[tukz]

:) :D :)


Hindi: Original:

A Kya Bolti Tu
A Kya Mai Bolu
Sun
Suna
Ati Kya Khandala
Kya karu Ake mai Khandala
Are Ghumenge, nachenge, gayenge Aish karenge or kya ?



English :


Aye what do you say?
Aye what should I say?
Listen.
Speak on.
Coming to khandala?
What should I do, coming to khandala?
We'll roam, we'll loaf, we'll sing, we'll dance
we"ll freak, baby,what else?

Sanskrit :

Aye balike, twam katham kathisyasi
Aye balakah aham kim kathisyamh
Shrinvasi
Shrunha
Kim twam khandaalaa agchasyasi
Aham kim kurwasyami khandaalayeh
gamisyami, bhramisyami, nryuthyami, gaayami, maja
karishma, kim karishyami?


Kannada:


ye... yen helti neeee
ye...na yen hel-li
kelu
helu
bartiya khandala..
yen madli....bandbittu khandala
&nb! sp; are...tirugona,kuniyona..koole madona..innenu



Telugu :


Aye, ainte chepphuta vu
Aye,ainte chepala
Vinu
Cheppu
Wastava Khandala
Yem Chesedhi? vacchi Khandala
Thiruguthamu, eguruthamu, aadthaamu, paadthaamu,maja
chesthamu inkemi?


Assamese:

ey ki kowo toi?
ey ki kom moi?
sun
suna
Jabi neki khandala?
ki korim goi moi kahandala
are ghurim, phurim, nasim,gaam,
khub phurti korim aru ki?


Punjabi :

A ke boldi tu;
A ke mein bolan;
Sunh
Sunha
Chaldi khandala
Ki karaan ae ke mein khandala
Are Ghoomenge, Turainge, Naachenge, Gaavenge, Mauj
Karenge, Aur Ki ?



Gujarati :


Aye shun bole tu?
Aye hun shun bolu?
Sambhal
Sambhlaav
A! ave chey su khandaalaa?
Shun karu aaviine khandaalaa?
Ghumshun, pharshun, naachshun, gaashun, majaa karshun,
beeju shun?



Marathi :


Aye kaai tu mhantes?
Aye kaai mi mhanhu?
Aik
Aikav
Yetes kai khandaalaa?
Kai karu yevon mi khandaalaa?
Are ghumuyaa, phiruyaa, gavuyaa, nachuyaa, aish
karuyaa, aankhin kai?


Kashmiri :


Heey, kya chaakh wannan
Heev, kya bhe wanneyyyy
Booz
Wanoo
Pakha telle khandalaa;
Kya karee weeteth bhe khandalaa
Pherevhey, nachevhey, geevevhey, khevevhey, eesh
karav, beyy kya?


Konkani :


Aye ! kitte sangta tu?
Aye ! aao kite sangu?
Saang
Saangta
Khandalaa yeta ghi?
Khandalaa yevun kithe kharche?
Bhovya, Phireya, Naachya, Gauya, maja korya, ani
kithe?


Bengali :


Ei ki bolis tui
Ei ki ar boli
Shon
Shonaa
Jabi ki khondalaa
Ki kori giye khondalaa
Are, ghurbo, phirbo, nachbo, gaibo, maja korbo ar ki?



Malayalam :


Aye yenna pariyunnu?
Aye nyan yenna pariyu?
Keku
Pariyu
Varinno khandala?
Yendu cheyam? Nyaan vannu Khandaala?
Karangam, ****tam, paadam, aadam, maja
cheyyam,verendha?



Sindhi :


Aye cha thi chaen tu?
Aye Maan chaa chavan?
Budh
Budhai
Acheti cha khandaalaa?
Cha kandis achi maan khandaalaa?
Are Ghumandasi, phirandasi, gayendasi,
Nachandasi,aaish kandasi, byo cha?


Magahi : (BIHARI)



A ki bolahin tu
A kya boliyuow hum
Sun
Sunaow
Aaimahi ki khandala
Ki kariaow aake hum khandala
Gumbai, Phirbai, naachai, gaayii, aish karbai aur ki



Oriya:


e kana kahuchhu tu?
e kana mu kahibi?
sun
suna
khandala jibu ki?
kana mu karibi khandala jaaiki?
arre buliba,ghuriba,naachiba,gaaeeba,maja kariba aau kana?


Coorg:


ey enthe anya neen?
Ey nan entha annana?
Kale
Annu
Bappiya khandala' k
Enthe maduva khandal'k poyith
Arre suthana, aadana, padana, majaa madana?injetha?
Foreign Languages :


German :


Was sagst du ?
Was soll ich sagen ?
Hor mal !
Sag mal !
Kommst Nach Khandala ?
Was machen wir in Khaldala ?
Wir gehen, spazieren, tanzen, singen, haben spa?,
was noch ?


Spanish :


Tu que deceas?
Yo que deseo?
Oye
Di me
Vas a tu khandaalaa?
Que haceo, yo voy en el khandaalaa?
Viajamos, vagabundeamos, bailamos, cantamos,
disfrutamos, si no.


Chinese :


Ain, Chon Zuan Ho?
Ain, Chon Hee Zuano?
Sui,
Suion,
Hyuan Chon Khandala?
Chon Tsuani Hyui Hee Khandala?
Chijuan, Kajuan, Marijuan, Siuan, Samshuan
Tsuaniya Tsu Chon?


Russian :


Aeich, Kov Speache niv?
Aeich, Kov miv Speache?
Nuushev,
Nuusheva,
Comeva Kov Khandala?
Kov Sheychev Comov miv Khandala?
Rotiv, Rotrach, Balleva, Opereacha, Enjova
Sheychevin, Kov
Gobraich?



French :


Aye! qu'est-ceque tu dis?
Aye! qu'est-ceque tu me vouler dire?
Entendre
Entendrez
Est-ceque tu viens a la Khandala
Qu'est-ceque je fais a aller a la Khandala ?
Promenez, Allez, Dansez, Chantez a quelle?




how is it?
luv:)
smruti
haila...................gr8888888888888888888888 1

[smruti]

haila...................gr8888888888888888888888 1


thanxxxxxxxxx

[guru_sal]

gr8 work all of u
spec
smruti

[smruti]

gr8 work all of u
spec
smruti

thanxxxxxx

y r u not continuing the rapid sentence game?

luv
smruti

[guru_sal]

i love u in different languages


English - I love you
Afrikaans - Ek het jou lief
Albanian - Te dua
Arabic - Ana behibak (to male)
Arabic - Ana behibek (to female)
Armenian - Yes kez sirumen
Bambara - M'bi fe
Bangla - Aamee tuma ke bhalo aashi
Belarusian - Ya tabe kahayu
Bisaya - Nahigugma ako kanimo
Bulgarian - Obicham te
Cambodian - Soro lahn nhee ah
Cantonese Chinese - Ngo oiy ney a
Catalan - T'estimo
Cheyenne - Ne mohotatse
Chichewa - Ndimakukonda
Corsican - Ti tengu caru (to male)
Creol - Mi aime jou
Croatian - Volim te
Czech - Miluji te
Danish - Jeg Elsker Dig
Dutch - Ik hou van jou
Esperanto - Mi amas vin
Estonian - Ma armastan sind
Ethiopian - Afgreki'
Faroese - Eg elski teg
Farsi - Doset daram
Filipino - Mahal kita
Finnish - Mina rakastan sinua
French - Je t'aime, Je t'adore
Gaelic - Ta gra agam ort
Georgian - Mikvarhar
German - Ich liebe dich
Greek - S'agapo
Gujarati - Hoo thunay prem karoo choo
Hiligaynon - Palangga ko ikaw
Hawaiian - Aloha wau ia oi
Hebrew - Ani ohev otah (to female)
Hebrew - Ani ohev et otha (to male)
Hiligaynon - Guina higugma ko ikaw
Hindi - Hum Tumhe Pyar Karte hae
Hmong - Kuv hlub koj
Hopi - Nu' umi unangwa'ta
Hungarian - Szeretlek
Icelandic - Eg elska tig
Ilonggo - Palangga ko ikaw
Indonesian - Saya cinta padamu
Inuit - Negligevapse
Irish - Taim i' ngra leat
Italian - Ti amo
Japanese - Aishiteru
Kannada - Naanu ninna preetisuttene
Kapampangan - Kaluguran daka
Kiswahili - Nakupenda
Konkani - Tu magel moga cho
Korean - Sarang Heyo
Latin - Te amo
Latvian - Es tevi miilu
Lebanese - Bahibak
Lithuanian - Tave myliu
Malay - Saya cintakan mu / Aku cinta padamu
Malayalam - Njan Ninne Premikunnu
Mandarin Chinese - Wo ai ni
Marathi - Me tula prem karto
Mohawk - Kanbhik
Moroccan - Ana moajaba bik
Nahuatl - Ni mits neki
Navaho - Ayor anosh'ni
Norwegian - Jeg Elsker Deg
Pandacan - Syota na kita!!
Pangasinan - Inaru Taka
Papiamento - Mi ta stimabo
Persian - Doo-set daaram
Pig Latin - Iay ovlay ouyay
Polish - Kocham Ciebie
Portuguese - Eu te amo
Romanian - Te iubesc
Russian - Ya tebya liubliu
Scot Gaelic - Tha gra'dh agam ort
Serbian - Volim te
Setswana - Ke a go rata
Sign Language - ,\,,/ (represents position of fingers when signing'I Love You')
Sindhi - Maa tokhe pyar kendo ahyan
Sioux - Techihhila
Slovak - Lu`bim ta
Slovenian - Ljubim te
Spanish - Te quiero / Te amo
Swahili - Ninapenda wewe
Swedish - Jag alskar dig
Swiss-German - Ich lieb Di
Tagalog - Mahal kita
Taiwanese - Wa ga ei li
Tahitian - Ua Here Vau Ia Oe
Tamil - Nan unnai kathalikaraen
Telugu - Nenu ninnu premistunnanu
Thai - Chan rak khun (to male)
Thai - Phom rak khun (to female)
Turkish - Seni Seviyorum
Ukrainian - Ya tebe kahayu
Urdu - mai aap say pyaar karta hoo
Vietnamese - Anh ye^u em (to female)
Vietnamese - Em ye^u anh (to male)
Welsh - 'Rwy'n dy garu
Yiddish - Ikh hob dikh
Yoruba - Mo ni fe

[smruti]

i love u in different languages


English - I love you
Afrikaans - Ek het jou lief
Albanian - Te dua
Arabic - Ana behibak (to male)
Arabic - Ana behibek (to female)
Armenian - Yes kez sirumen
Bambara - M'bi fe
Bangla - Aamee tuma ke bhalo aashi
Belarusian - Ya tabe kahayu
Bisaya - Nahigugma ako kanimo
Bulgarian - Obicham te
Cambodian - Soro lahn nhee ah
Cantonese Chinese - Ngo oiy ney a
Catalan - T'estimo
Cheyenne - Ne mohotatse
Chichewa - Ndimakukonda
Corsican - Ti tengu caru (to male)
Creol - Mi aime jou
Croatian - Volim te
Czech - Miluji te
Danish - Jeg Elsker Dig
Dutch - Ik hou van jou
Esperanto - Mi amas vin
Estonian - Ma armastan sind
Ethiopian - Afgreki'
Faroese - Eg elski teg
Farsi - Doset daram
Filipino - Mahal kita
Finnish - Mina rakastan sinua
French - Je t'aime, Je t'adore
Gaelic - Ta gra agam ort
Georgian - Mikvarhar
German - Ich liebe dich
Greek - S'agapo
Gujarati - Hoo thunay prem karoo choo
Hiligaynon - Palangga ko ikaw
Hawaiian - Aloha wau ia oi
Hebrew - Ani ohev otah (to female)
Hebrew - Ani ohev et otha (to male)
Hiligaynon - Guina higugma ko ikaw
Hindi - Hum Tumhe Pyar Karte hae
Hmong - Kuv hlub koj
Hopi - Nu' umi unangwa'ta
Hungarian - Szeretlek
Icelandic - Eg elska tig
Ilonggo - Palangga ko ikaw
Indonesian - Saya cinta padamu
Inuit - Negligevapse
Irish - Taim i' ngra leat
Italian - Ti amo
Japanese - Aishiteru
Kannada - Naanu ninna preetisuttene
Kapampangan - Kaluguran daka
Kiswahili - Nakupenda
Konkani - Tu magel moga cho
Korean - Sarang Heyo
Latin - Te amo
Latvian - Es tevi miilu
Lebanese - Bahibak
Lithuanian - Tave myliu
Malay - Saya cintakan mu / Aku cinta padamu
Malayalam - Njan Ninne Premikunnu
Mandarin Chinese - Wo ai ni
Marathi - Me tula prem karto
Mohawk - Kanbhik
Moroccan - Ana moajaba bik
Nahuatl - Ni mits neki
Navaho - Ayor anosh'ni
Norwegian - Jeg Elsker Deg
Pandacan - Syota na kita!!
Pangasinan - Inaru Taka
Papiamento - Mi ta stimabo
Persian - Doo-set daaram
Pig Latin - Iay ovlay ouyay
Polish - Kocham Ciebie
Portuguese - Eu te amo
Romanian - Te iubesc
Russian - Ya tebya liubliu
Scot Gaelic - Tha gra'dh agam ort
Serbian - Volim te
Setswana - Ke a go rata
Sign Language - ,\,,/ (represents position of fingers when signing'I Love You')
Sindhi - Maa tokhe pyar kendo ahyan
Sioux - Techihhila
Slovak - Lu`bim ta
Slovenian - Ljubim te
Spanish - Te quiero / Te amo
Swahili - Ninapenda wewe
Swedish - Jag alskar dig
Swiss-German - Ich lieb Di
Tagalog - Mahal kita
Taiwanese - Wa ga ei li
Tahitian - Ua Here Vau Ia Oe
Tamil - Nan unnai kathalikaraen
Telugu - Nenu ninnu premistunnanu
Thai - Chan rak khun (to male)
Thai - Phom rak khun (to female)
Turkish - Seni Seviyorum
Ukrainian - Ya tebe kahayu
Urdu - mai aap say pyaar karta hoo
Vietnamese - Anh ye^u em (to female)
Vietnamese - Em ye^u anh (to male)
Welsh - 'Rwy'n dy garu
Yiddish - Ikh hob dikh
Yoruba - Mo ni fe


where did u get dat frm?
it's gr8

[guru_sal]

where did u get dat frm?
it's gr8
thankx
book se mila ye

[guru_sal]

its really worked


Here you have a great chance to know about yourself like your character
etc. without spending any money. This test was devised by oxford
university. It tells about your personality just by your choice. So
know
yourself & enjoy

Here it is.....

Imagine you walked into a small hut by the river in the jungle. You
pushed open the door, in front of you were 7 small beds to the right of
the hut,and another 7 small chairs surrounding a small round table. In
the middle of the table was a round food tray with 5 kinds of fruit in
it.

There are:
a. Apple
b. Banana
c. Strawberry
d. Peach
e. Orange

Which fruit will u choose?
Your choice reveals about u! Pls be very Honest to yourself.... & Now
scroll down for results:
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...............................................
TEST RESULTS:
Here are the results.
---------------------------
a. if you have chosen apple: that means you are a person who loves to
eat Apple

b. if you have chosen banana: that means you are a person who loves to
eat Banana

c. if you have chosen strawberry: that means you are a person who loves
to eat Strawberry

d. if you have chosen peach: that means you are a person who loves to
eat Peach

e. if you have chosen orange: that means you are a person who loves to
eat Orange





PS: If u r hunting for me to punch.....Well...I am here only

[guru_sal]

LOVELY LOVE LETTER

Jhony Mera Naam
Piya Ka Ghar
Choukee No. 11
Teesri Mansil
China Town
Bombay


Date: Nav Do Gyarah


My Dear " _ _ _ _ ": You must be surprised to receive this 'Prem Patra' from me. Let me make my 'Pehchan' to you as ' Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jaayenge' .


Though I am an "AWARA", I am also your "DEWAANA". I am making you a "Prarthna" to enter my "Zindagi" as "Priyatama" . Even though I do not have any "Sambhandh" with u, I still consider u as my "DREAM GIRL" with "Lal Dupatta Malmal ka". There are only "Do Raaste" left for me. One is to get your Love by "Tyag" or to go the "Rangeela" way. Wouldn't you like to be "Mere Jeewan Saathi" as you are "Lakhon Mein Ek"?


I also hope that you will "Guide" me in "Bahar" as we are made for "Ek Duje Ke Liye". We will live in "NAYA ZAMANA" where we have a "Suhana Safar". In this "Himalay Ki God Mein", our "Bandhan" is going to be tied with "Preet Ki Dor".


I hope that we will have nothing but "Anand" in "Yeh Dillagi". Aren't you bored of "Akele Hum Akele Tum" life?


Let this "Baazigar" be your "Boy Friend" and we start "Pehli Muhobbat".


This "Chahat" is going to lead to a "Milan" where you are going to call me every day for "Aao Pyaar Karen" . Now, "Phir Kab Miloge" as "Tumse Achha Kaun Hai"? As You know my love is "Himalay Se Uncha" and hopefully our "Mulakaat" will be "An Evening In Paris" .



"Aa Gale Lag Ja"!!
"Hum Aapke Hain KaunÂ…..??"
Â…Â…Â… "PREM PUJARI"

[shubha63]

hey cool work

[shubha63]

A policeman was interrogating 3 SARDARS who were training to become
detectives. To test their skills in recognizing a suspect, he shows the
first SARDAR a picture for 5 seconds and then hides it.

"This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?" The first SARDAR
answers, "That's easy, and we€ ¦â’ ’¹ll catch him fast because he only
has one eye!" The policeman says, "Well...uh.. .that's because the
picture I showed is his side profile."

Slightly flustered by this ridiculous response, he flashes the picture
for 5 seconds at the second SARDAR and asks him, "This is your suspect,
and how would you recognize him?" The second SARDAR smiles, flips his
hair and says, "Ha! He'd be too easy to catch because he only has one
ear!"

The policeman angrily responds, "What's the matter with you two?? Of
course only one eye and one ear are showing because it's a picture of
his side profile! Is that the best answer you can come up with?"

Extremely frustrated at this point, he shows the picture to the third
SARDAR and in a very testy voice asks, "This is your suspect, how would
you recognize him? He quickly adds, "Think hard before giving me a
stupid answer." The SARDAR looks at the picture intently for a moment
and says, "The suspect wears contact lenses."

The policeman is surprised and speechless because he really doesn't know
himself if the suspect wears contacts or not. "Well, that's an
interesting answer. Wait here for a few minutes while I check his file
and I'll get back to you on that."

He leaves the room and goes to his office, checks the suspect's file in
his computer, and comes back with a beaming smile on his face.

"Wow! I can't believe it. It's TRUE! The suspect does in fact wear
contact lenses. Good work! How were you able to make such an astute
observation? "

"That's easy," the SARDAR replied. "He can't wear regular glasses
because he only has one eye and one ear."

[guru_sal]

hey cool work
thankx shubha

[tukz]

A policeman was interrogating 3 SARDARS who were training to become
detectives. To test their skills in recognizing a suspect, he shows the
first SARDAR a picture for 5 seconds and then hides it.

"This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?" The first SARDAR
answers, "That's easy, and we€ ¦â’ ’¹ll catch him fast because he only
has one eye!" The policeman says, "Well...uh.. .that's because the
picture I showed is his side profile."

Slightly flustered by this ridiculous response, he flashes the picture
for 5 seconds at the second SARDAR and asks him, "This is your suspect,
and how would you recognize him?" The second SARDAR smiles, flips his
hair and says, "Ha! He'd be too easy to catch because he only has one
ear!"

The policeman angrily responds, "What's the matter with you two?? Of
course only one eye and one ear are showing because it's a picture of
his side profile! Is that the best answer you can come up with?"

Extremely frustrated at this point, he shows the picture to the third
SARDAR and in a very testy voice asks, "This is your suspect, how would
you recognize him? He quickly adds, "Think hard before giving me a
stupid answer." The SARDAR looks at the picture intently for a moment
and says, "The suspect wears contact lenses."

The policeman is surprised and speechless because he really doesn't know
himself if the suspect wears contacts or not. "Well, that's an
interesting answer. Wait here for a few minutes while I check his file
and I'll get back to you on that."

He leaves the room and goes to his office, checks the suspect's file in
his computer, and comes back with a beaming smile on his face.

"Wow! I can't believe it. It's TRUE! The suspect does in fact wear
contact lenses. Good work! How were you able to make such an astute
observation? "

"That's easy," the SARDAR replied. "He can't wear regular glasses
because he only has one eye and one ear."
hehehehehehehehehehehehehheehhehe gud 1se shubha:D

[shubha63]

thanks tukz

[smruti]

ha ha ha ha ha it's sooooooo funny!;)
gr8 wrk shubha:D
btw i'm smruti.:)

[smruti]

Every man should get married some time; after all,
happiness is not the only thing in life!! --Anonymous

---------------------------------------------------------------------
Bachelors should be heavily taxed. It is not fair that some men should
be happier than others. --Oscar Wilde

----------------------------------------------------------------------
Don't marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper. --Scottish Proverb

----------------------------------------------------------------------
I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years. --Sam Kinison

----------------------------------------------------------------------
A psychiatrist is a person who will give you expensive answers that your
wife will give you for free. --Anonymous
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Bachelors know more about women than married men;
if they didn't, they'd be married too. --H. L. Mencken
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Men have a better time than women; for one thing, they marry later;for
another thing, they die earlier. --H. L. Mencken

----------------------------------------------------------------------
- "A man without a woman is like a fish without a bicycle." - U2

----------------------------------------------------------------------
- Marriage is a three-ring circus:
--engagement ring
---wedding ring
---suffering
---------------------------------------------------------------------
When a newly married couple smiles, everyone knows why.
When a ten-year married couple smiles, everyone wonders why.

---------------------------------------------------------------------
Love is blind but marriage is an eye-opener.

----------------------------------------------------------------------
When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of
one thing: either the car is new or the wife.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back to home
always. --Anonymous

----------------------------------------------------------------------
I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary?" She
said,"Somewhere I have never been!" I told her, "How about the kitchen?"
--Anonymous
------------------------------------------------------------------
We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
My wife was in beauty saloon for two hours.
That was only for the estimate. --Anonymous
-------------------------------------------------------------------
She got a mudpack and looked great for two days.Then the mud fell
off. --Anonymous
---------------------------------------------------------------------
She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too late for the
garbage?"
Following her down the street I yelled, "No, jump in."
--Anonymous
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Badd Teddy recently explained to me why he refuses to get to
married. He says "the wedding rings look like minature handcuffs....."
--Anonymous
---------------------------------------------------------------------
If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife yelling at
the front door, who do you let in first?
The Dog of course...at least he'll shut up after u let him in!
--Anonymous
---------------------------------------------------------------------
A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly parted mother
and started back toward his car when his attention was diverted to
another man kneeling at a grave. The man seemed to be praying with
profound intensity and kept repeating, 'Why did u have to die?
Why did you have to die?" The first man approache d him and said,
"Sir, I don't wish to interfere with your private grief, but this
demonstration of pain in is more than I've ever seen before. For whom do you
mourn so? Deeply? A child? A parent?"The mourner took a moment to collect
himself, then replied "My wife's first husband."
----------------------------------------------------------------------
A couple came upon a wishing well. The husband leaned over, made a
wish and threw in a penny. The wife decided to make a wish, too. But she
leaned over too much, fell into the well, and drowned. The husband
was stunned for a while but then smiled " It really works ! "

[guru_sal]

Life Is A Gift

Today before we think of saying an unkind word
Think of someone who can't speak.

Before we complain about the taste of our food
Think of someone who has nothing to eat.

Today before we complain about life
Think of someone who went too early to heaven.



Before we argue about our dirty house, someone didn't clean or
sweep
Think of the people who are living in the streets .

Before whining about the distance we drive
Think of someone who walks the same distance with their feet.

And when we are tired and complain about our job
Think of the unemployed, the disabled and those who wished
they had our job.

But before we think of pointing the finger or condemning
another
Remember that not one of us are without sin and we all answer
to one maker.

And when depressing thoughts seem to get us down
Put a smile on our face and thank God we're alive and still around.

Life is a gift
Live it
Enjoy it
Celebrate it
EMBRACE IT
And fulfill it

[guru_sal]

gr8 work shubha and smruti

[shubha63]

hey cool work smruti n guru

[shubha63]

There are 7 Engineers and 7 Doctors going from PUNE to Mumbai. So they
all gather at Pune Station. Both groups are desperately trying to prove
their superiority.

Scene 1 (PUNE- MUMBAI)
So 7 engineers take only 1 Ticket amongst them and 7 doctors buy all 7
tickets.. Doctors are desperately waiting for TC to come...... When TC
arrives, All 7 Engineers get in one toilet SO when TC knocks , one hand
come out with the ticket and the TC goes away....
NOW on return Journey All of them don't get a direct train to PUNE So they
all decide to take a Passenger till Lonavala, from there they Can easily
get a LOCAL to PUNE so the passenger.....

SCENE 2 (MUMBAI - LONAVALA)
Doctors decide, "this time we will prove that we too are equally
SHAANE"....All 7 Doctors take 1 Ticket amongst them Engineers don't buy
any ticket at all!!!!!..TC arrives....ALL DOCTORS IN ONE TOILET.ALL
ENGINEERS IN THE OPPOSITE ONE..One engineer gets out and knocks the door
of Doctors toilet, One hand comes with the tickets, he takes the ticket
and comes in engg Bathroom...TC DRIVES out ALL the doctors from the toilet
and they are heavily fined........ the local....

SCENE 3 (LONAVALA - PUNE)
SO now both the group on LONAVALA station. Doctors planning their Move for
last chance.. they board the local to Pune. This time doctors decide that
they will play the same (1 ticket) trick. ALL Doctors take
1 tickets...Engineers BUY all 7 tickets this time... SO TC Comes.. All
Engineers show their tickets..... Doctors are still searching for toilet
in the LOCAL...........

[guru_sal]

There are 7 Engineers and 7 Doctors going from PUNE to Mumbai. So they
all gather at Pune Station. Both groups are desperately trying to prove
their superiority.

Scene 1 (PUNE- MUMBAI)
So 7 engineers take only 1 Ticket amongst them and 7 doctors buy all 7
tickets.. Doctors are desperately waiting for TC to come...... When TC
arrives, All 7 Engineers get in one toilet SO when TC knocks , one hand
come out with the ticket and the TC goes away....
NOW on return Journey All of them don't get a direct train to PUNE So they
all decide to take a Passenger till Lonavala, from there they Can easily
get a LOCAL to PUNE so the passenger.....

SCENE 2 (MUMBAI - LONAVALA)
Doctors decide, "this time we will prove that we too are equally
SHAANE"....All 7 Doctors take 1 Ticket amongst them Engineers don't buy
any ticket at all!!!!!..TC arrives....ALL DOCTORS IN ONE TOILET.ALL
ENGINEERS IN THE OPPOSITE ONE..One engineer gets out and knocks the door
of Doctors toilet, One hand comes with the tickets, he takes the ticket
and comes in engg Bathroom...TC DRIVES out ALL the doctors from the toilet
and they are heavily fined........ the local....

SCENE 3 (LONAVALA - PUNE)
SO now both the group on LONAVALA station. Doctors planning their Move for
last chance.. they board the local to Pune. This time doctors decide that
they will play the same (1 ticket) trick. ALL Doctors take
1 tickets...Engineers BUY all 7 tickets this time... SO TC Comes.. All
Engineers show their tickets..... Doctors are still searching for toilet
in the LOCAL...........
gud work shubha a

[guru_sal]

hey cool work smruti n guru
thankx alot

[priyu_22]

hey guys i am a newbie. i love this forum and u ppl. thnx for posting funny and entertaining stuff. but i wanna know dat is remix new season gonna start i f not can we put in a request. plz reply to my message !!! plz !!!!

[smruti]

hey guys i am a newbie. i love this forum and u ppl. thnx for posting funny and entertaining stuff. but i wanna know dat is remix new season gonna start i f not can we put in a request. plz reply to my message !!! plz !!!!


first of all welcum priyu,:D i'm smruti:)
i don;t think these star1 idiots
have got any brain to start d 2nd seasons
idiots morons dumbos inke iye toh galiyan short pad rahin hai

[guru_sal]

Amazing love letter



16, Hydrogen Tetraborate,
Carboxyl Road,
Propane
Dearest Alkali,
The day I saw you, there were sudden Chemical reactions within me involving phenolic and benzoic rings of love. Chemically, it was found that you were the reagent for the reaction. I wanted to convey my feeling that very day but since Aldehyde, Ketone and Ether were with you, I realized that the reaction conditions are unsuitable & you would show Chemical Inertness. So, I had to control the nuclear reactions of my mind using Cadmium rods.
If according to first law of Love Dynamics, the following reaction: Heart(Miss Alkali in absolute privacy), Affection can be propagated, then meet me at Ammonium Restaurant, Butyl Road at 5 PM failing which I shall consume a mixture of H2SO4 + HNO3 + CH3COOH + C4H5ClNO3 +
(C2H5)4Pb.

Yours Chemically,
Methanoic Acid

[shubha63]

thanks n gud work guru

[priyu_22]

first of all welcum priyu,:D i'm smruti:)
i don;t think these star1 idiots
have got any brain to start d 2nd seasons
idiots morons dumbos inke iye toh galiyan short pad rahin hai

Hey thnx a lot smriti. i know these ppl are just dumb... actually my name is priyanka, and nickname is priyu.;) :D

[priyu_22]

:D 9 RULES to LIVE HAPPY J ;)
1 - Live to relax!


2 - Love your bed, it is your temple!



3 - Relax in the day, so that you can sleep at night!

4 - Work is holy, so don't attack it!

5 - Don't do something tomorrow, that you can do the day afterwards!

6- Work as little as possible. Let the others do what needs to be done!

7 - Don't worry, nobody died from doing nothing, but you could get hurt at work!

8- If you feel like doing work, sit down and wait until that feeling goes away!

9 - Don't forget: working is healthy! So leave it for the sick
people!

[priyu_22]

LETTER FROM A SARDAR'S LOVING MOTHER:>>>>>>

Pyaarey puttar,
>>>>>> Vahe Guru. I'm writing this letter slow, because I know
>>>you cannot read fast.
>>>>>> We don't live where we did when you left home.
>>> Your dad read in the paper that most accidents happen 20
>>>miles from home,
>>> so we moved 20 miles.
>>>>>> I won't be able to send the address as the last
>>> Sardar who stayed here
>>> took the house numbers with them for their new house
>>> so they wouldn' t have to change their address.
>>>>>> This place is really nice. It even has a washing
>>> machine, situated right above the commode.
>>> I' m not sure it wor! ks too well.
>>> Last week I put in
>>> 3 shirts, pulled the chain and haven't seen them since.
>>>>>> The weather here isn't too bad. It rained only twice
>>> last week. The first time it rained for 3 days and
>>>second time for 4 days.
>>>>>> The coat you wanted me to send you, your Aunt said
>>> it would be a little
>>> too heavy to send in the mail with all the metal
>>> buttons, so we cut them
>>> off and put them in the pocket.
>>>>>> Your father has another job. He has 500 men under
>>> him. He is cutting the grass at the cemetery.
>>>>>> By the way I took bahu to our club's poolside. The
>>> manager is a badmash.He told her that two piece swimming
>>>suit is
>>> not allowed in this club. We were confused as to
>>> which piece should we remove?
>>>>>> Your sister had a baby this morning. I haven't found
>>> out whether it is a girl or a boy, so I don' t know
>>>whether you are an
>>> Aunt or Uncle.
>>>>>> Your uncle, Satinder fell in a nearby well. Some
>>> men tried to pull him out, but he f! ought them off
>>>bravely and drowned.
>>> We cremated him and he
>>> burned for three days.
>>>>>> Your best friend, Balwinder, is no more. He died
>>> trying to fulfil his father's last wishes. His father
>>>had wished to be
>>> buried in the sea after he died. And your friend died
>>>while in the
>>> process of digging a grave for his father.
>>>>>> There isn't much more news this time. Nothing much has>>>happened.
>>>>>> Love Mom.
>>>>>> P.S : I was going to send you some money but the
>>>envelope was already sealed.

[priyu_22]

BRILLIANT WAYS GIRLS
>>
>>
>> TURN GUYS DOWN!!
>>
>>
>>HE: I'm a photographer I've been looking for a face like yours!
>>SHE: I'm a plastic surgeon. I've been looking for a face like
>>yours!! HE: May I have the pleasure of this dance? SHE: No, I'd
>>like to have some pleasure too!!!
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>HE: How did you get to be so beautiful? SHE: I must have been given
>>your share!!!
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>HE: Will you come out with me this Saturday? SHE: Sorry! I'm having
>>a headache this weekend!!! HE: Go on, don't be shy. Ask me out!
>>SHE: Okay, get out!!!
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>HE: I think I could make you very happy SHE: Why? Are you leaving?
>>HE: What would you say if I asked u to marry me? SHE: Nothing. I
>>can't talk and laugh at the same time!!!
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>HE: Can I have your name? SHE: Why, don't you already have one? HE:
>>Shall we go and see a film? SHE: I've already seen it!!!
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>HE: Do you think it was fate that brought us together? SHE: Nah, it
>>was plain bad luck!!! HE: Where have you been all my life? SHE:
>>Hiding from you.
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>HE: Haven't I seen you someplace before? SHE: Yes, thats why I
>>don't go there anymore. HE: Is this seat empty? SHE: Yes, and this
>>one will be if you sit down .
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>HE: So, what do you do for a living? SHE: I'm a female
>>impersonator. HE: Hey baby, what's your sign? SHE: Do not enter.

[priyu_22]

You are addicted to the internet when......



You get a tatoo that says "This body best viewed with Netscape 2.01or higher."
All of your friends have an @ in their names.
And even your night dreams are in HTML
You turn on your intercom when leaving the room so you can hear if new e-mail arrives.
When looking at a pageful of someone else's links, you notice all of them are already highlighted in purple.
Your dog has its own home page.
You can't call your mother...she doesn't have a modem.
You check your mail. It says "no new messages." So you check it again.
Your phone bill makes your dad go crazy.
You code your homework in HTML and give your instructor the URL.
You wake up at 3 a.m. to go to the bathroom and stop and check your e-mail on the way back to bed.
Your mom makes a new rule: "The computer cannot come to bed."
You never have to deal with busy signals when calling your ISP...because you never log off.
You turn off your modem and get this awful empty feeling, like you just pulled the plug on a loved one.
Your heart races faster and beats irregularly each time you see a new WWW site address in print or on TV, even though you've never had heart problems before.
Your bookmark takes 15 minutes to scroll from top to bottom.
Your mother says communication is important in a family...so you ask her for another computer and install a second phone line so the two of you can chat.
As you forget to do your homework, your first instinct is to search for the "back" button.All your daydreaming is preoccupied with getting a faster \par connection to the net: 28.8...ISDN...cable modem..etc

You step out of your room and realize that you have guests at home and you don't have a clue when they came in.

[priyu_22]

THOUGHTS ON KIDS BY SOME MOTHERS !

... TO BE READ IN A HUMOROUS MOOD!




Mothers of teens know why some animals eat their young.



Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat
word for word what you shouldn't have said.



Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching
them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years
telling them to sit down and shut-up.



Insanity is hereditary. You get it from your kids.



I love to give homemade gifts. Which one of my kids
do you want?



Children are natural mimics who act like their parents,
despite every effort to teach them good manners.



Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like
shoveling the drive before it has stopped snowing.



"There is only one pretty child in the world... and every
mother has it." - Chinese Proverb.



Children will soon forget your presents. They will always
remember your presence.



The main purpose of holding children's parties is to remind
yourself that there are children more awful than your own.



Grandchildren are God's reward for not killing your kids.



"Who are these kids and why are they calling me Mom?"



You can fool some of the people all of the time and all of
the people some of the time, but you can never fool mom.



A child's greatest period of growth is the month after
you've purchased new school clothes.



Anyone who says "Easy as taking candy from a baby"
has never tried it.



The best inheritance parents can give their children is
a few minutes of their time each day.

[priyu_22]

Ways To Annoy People



Sing the Batman theme incessantly.
Ask people what gender they are.

Practice making fax and modem noises.

Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeeep Bip..."

If you have a glass, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.

Speak only in a "robot" voice.

Blow your nose when some one is eating.

Start each meal by conspicuously licking all your food, and announce that this is so no one will "eat away your food " !

Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.

Name your dog "Dog."

Claim that you must always wear a bicycle helmet as part of your "astronaut training."

Declare your apartment an independent nation, and sue your neighbors upstairs for "violating your airspace."

Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc:" them to your boss.

Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance.

Erect an elaborate network of ropes in your backyard, and tell the neighbors you are a "spider person."

Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy."

Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room.

Holler random numbers while someone is counting.

Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."

Drum on every available surface.

Staple papers in the middle of the page.

Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page.

Set alarms for random times.

Change channels five minutes before the end of every show.

ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE.

only type in lowercase.

dont use any punctuation either

Repeat everything someone says, as a question.

Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, it's gone now."

Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling, as they read.

Inform others that they exist only in your imagination.

Chew on pens that you've borrowed.

Wear a LOT of cologne.

Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.

Ask your co-workers mysterious questions, and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles."

Stare at static on the TV and claim you can see a "magic picture."

Select the same song on the jukebox fifty times.

Never make eye contact.

Never break eye contact.

Make appointments for the 31st of September.

Invite lots of people to other people's parties.

[guru_sal]

gud work priyu

[smruti]

hey priyuu
coool work


love
smruti

[guru_sal]

Aesi Apni Wife Ho......
Aesi apni wife ho...
5'9'' jiss ki height ho,
Jeans jiss ki tight ho,
Chehra jiss ka bright ho,
Weight mein thori light ho,
Umar mein difference slight ho,
Thori si wo quite ho,
Aesi apni wife ho...
Sarak pay sab kahain kya cute hai,
Bheer mein sab kahain side ho, side ho,
america ki paidaish ho,
Saas ki Khidmat jiss ki khwahish ho,
Aesi apni wife ho...
Parosi se jab baat karay tau
haath main uskay knife ho,
Dinner candle light ho,
Dono mein na kabhi fight ho,
Milnay say dil delight ho,
Kaash yeh concept 0.01% bhi right ho,
Agar aesi apni wife ho,

[priyu_22]

gud work priyu
thnx a lot !!:)

[priyu_22]

Aesi Apni Wife Ho......
Aesi apni wife ho...
5'9'' jiss ki height ho,
Jeans jiss ki tight ho,
Chehra jiss ka bright ho,
Weight mein thori light ho,
Umar mein difference slight ho,
Thori si wo quite ho,
Aesi apni wife ho...
Sarak pay sab kahain kya cute hai,
Bheer mein sab kahain side ho, side ho,
america ki paidaish ho,
Saas ki Khidmat jiss ki khwahish ho,
Aesi apni wife ho...
Parosi se jab baat karay tau
haath main uskay knife ho,
Dinner candle light ho,
Dono mein na kabhi fight ho,
Milnay say dil delight ho,
Kaash yeh concept 0.01% bhi right ho,
Agar aesi apni wife ho,


hey , i was gonna post da same thing !!!! did u get it from dat jokes site , from wer i posted da above stuff ?????

[priyu_22]

hey priyuu
coool work


love
smruti
thnx a lot smruti !!:)

[glamour_jiya]

priyu and smiruti awsome work keep posting

love jiya

[smruti]

priyu and smiruti awsome work keep posting

love jiya


hey jiya
thaxxxx:D

[smruti]

Subject: Good One !!!!

Once upon a time, there was a software engineer who used to develop programs
on his Pentium machine, sitting under a tree on the banks of a river. He
used to earn his bread by selling those programs in the Sunday market. One
day, while he was working, his machine tumbled off the table and fell in
the river. Encouraged by the Panchatantra story of his childhood (the
woodcutter and the axe), he started praying to the River Goddess. The River
Goddess wanted to test him and so appeared only after one month of rigorous
prayers.

The engineer told her that he had lost his computer in the river. As usual,
the Goddess wanted to test his honesty. She showed him a match box and
asked, "Is this your computer ?" Disappointed by the Goddess' lack of
computer awareness, the engineer replied, "No." She next showed him a
pocket-sized calculator and asked if that was his. Annoyed, the engineer
said "No, not at all!!" Finally, she came up with his own Pentium machine
and asked if it was his. The engineer, left with no option, sighed and said
"Yes."

The River Goddess was happy with his honesty. She was about to give him all
three items, but before she could make the offer, the engineer asked her,
"Don't you know that you're supposed to show me some better computers
before bringing up my own ?" The River Goddess, angered at this, replied,
"I know that, you stupid idiot! The first two things I showed you were the
Trillennium and the Billennium, the latest computers from IBM!"
So saying, she disappeared with the Pentium!!

Moral: If you're not up-to-date with technology trends, it is better keep
your mouth shut and let people think you're a genius, than to open your
mouth and remove all doubt!!!

[glamour_jiya]

1)Today, tommorow and yesterday there will be …
one heart that would always beat for you …
You know Whose??? … your Own Stupid!!!



2)Life without u is impossible,
u r in my breath and blood.
i cant stay for a second without u,
if u r not there i am dead
oye hello i am talking about OXYGEN

3)Sweet candies are nice to eat …
Sweet words are easy to say …
but, sweet ppl are hard to find …
OH MY GOD! how did u find me?

[smruti]

Ant and the Grasshopper
CLASSIC VERSION...

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house
and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the
summer away.

Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or
shelter so he dies out in the cold.
------------------------------------------------------------------------

MODERN VERSION...

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house
and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool
and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands
to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others
are cold and starving.

BBC, CNN, AAJ TAK, NDTV show up to provide pictures of the shivering
grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table
filled with food.

The World is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be that this poor
grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?

Arundhati Roy stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house.

Amnesty International and Koffi Annan criticizes the Government for not
upholding the fundamental rights of the grasshopper.

The Internet is flooded with online petitions seeking support to the
grasshopper.

Opposition MP's stage a walkout.

Left parties call for "Bharat Bandh" in West Bengal! and Kerala demanding a
Judicial Enquiry.

Finally, the Judicial Committee drafts the Prevention of Terrorism Against
Grasshoppers Act [POTAGA]", with effect from the beginning of the winter.

The ant is fined for failing to comply with POTAGA and, having nothing left
to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government and
handed over to the grasshopper in a ceremony covered by BBC,CNN, AAJ TAK and
NDTV.

Arundhati Roy calls it "a triumph of justice".



:D :D :D :D

[smruti]

1)Today, tommorow and yesterday there will be …
one heart that would always beat for you …
You know Whose??? … your Own Stupid!!!



2)Life without u is impossible,
u r in my breath and blood.
i cant stay for a second without u,
if u r not there i am dead
oye hello i am talking about OXYGEN

3)Sweet candies are nice to eat …
Sweet words are easy to say …
but, sweet ppl are hard to find …
OH MY GOD! how did u find me?



gud1
jiya:)

[glamour_jiya]

Ant and the Grasshopper
CLASSIC VERSION...

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house
and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the
summer away.

Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or
shelter so he dies out in the cold.
------------------------------------------------------------------------

MODERN VERSION...

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house
and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool
and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands
to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others
are cold and starving.

BBC, CNN, AAJ TAK, NDTV show up to provide pictures of the shivering
grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table
filled with food.

The World is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be that this poor
grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?

Arundhati Roy stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house.

Amnesty International and Koffi Annan criticizes the Government for not
upholding the fundamental rights of the grasshopper.

The Internet is flooded with online petitions seeking support to the
grasshopper.

Opposition MP's stage a walkout.

Left parties call for "Bharat Bandh" in West Bengal! and Kerala demanding a
Judicial Enquiry.

Finally, the Judicial Committee drafts the Prevention of Terrorism Against
Grasshoppers Act [POTAGA]", with effect from the beginning of the winter.

The ant is fined for failing to comply with POTAGA and, having nothing left
to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government and
handed over to the grasshopper in a ceremony covered by BBC,CNN, AAJ TAK and
NDTV.

Arundhati Roy calls it "a triumph of justice".



:D :D :D :D


it was too gud accha mera 3 monkeys wala old new versoin dekha tha

[smruti]

it was too gud accha mera 3 monkeys wala old new versoin dekha tha


nahi? wat r u talking about:confused:

[animateash]

every1 gud work......

[tukz]

hey smruti...gr8 job gal;)

[priyu_22]

priyu and smiruti awsome work keep posting

love jiya

thnx a lot !! yes i'll post some more funny things !! :D

[priyu_22]

Subject: Good One !!!!

Once upon a time, there was a software engineer who used to develop programs
on his Pentium machine, sitting under a tree on the banks of a river. He
used to earn his bread by selling those programs in the Sunday market. One
day, while he was working, his machine tumbled off the table and fell in
the river. Encouraged by the Panchatantra story of his childhood (the
woodcutter and the axe), he started praying to the River Goddess. The River
Goddess wanted to test him and so appeared only after one month of rigorous
prayers.

The engineer told her that he had lost his computer in the river. As usual,
the Goddess wanted to test his honesty. She showed him a match box and
asked, "Is this your computer ?" Disappointed by the Goddess' lack of
computer awareness, the engineer replied, "No." She next showed him a
pocket-sized calculator and asked if that was his. Annoyed, the engineer
said "No, not at all!!" Finally, she came up with his own Pentium machine
and asked if it was his. The engineer, left with no option, sighed and said
"Yes."

The River Goddess was happy with his honesty. She was about to give him all
three items, but before she could make the offer, the engineer asked her,
"Don't you know that you're supposed to show me some better computers
before bringing up my own ?" The River Goddess, angered at this, replied,
"I know that, you stupid idiot! The first two things I showed you were the
Trillennium and the Billennium, the latest computers from IBM!"
So saying, she disappeared with the Pentium!!

Moral: If you're not up-to-date with technology trends, it is better keep
your mouth shut and let people think you're a genius, than to open your
mouth and remove all doubt!!!

Hey good work smruti !!

[priyu_22]

good work jiya and smruti .. hey ppl i wanna send u'll very cute e-mail. can u'll post ur e-mail id's

[smruti]

Hey good work smruti !!


thanxxxx priyu;)

[smruti]

hey smruti...gr8 job gal;)


thaxxx tukzz

[smruti]

every1 gud work......


thanxxxxxxxxxxx

[smruti]

It can happen only in Indian Movies

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Baghban : Amitabh Bachchan and Hema Malini are separated right after Holi remember Amitabh singing Holi khele Raghubeera?). They are said to be separated for six months, ie from March to September. Within that six-month period, they celebrate Valentine's Day, which falls on February 14, and karva chauth, which is usually observed in October. There is no way these two occasions could come between March and September!


Lagaan : Lagaan was shot in the late 19th century. At the time, an over in cricket used to consist of 8 balls. But in this movie, an over has 6 balls.
Maybe modern cricket learnt from the movie.


Amar Akbar Anthony : Three men donate blood at the same time to the same person.
Awwal Number: Dev Anand is an omnipotent genius -- former cricketer,captain, army chief, commissioner, you name it. And Aamir Khan carries a huge transistor in his pocket while batting!
Khalnayak : The police tracks the villain from an MS Word Document screen! something that office team will be interested in)


Pyar To Hona Hi Tha : Kajol gets off the train to use the public toilet at the railway station and the train chugs off without her. Poor girl,little did she know that every train compartment has four toilets inside.

Khiladiyon Ka Khiladi : Akshay Kumar boards a Jet Airways flight to America. Well, well, some promotion for our Indian Jet Airways. Since when did they start flying international?


Raja Hindustani : Navneet Nishan has short hair before marriage. After tying the knot, she acquires waist-length hair overnight. What a hair-raising experience!


Raja : Dilip Tahil empties a can of petrol over Madhuri Dixit. Minutes later, Sanjay Kapoor takes the same can and pours it over Dilip Tahil. That's what I call an autofill!


Guddu : Manisha Koirala and Shah Rukh Khan are seen hanging on a para****e during a song. But when the song ends, they land on a glider. What a
switch above sea level!

Tere Mere Sapne : Priya Gill is doing her BA. But at the bus stop, she is carrying an electrical technology thesis by B L Theraja. What an electrifying interest !
:p :confused: :rolleyes: :D

[crazyfan]

hey smruti dat was kul.never noticed it:cool:

[tukz]

thaxxx tukzz
my pleasure....:D n agn gud 1

[shubha63]

hey. good work smruti

[smruti]

hey smruti dat was kul.never noticed it:cool:


hey thanxx aditi

[smruti]

hey. good work smruti


thanxxxx shubha

[priyu_22]

:D Bihar Driving License... :D

================================================== ==============


DERIVING LICENSE APPLIKASON PHOROM

------------------------------------------ -----------------------

NOTE: Please do not soot the person at the applikason kounter.

He will give you the
licen.

If you dot know how to fill ,copy from your phriend (dost)applikason.

For phurthar instructions, see bottom applikason.

1. Last name:

(_)
Yadav (_) Sinha (_) Pandey (_) Misra (_) Dont no

(Check karet box)

2. phust name:

(_) Ramprasad (_) Lakhan (_) Sivprasad (_) Jamnaprasad (_) Dont no

(Check karet
box)

3. Age:

(_) Less than phipty (_) Greater than phipty (_) Dont no

(Check karet box)

4. Sex: ____ M _____(F) _____ not sure _____not applicable color=black>

5. Chappal Size: ____ Lepht ____ Right

6.Occupason:

(_) Politison (_) Doodhwala (_) Pehelwaan (_) House wife (_) Un-employed

(Check karet box)

7. Number of children libing in the household: ___

8. Number that are yourj: ___

9. Mather name: _______________________

10. Phather Name: ____________________ (If not no,leabe
blank)

11. Ejjucason: 1 2 3 4 (Circle highest kilass attended)

12. Dental rekard:

(_) Ellow (_) Berownish-ellow (_) Berown (_) Belack (_) Other -__________ Give egjhakt color

(Check karet box)

13.Your thumb imparesson :

____________________________

(If you are copying from another applikason pharom, pleaje do not copy thumb impression also. Pleaje

size=5>provide your own thumb impression.)

PELEAJE DO NOT USE PHINGERS OF YOUR LEGS

Use thumb on your lepht hand only. If you dont have le pht hand, use your thumb on right hand. If you do not have right hand, use thumb on lepht hand.

NOTE : IF YOU DONT HAVE BOTH HANDS, YOU CANNOT DERIVE. color=black>

WE ARE VARY ISTRICT ABOUT THIS

[priyu_22]

good work smruti!! hey ppl plz give me ur ids wanna forward a funny e-mail

[guru_sal]

good work smruti!! hey ppl plz give me ur ids wanna forward a funny e-mail
its gurusaluja@yahoo.com
and
guru_saluja@hotmail.com

[guru_sal]

Collection of famous quotes by Navjot Singh Sidhu

1. That ball went so high it could have got an air hostess down with it.
2. There is light at the end of the tunnel for India, but it's that of an incoming train which will run them over.
3. Experience is like a comb that life gives you when you are bald.
4. This quote was made after Ganguly called Dravid for a run and midway sent him back and Dravid was run out in the third test against the West Indies at Barbados."Ganguly has thrown a drowning man both ends of the rope."
5. Sri Lankan score is running like an Indian taximeter.
6. Statistics are like miniskirts, they reveal more than what they hide.
7. Wickets are like wives - you never know which way they will turn!
8. He is like Indian three-wheeler, which will suck a lot of diesel but cannot go beyond 30!
9. The Indians are going to beat the Kiwis! Let me tell you, my friend that the Kiwi is the only bird in the whole world, which does not have wings!
10. As uncomfortable as a bum on a porcupine.
11. The ball whizzes past like a bumble -bee and the Indians are in the sea.
12. The Indians are finding the gaps like a pin a haystack.
13. The pitch is as dead as a dodo.
14. Deep Dasgupta is as confused as a child is in a topless bar!
15. The way Indian wickets are falling reminds of the cycle stand at Rajendra Talkies in Patiala one falls and everything else falls!
16. Indian team without Sachin is like giving Kiss without a Squeeze.
17. You cannot make Omelets without breaking the eggs.
18. Deep Dasgupta is not a Wicket Keeper, he is a goalkeeper. He must be given a free transfer to Manchester United.
19. He will fight a rattlesnake and give it the first two bites too.
20. One, who doesn't throw the dice, can never expect to score a six.
21. This quote was made after Eddie Nichols, the third umpire, ruled Shivnarine Chanderpaul 'NOT OUT' in the second test at Port of Spain T&T "Eddie Nichols is a man who cannot find his own buttocks with his two hands."
22. Anybody can pilot a ship when the sea is calm.
23. Nobody travels on the road to success without a puncture or two.
24. You got to choose between tightening your belt or losing your pants.
25. The cat with gloves catches no mice.
26. Age has been perfect fire extinguisher for flaming youth.
27. You may have a heart of gold, but so does a hard-boiled egg.
28. He is like a one-legged man in a bum kicking competition.
29. The third umpires should be changed as often as nappies and for the same reason.
30. Kumble's bowling at the moment is flat as a Dosa

[priyu_22]

its gurusaluja@yahoo.com
and
guru_saluja@hotmail.com

hey guru_sal , i sent u 2 mails on both ur id's hope u like it

[tukz]

hey priyu n guru...both of u gr8 wrk

[smruti]

good work smruti!! hey ppl plz give me ur ids wanna forward a funny e-mail


thanxx dearest
and my id is
smruti.parhi@rediffmail.com

[smruti]

Collection of famous quotes by Navjot Singh Sidhu

1. That ball went so high it could have got an air hostess down with it.
2. There is light at the end of the tunnel for India, but it's that of an incoming train which will run them over.
3. Experience is like a comb that life gives you when you are bald.
4. This quote was made after Ganguly called Dravid for a run and midway sent him back and Dravid was run out in the third test against the West Indies at Barbados."Ganguly has thrown a drowning man both ends of the rope."
5. Sri Lankan score is running like an Indian taximeter.
6. Statistics are like miniskirts, they reveal more than what they hide.
7. Wickets are like wives - you never know which way they will turn!
8. He is like Indian three-wheeler, which will suck a lot of diesel but cannot go beyond 30!
9. The Indians are going to beat the Kiwis! Let me tell you, my friend that the Kiwi is the only bird in the whole world, which does not have wings!
10. As uncomfortable as a bum on a porcupine.
11. The ball whizzes past like a bumble -bee and the Indians are in the sea.
12. The Indians are finding the gaps like a pin a haystack.
13. The pitch is as dead as a dodo.
14. Deep Dasgupta is as confused as a child is in a topless bar!
15. The way Indian wickets are falling reminds of the cycle stand at Rajendra Talkies in Patiala one falls and everything else falls!
16. Indian team without Sachin is like giving Kiss without a Squeeze.
17. You cannot make Omelets without breaking the eggs.
18. Deep Dasgupta is not a Wicket Keeper, he is a goalkeeper. He must be given a free transfer to Manchester United.
19. He will fight a rattlesnake and give it the first two bites too.
20. One, who doesn't throw the dice, can never expect to score a six.
21. This quote was made after Eddie Nichols, the third umpire, ruled Shivnarine Chanderpaul 'NOT OUT' in the second test at Port of Spain T&T "Eddie Nichols is a man who cannot find his own buttocks with his two hands."
22. Anybody can pilot a ship when the sea is calm.
23. Nobody travels on the road to success without a puncture or two.
24. You got to choose between tightening your belt or losing your pants.
25. The cat with gloves catches no mice.
26. Age has been perfect fire extinguisher for flaming youth.
27. You may have a heart of gold, but so does a hard-boiled egg.
28. He is like a one-legged man in a bum kicking competition.
29. The third umpires should be changed as often as nappies and for the same reason.
30. Kumble's bowling at the moment is flat as a Dosa


its gr8 guru

[priyu_22]

hey priyu n guru...both of u gr8 wrk

hey thaaannnx tukz.

--priyanka (priyu)

[priyu_22]

1 cup Tension
2 cups Stress
1 1/2 teaspoons of Guilt
2 heaping cups of Limited Time
3/4 tablespoon of Urgency
A dash of "No Other Choice"
3 level cups of Faith

..thats all thats there in life..

Directions:

Fold ingredients gently into a bowl.Mix vigorously and add a few tears. You'll sweat a little as you knead the dough. Pack it firmly between your hopes and dreams and form into a perfect little ball. Sprinkle it with a little determination, rolling the ball in the flour until fully covered.

Place it under a veil of belief and allow it to rise.

Put it in an oven of life that has been pre-set at the perfect temperature setting for the heat of trials and tribulations.

Allow it to brown under the warmth of God's love.
Remove after due season and allow to cool in the confidence of His promise.

Garnish with your praises. Arrange neatly on a platter of thankfulness and serve it to friends, families and,
oh yes, absolut: strangers . . . invite them too!

[smruti]

1 cup Tension
2 cups Stress
1 1/2 teaspoons of Guilt
2 heaping cups of Limited Time
3/4 tablespoon of Urgency
A dash of "No Other Choice"
3 level cups of Faith

..thats all thats there in life..

Directions:

Fold ingredients gently into a bowl.Mix vigorously and add a few tears. You'll sweat a little as you knead the dough. Pack it firmly between your hopes and dreams and form into a perfect little ball. Sprinkle it with a little determination, rolling the ball in the flour until fully covered.

Place it under a veil of belief and allow it to rise.

Put it in an oven of life that has been pre-set at the perfect temperature setting for the heat of trials and tribulations.

Allow it to brown under the warmth of God's love.
Remove after due season and allow to cool in the confidence of His promise.

Garnish with your praises. Arrange neatly on a platter of thankfulness and serve it to friends, families and,
oh yes, absolut: strangers . . . invite them too!


it's awesome

[guru_sal]

1 cup Tension
2 cups Stress
1 1/2 teaspoons of Guilt
2 heaping cups of Limited Time
3/4 tablespoon of Urgency
A dash of "No Other Choice"
3 level cups of Faith

..thats all thats there in life..

Directions:

Fold ingredients gently into a bowl.Mix vigorously and add a few tears. You'll sweat a little as you knead the dough. Pack it firmly between your hopes and dreams and form into a perfect little ball. Sprinkle it with a little determination, rolling the ball in the flour until fully covered.

Place it under a veil of belief and allow it to rise.

Put it in an oven of life that has been pre-set at the perfect temperature setting for the heat of trials and tribulations.

Allow it to brown under the warmth of God's love.
Remove after due season and allow to cool in the confidence of His promise.

Garnish with your praises. Arrange neatly on a platter of thankfulness and serve it to friends, families and,
oh yes, absolut: strangers . . . invite them too!
dats gr8 priyu
keep posting

[divyaashimix]

1 cup Tension
2 cups Stress
1 1/2 teaspoons of Guilt
2 heaping cups of Limited Time
3/4 tablespoon of Urgency
A dash of "No Other Choice"
3 level cups of Faith

..thats all thats there in life..

Directions:

Fold ingredients gently into a bowl.Mix vigorously and add a few tears. You'll sweat a little as you knead the dough. Pack it firmly between your hopes and dreams and form into a perfect little ball. Sprinkle it with a little determination, rolling the ball in the flour until fully covered.

Place it under a veil of belief and allow it to rise.

Put it in an oven of life that has been pre-set at the perfect temperature setting for the heat of trials and tribulations.

Allow it to brown under the warmth of God's love.
Remove after due season and allow to cool in the confidence of His promise.

Garnish with your praises. Arrange neatly on a platter of thankfulness and serve it to friends, families and,
oh yes, absolut: strangers . . . invite them too!
hey PRIYU...tahst ossuummmmm dearest!!!!!:D

[priyu_22]

it's awesome


thnaaannnnnnnxxxx .. but hey listen u sent me some filmstar e-mail right ?? lekin da pics are not opening !!

[priyu_22]

hey PRIYU...tahst ossuummmmm dearest!!!!!:D


hey divya thannnx .. i really luv ur fanfics!! dey r simply gr8 and are hilarious tooo. plz post more fanfics.... u know wat YOU must start a new remix season ..DAT WLD BE KOOL. lekin plz mujhe bhi help karo fanfic likhne ke liye !!! u write sooo well !!

[priyu_22]

dats gr8 priyu
keep posting

thanxxx yes i will post more stuff :)

[priyu_22]

hey ppl plz can u'll post ur real names also cuz i donno wat to call u'll !!!

[divyaashimix]

hey ppl plz can u'll post ur real names also cuz i donno wat to call u'll !!!
hey priyu, my real name is DIVYA !!!!!!!!!!!!!:)

[guru_sal]

Let's Check your IQ



Tortoise and rabbit gave CET exam and tortoise got 80% and rabbit got 81%.

Both wanted admission in a good engineering college, cut off was 85%.

Rabbit dint get but tortoise got…





How….

.

.

..

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Ans: Remember tortoise had won the race when you were in first standard..

So.. Sports quota!!!!

[priyu_22]

Let's Check your IQ



Tortoise and rabbit gave CET exam and tortoise got 80% and rabbit got 81%.

Both wanted admission in a good engineering college, cut off was 85%.

Rabbit dint get but tortoise got…





How….

.

.

..

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Ans: Remember tortoise had won the race when you were in first standard..

So.. Sports quota!!!!


Hey guru nice work yaarrrr..

[priyu_22]

hey priyu, my real name is DIVYA !!!!!!!!!!!!!:)

Hey divya , u and smruti are da only ppl i think whose names i knew from first, but anyways yaarrr thnx...

For those who dont know i'm priyanka & my nickname is priyu.

[smruti]

thnaaannnnnnnxxxx .. but hey listen u sent me some filmstar e-mail right ?? lekin da pics are not opening !!

u r welcum
okay i'll send it again sweetie

[smruti]

Let's Check your IQ



Tortoise and rabbit gave CET exam and tortoise got 80% and rabbit got 81%.

Both wanted admission in a good engineering college, cut off was 85%.

Rabbit dint get but tortoise got…





How….

.

.

..

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Ans: Remember tortoise had won the race when you were in first standard..

So.. Sports quota!!!!





gr8 one ...............

[smruti]

Family Problems



Two men, one American and an Indian were sitting in a bar drinking shot after shot.

The Indian man said to the American, "You know my parents are forcing me to get married to this so called homely girl from a village whom I haven't even met once." We call this arranged marriage.

I don't want to marry a woman whom I don't love... I told them that openly and now have a hell lot of family problems."

The American said, Talking about love marriages... I'll tell you my story.

I married a widow whom I deeply loved and dated for 3 years. "After a couple of years, my father fell in love with my step-daughter and so my father became my son-in-law and I became my father's father-in-law.

Legally now my daughter is my mother and my wife my grandmother.

More problems occurred when I had a son. My son is my father's brother and so he is my uncle. Situations turned worse when my father had a son. Now my father's son i.e. my brother is my grandson.

Ultimately, I have become my own grand father and I am my own grandson.

And you say you have family problems..

Gimme a break !!

[guru_sal]

Hey guru nice work yaarrrr..
thnakx a lot priyyanka

and im gurpreet

[guru_sal]

Family Problems



Two men, one American and an Indian were sitting in a bar drinking shot after shot.

The Indian man said to the American, "You know my parents are forcing me to get married to this so called homely girl from a village whom I haven't even met once." We call this arranged marriage.

I don't want to marry a woman whom I don't love... I told them that openly and now have a hell lot of family problems."

The American said, Talking about love marriages... I'll tell you my story.

I married a widow whom I deeply loved and dated for 3 years. "After a couple of years, my father fell in love with my step-daughter and so my father became my son-in-law and I became my father's father-in-law.

Legally now my daughter is my mother and my wife my grandmother.

More problems occurred when I had a son. My son is my father's brother and so he is my uncle. Situations turned worse when my father had a son. Now my father's son i.e. my brother is my grandson.

Ultimately, I have become my own grand father and I am my own grandson.

And you say you have family problems..

Gimme a break !!
guuuuudd one smruti

[guru_sal]

gr8 one ...............
thankuuuu smruti

[priyu_22]

u r welcum
okay i'll send it again sweetie

Ok candy..... candy.... lol I kno its a dumb name...... cuz i know u dot like to be called chicklet.

[glamour_jiya]

hey priyu and guru awsome onces yaar

[priyu_22]

Family Problems



Two men, one American and an Indian were sitting in a bar drinking shot after shot.

The Indian man said to the American, "You know my parents are forcing me to get married to this so called homely girl from a village whom I haven't even met once." We call this arranged marriage.

I don't want to marry a woman whom I don't love... I told them that openly and now have a hell lot of family problems."

The American said, Talking about love marriages... I'll tell you my story.

I married a widow whom I deeply loved and dated for 3 years. "After a couple of years, my father fell in love with my step-daughter and so my father became my son-in-law and I became my father's father-in-law.

Legally now my daughter is my mother and my wife my grandmother.

More problems occurred when I had a son. My son is my father's brother and so he is my uncle. Situations turned worse when my father had a son. Now my father's son i.e. my brother is my grandson.

Ultimately, I have become my own grand father and I am my own grandson.

And you say you have family problems..

Gimme a break !!



CONFUSSION CONFUSSION & CONFUSSION ..... But ...LOL... Gr8 one:D

[priyu_22]

thnakx a lot priyyanka

and im gurpreet

U r welcome Gurpreet ;)

[priyu_22]

hey priyu and guru awsome onces yaar

Thnxxxxx jiya

[priyu_22]

21st Century...

Our communication - Wireless

Our dress - Topless

Our telephone - Cordless

Our cooking - Fireless

Our youth - Jobless

Our food - Fatless

Our labour - Effortless

Our conduct - Worthless

Our relation - Loveless

Our attitude - Careless

Our feelings - Heartless

Our politics - Shameless

Our education - Valueless

Our follies - Countless

Our arguments - Baseless

Our Job - Thankless

Our Salary - Very less

[guru_sal]

hey priyu and guru awsome onces yaar
thankx a lot jiya

[guru_sal]

21st Century...

Our communication - Wireless

Our dress - Topless

Our telephone - Cordless

Our cooking - Fireless

Our youth - Jobless

Our food - Fatless

Our labour - Effortless

Our conduct - Worthless

Our relation - Loveless

Our attitude - Careless

Our feelings - Heartless

Our politics - Shameless

Our education - Valueless

Our follies - Countless

Our arguments - Baseless

Our Job - Thankless

Our Salary - Very less
again gud job priyu

[priyu_22]

HOW TO START YOUR DAY WITH A POSITIVE OUTLOOK

1 . Open a new file in your PC .

2. Name it " Boss " 3. Send it to the RECYCLE BIN

4 . Empty the RECYCLE BIN

5. Your PC will ask you, "Are you sure you want to delete Boss permanently?"

6. Answer calmly, "Yes," and press the mouse button firmly....
7 . Feel better?

HAVE A NICE DAY

[priyu_22]

again gud job priyu

thnkuuuu gurpreet

[guru_sal]

1. Cigarette: A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool at the other.

2. Love affairs: Something like cricket where one-day internationals are more popular than a five day test.

3. Marriage: It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master

4. Divorce: Future tense of marriage

5. Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either".
6.
Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

7. Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.

8. Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated by feminine water-power. ..

9. Dictionary: A place where divorce comes before marriage.

10. Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens & everybody disagrees later on.

11. Ecstasy: A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before.

12. Classic: books which people praise, but do not read.

13. Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.

14. Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.

15. Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.

16. Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.

17. Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.

18. Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.

19. Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.

20. Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.

21. Diplomat: A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.

22. Opportunist: A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river.

[priyu_22]

World's easiest quiz


Passing requires only 4 correct
answers....a measly 40%


1) How long did the Hundred Years War last?

2) Which country makes Panama hats?

3) From which animal do we get catgut?

4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution?

5) What is a camel's hair brush made of?

6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific is named after what animal?

7) What was King George VI's first name?

8) What color is a purple finch?

9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from?

10) What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane?


All done?


Check your answers below! Scroll Down




















ANSWERS TO THE QUIZ

1) How long did the Hundred Years War last?
116 years

2) Which country makes Panama hats?
Ecuador

3) From which animal do we get catgut?
Sheep and Horses

4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution?
November

5) What is a camel's hair brush made of?
Squirrel fur

6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific is named after what animal?
Dogs

7) What was King George VI's first name?
Albert

8) What color is a purple finch?
Crimson

9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from?
New Zealand

10) What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane?
Orange, of course.

What do you mean you failed???????

[priyu_22]

1. Cigarette: A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool at the other.

2. Love affairs: Something like cricket where one-day internationals are more popular than a five day test.

3. Marriage: It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master

4. Divorce: Future tense of marriage

5. Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either".
6.
Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

7. Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.

8. Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated by feminine water-power. ..

9. Dictionary: A place where divorce comes before marriage.

10. Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens & everybody disagrees later on.

11. Ecstasy: A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before.

12. Classic: books which people praise, but do not read.

13. Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.

14. Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.

15. Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.

16. Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.

17. Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.

18. Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.

19. Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.

20. Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.

21. Diplomat: A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.

22. Opportunist: A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river.



Hey nice one gurpreet.....

[smruti]

21st Century...

Our communication - Wireless

Our dress - Topless

Our telephone - Cordless

Our cooking - Fireless

Our youth - Jobless

Our food - Fatless

Our labour - Effortless

Our conduct - Worthless

Our relation - Loveless

Our attitude - Careless

Our feelings - Heartless

Our politics - Shameless

Our education - Valueless

Our follies - Countless

Our arguments - Baseless

Our Job - Thankless

Our Salary - Very less



true very true
gud job:D
i cannt send u that fimstars pics:(
the photos have expired:(
sorry:(

[smruti]

hey gr8 wrk priyu and guru

[priyu_22]

true very true
gud job:D
i cannt send u that fimstars pics:(
the photos have expired:(
sorry:(

hey its ok yaaarr

[priyu_22]

hey gr8 wrk priyu and guru


Thnx smruti

[smruti]

hey its ok yaaarr


thanxxx
and sorry again:(

[smruti]

Thnx smruti


u r wecum swetie

[priyu_22]

thanxxx
and sorry again:(


Hey no prob angel

[priyu_22]

hey guys help !! wat 2 do.???:confused:
i created an avatar but it doesn't show !!!!
and i just put few pix for my profile pic still it says dat its 2 much.!!!!!

[priyu_22]

Birth Test

Your birth date describes who we are, what we are good at and what our inborn abilities are. It also points to what we have to learn and the challenges we are facing. To figure out your Birth Number, add all the numbers in the birth date together, like in the example, until there is only one digit.

A Birth Number does not prevent you from being anything you want to be, it will just color your choice differently and give you a little insight.

Example: March 20, 1950

3 + 20 + 1950 = 1973 = 1 + 9 + 7 + 3 = 20 = 2 + 0 = 2

2 is the Birth Number to read for the birth date in the example.


#1 THE ORIGINATOR


#2 THE PEACEMAKER


#3 THE LIFE OF THE PARTY


#4 THE CONSERVATIVE


#5 THE NONCONFORMIST


#6 THE ROMANTIC


#7 THE INTELLECTUAL


#8 THE BIG SHOT


#9 THE PERFORMER

================================================== =========

# 1 - THE ORIGINATOR

1 's are originals. Coming up with new ideas and executing them is natural. Having things their own way is another trait that gets them as being stubborn and arrogant. 1's are extremely honest and do well to learn some diplomacy skills. They like to take the initiative and are often leaders or bosses, as they like to be the best. Being self-employed is definitely helpful for them. Lesson to learn: Others' ideas might be just as good or better and to stay open minded.

Famous 1's: Tom Hanks, Robert Redford, Hulk Hogan, Carol Burnett, Wynona Judd, Nancy Reagan, Raquel Welch, Samuel L. Jackson


#2 - THE PEACEMAKER

2's are the born diplomats. They are aware of others' needs and moods and often think of others before themselves. Naturally analytical and very intuitive they don't like to be alone. Friendship and companionship is very important and can lead them to be successful in life, but on the other hand they'd rather be alone than in an uncomfortable relationship. Being naturally shy they should learn to boost their self-esteem and express themselves freely and seize the moment and not put things off.

Famous 2's: President Bill Clinton, Madonna, Whoopee Goldberg, Thomas Edison, Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, Orlando Bloom, David Beckham


# 3 - THE LIFE OF THE PARTY

3's are idealists. They are very creative, social, charming, romantic, and easygoing. They start many things, but don't always see them through. They like others to be happy and go to great lengths to achieve it. They are very popular and idealistic. They should learn to see the world from a more realistic point of view.
Famous 3's: Alan Alda, Ann Landers, Bill Cosby, Melanie Griffith, Salvador Dali, Jodi Foster, LL Cool J


# 4 - THE CONSERVATIVE

4's are sensible and traditional. They like order and routine. They only act when they fully understand what they are expected to do. They like getting their hands dirty and working hard. They are attracted to the outdoors and feel an affinity with nature. They are prepared to wait and can be stubborn and persistent. They should learn to be more flexible and to be nice to themselves.

Famous 4's: Neil Diamond, Margaret Thatcher, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Tina Turner, Paul Hogan, Oprah Winfrey


# 5 - THE NONCONFORMIST

5's are the expl orers. Their natural curiosity, risk taking, and enthusiasm often land them in hot water. They need diversity, and don't like to be stuck in a rut. The whole world is their school and they see a learning possibility in every situation. The questions never stop. They are well advised to look before they take action and make sure they have all the facts before jumping to conclusions.

Famous 5's: Abraham Lincoln, Charlotte Bronte, Jessica Walter, Vincent Van Gogh, Bette Midler, Helen Keller, Mark Hamil, Colin Farrell, Scott Speedman


# 6 - THE ROMANTIC

6's are idealistic and need to feel useful to be happy. A strong&nbs p;family connection is important to them. Their actions influence their decisions. They have a strong urge to take care of others and to help. They are very loyal and make great teachers. They like art or music. They make loyal friends who take the friendship seriously. 6's should learn to differentiate between what they can change and what they cannot.
Famous 6's: Albert Einstein, Jane Seymour, John Denver, Meryl Streep, Christopher Columbus, Goldie Hawn, Salma Hayek


#7 - THE INTELLECTUAL

7's are the searchers. Always probing for hidden information, they find it difficult to accept things at face value. Emotions don't sway their decisions. Questioning everything in life, they don't like to be questioned themselves. They 're never off to a fast start, and their motto is slow and steady wins the race. They come across as philosophers and being very knowledgeable, and sometimes as loners. They are technically inclined and make great researchers uncovering information. They like secrets. They live in their own world and should learn what is acceptable and what not in the world at large.
Famous 7's: William Shakespeare, Lucille Ball, Joan Baez, Princess Diana, Johnny Depp, Shah Rukh Khan


# 8 - THE BIG SHOT

8's are the problem solvers. They are professional, blunt and to the point, have good judgment and are decisive. They have grand plans and like to live the good life. They take charge of people. They view people obje ctively. They let you know in no uncertain terms that they are the boss. They should learn to exude their decisions on their own needs rather than on what others want.

Famous 8's: Edgar Cayce, Barbra Streisand, George Harrison, Jane Fonda, Pablo Picasso, Aretha Franklin, Nostrodamus, Jack Davenport, Michelle Rodriguez


#9 - THE PERFORMER

9's are natural entertainers. They are very caring and generous, giving away their last dollar to help. With their charm, they have no problem making friends and nobody is a stranger to them. They have so many different personalities that people around them have a hard time understanding them. The y are like chameleons, ever changing and blending in. They have tremendous luck, but also can suffer from extremes in fortune and mood. To be successful, they need to build a loving foundation.
Famous 9's: Albert Schweitzer, Shirley MacLaine, Harrison Ford, Jimmy Carter, Elvis Presley, Rowan Atkinson (Mr Bean!)

[smruti]

Birth Test

Your birth date describes who we are, what we are good at and what our inborn abilities are. It also points to what we have to learn and the challenges we are facing. To figure out your Birth Number, add all the numbers in the birth date together, like in the example, until there is only one digit.

A Birth Number does not prevent you from being anything you want to be, it will just color your choice differently and give you a little insight.

Example: March 20, 1950

3 + 20 + 1950 = 1973 = 1 + 9 + 7 + 3 = 20 = 2 + 0 = 2

2 is the Birth Number to read for the birth date in the example.


#1 THE ORIGINATOR


#2 THE PEACEMAKER


#3 THE LIFE OF THE PARTY


#4 THE CONSERVATIVE


#5 THE NONCONFORMIST


#6 THE ROMANTIC


#7 THE INTELLECTUAL


#8 THE BIG SHOT


#9 THE PERFORMER

================================================== =========

# 1 - THE ORIGINATOR

1 's are originals. Coming up with new ideas and executing them is natural. Having things their own way is another trait that gets them as being stubborn and arrogant. 1's are extremely honest and do well to learn some diplomacy skills. They like to take the initiative and are often leaders or bosses, as they like to be the best. Being self-employed is definitely helpful for them. Lesson to learn: Others' ideas might be just as good or better and to stay open minded.

Famous 1's: Tom Hanks, Robert Redford, Hulk Hogan, Carol Burnett, Wynona Judd, Nancy Reagan, Raquel Welch, Samuel L. Jackson


#2 - THE PEACEMAKER

2's are the born diplomats. They are aware of others' needs and moods and often think of others before themselves. Naturally analytical and very intuitive they don't like to be alone. Friendship and companionship is very important and can lead them to be successful in life, but on the other hand they'd rather be alone than in an uncomfortable relationship. Being naturally shy they should learn to boost their self-esteem and express themselves freely and seize the moment and not put things off.

Famous 2's: President Bill Clinton, Madonna, Whoopee Goldberg, Thomas Edison, Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, Orlando Bloom, David Beckham


# 3 - THE LIFE OF THE PARTY

3's are idealists. They are very creative, social, charming, romantic, and easygoing. They start many things, but don't always see them through. They like others to be happy and go to great lengths to achieve it. They are very popular and idealistic. They should learn to see the world from a more realistic point of view.
Famous 3's: Alan Alda, Ann Landers, Bill Cosby, Melanie Griffith, Salvador Dali, Jodi Foster, LL Cool J


# 4 - THE CONSERVATIVE

4's are sensible and traditional. They like order and routine. They only act when they fully understand what they are expected to do. They like getting their hands dirty and working hard. They are attracted to the outdoors and feel an affinity with nature. They are prepared to wait and can be stubborn and persistent. They should learn to be more flexible and to be nice to themselves.

Famous 4's: Neil Diamond, Margaret Thatcher, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Tina Turner, Paul Hogan, Oprah Winfrey


# 5 - THE NONCONFORMIST

5's are the expl orers. Their natural curiosity, risk taking, and enthusiasm often land them in hot water. They need diversity, and don't like to be stuck in a rut. The whole world is their school and they see a learning possibility in every situation. The questions never stop. They are well advised to look before they take action and make sure they have all the facts before jumping to conclusions.

Famous 5's: Abraham Lincoln, Charlotte Bronte, Jessica Walter, Vincent Van Gogh, Bette Midler, Helen Keller, Mark Hamil, Colin Farrell, Scott Speedman


# 6 - THE ROMANTIC

6's are idealistic and need to feel useful to be happy. A strong&nbs p;family connection is important to them. Their actions influence their decisions. They have a strong urge to take care of others and to help. They are very loyal and make great teachers. They like art or music. They make loyal friends who take the friendship seriously. 6's should learn to differentiate between what they can change and what they cannot.
Famous 6's: Albert Einstein, Jane Seymour, John Denver, Meryl Streep, Christopher Columbus, Goldie Hawn, Salma Hayek


#7 - THE INTELLECTUAL

7's are the searchers. Always probing for hidden information, they find it difficult to accept things at face value. Emotions don't sway their decisions. Questioning everything in life, they don't like to be questioned themselves. They 're never off to a fast start, and their motto is slow and steady wins the race. They come across as philosophers and being very knowledgeable, and sometimes as loners. They are technically inclined and make great researchers uncovering information. They like secrets. They live in their own world and should learn what is acceptable and what not in the world at large.
Famous 7's: William Shakespeare, Lucille Ball, Joan Baez, Princess Diana, Johnny Depp, Shah Rukh Khan


# 8 - THE BIG SHOT

8's are the problem solvers. They are professional, blunt and to the point, have good judgment and are decisive. They have grand plans and like to live the good life. They take charge of people. They view people obje ctively. They let you know in no uncertain terms that they are the boss. They should learn to exude their decisions on their own needs rather than on what others want.

Famous 8's: Edgar Cayce, Barbra Streisand, George Harrison, Jane Fonda, Pablo Picasso, Aretha Franklin, Nostrodamus, Jack Davenport, Michelle Rodriguez


#9 - THE PERFORMER

9's are natural entertainers. They are very caring and generous, giving away their last dollar to help. With their charm, they have no problem making friends and nobody is a stranger to them. They have so many different personalities that people around them have a hard time understanding them. The y are like chameleons, ever changing and blending in. They have tremendous luck, but also can suffer from extremes in fortune and mood. To be successful, they need to build a loving foundation.
Famous 9's: Albert Schweitzer, Shirley MacLaine, Harrison Ford, Jimmy Carter, Elvis Presley, Rowan Atkinson (Mr Bean!)












cool post priyu;)

[priyu_22]

cool post priyu;)


thaaannnxxx!! angel

[priyu_22]

PPL PLZ HELP ME

I CREATED AN AVATAR AND A PROGILE PIC. BUT IT DOESN'T SHOW !!! WAT TO DO ???:( :confused:

[guru_sal]

An elephant has 5 bananas and it is hungry, but yet it does not eat the bananas. Why ?

.
.
.
.
.
.
.

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

.
.
.
.
.
.
.

.
.
.
.
.
.




Because the bananas are made of plastic.

Next…Q





The 5 bananas are real , but yet the elephant does not eat it. Why?

.
.

.
.
.
.
.
.
.

.
.
.

.
.
.

.
.
.
.
Because the elephant is made of plastic.

Hahhaa…never give up…one more..




Both the elephant and the bananas are real, but yet it cannot eat it.
.
.
.
.

.
.

Why ?

.
.
.
.

.
.
.
.

.
.
.
.

.
.
.
.
.
.

Because the bananas are in the TV.

Ooops!!! Cool down…





Both the elephant and the bananas are real and in the TV, but yet it cannot eat it. Why?


.
.
.
.

.
.
.
.
,
,
,

,
,
,
,
,.
.
.
.

.
.
.

Because they are on different channels.

Hohohohoohohoh. .hehehe




Both the elephant and the bananas are real and in the TV and on the
same channel, but yet it cannot eat it. Why?
.
.
.
.
.

.
.
.
.
.

.
.
.
.
.
.


.
.
.
.
.
Cmon think !!!!
.
.
.
..
.
.
.

.
.
.
.
.

.
.
.
.
.
.

.
.
.

.
.
.
.

.
.
.
.

.
.
.

Because the TV is off.

Kikikikikiki J


Now Finally the Elephant gets a chance to eat the bananas.Why?
















































Itna kyun soch rahe ho yaar...Kya bigada hain usne aapka...Khane do
naa bechare ko!!!

__________________

[smruti]

thaaannnxxx!! angel


u r welcum swetie

[smruti]

PPL PLZ HELP ME

I CREATED AN AVATAR AND A PROGILE PIC. BUT IT DOESN'T SHOW !!! WAT TO DO ???:( :confused:

no idea
sorry againn:(

[juhirocks!!]

An elephant has 5 bananas and it is hungry, but yet it does not eat the bananas. Why ?

.
.
.
.
.
.
.

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

.
.
.
.
.
.
.

.
.
.
.
.
.




Because the bananas are made of plastic.

Next…Q





The 5 bananas are real , but yet the elephant does not eat it. Why?

.
.

.
.
.
.
.
.
.

.
.
.

.
.
.

.
.
.
.
Because the elephant is made of plastic.

Hahhaa…never give up…one more..




Both the elephant and the bananas are real, but yet it cannot eat it.
.
.
.
.

.
.

Why ?

.
.
.
.

.
.
.
.

.
.
.
.

.
.
.
.
.
.

Because the bananas are in the TV.

Ooops!!! Cool down…





Both the elephant and the bananas are real and in the TV, but yet it cannot eat it. Why?


.
.
.
.

.
.
.
.
,
,
,

,
,
,
,
,.
.
.
.

.
.
.

Because they are on different channels.

Hohohohoohohoh. .hehehe




Both the elephant and the bananas are real and in the TV and on the
same channel, but yet it cannot eat it. Why?
.
.
.
.
.

.
.
.
.
.

.
.
.
.
.
.


.
.
.
.
.
Cmon think !!!!
.
.
.
..
.
.
.

.
.
.
.
.

.
.
.
.
.
.

.
.
.

.
.
.
.

.
.
.
.

.
.
.

Because the TV is off.

Kikikikikiki J


Now Finally the Elephant gets a chance to eat the bananas.Why?
















































Itna kyun soch rahe ho yaar...Kya bigada hain usne aapka...Khane do
naa bechare ko!!!

__________________

hey bhaggu guru!!!:D
that's really funny! lol

[guru_sal]

hey bhaggu guru!!!:D
that's really funny! lol
thankx a lot juhi

[glamour_jiya]

guys to gud every1 even i have some now


Hve u seen the Gandhi version in bollywood nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

then here it is ok.

Ajay Devgan as gandhi

http://i83.photobucket.com/albums/j290/glamour_jiya/AjayDevganGandhi.jpg

abhi shek Bacchan as Gandhi

http://i83.photobucket.com/albums/j290/glamour_jiya/AbhishekBachanGandhi.jpg

Amir Khan as Gandhi

http://i83.photobucket.com/albums/j290/glamour_jiya/AamirkhanGandhi.jpg

[glamour_jiya]

Do u want to see fantastic Love story.

http://i83.photobucket.com/albums/j290/glamour_jiya/WhatALoveStory.jpg

[guru_sal]

Do u want to see fantastic Love story.

http://i83.photobucket.com/albums/j290/glamour_jiya/WhatALoveStory.jpg
hey its too gud jiya

[juhirocks!!]

gud 1s jiya!!:D

[glamour_jiya]

hey its too gud jiya


thank uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu:D :p :rolleyes:

[glamour_jiya]

gud 1s jiya!!:D

thank uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu:cool: :D

[smruti]

gud one jiya

[tukz]

gud ones....jiya....

[Bhumika]

cooooooooolllllllllll jiya!~!

[smruti]

E-mail ID's of our cricketers

1 LAXMAN: available@home-only.com


2 KUMBLE: only@test_match.com


3 SACHIN: admitted@hospital.com


4 KAIF: good@for_nothing.com


5 SEHWAG: consistently@ out_of_form.com


6 DRAVID: stick@crease_like_fevicol.com


7 PATHAN: takewickets@only_with_ kenya.com


8 GREG CHAPPELL: only_experiment@noresult.com


9 Munaf Patel: only_line&length@nospeed.com


10 Harbhajan Singh: no_spinpitch@nowicket.com


11 Suresh Raina: why_i_am_there@ god_knows.com

[juhirocks!!]

E-mail ID's of our cricketers

1 LAXMAN: available@home-only.com


2 KUMBLE: only@test_match.com


3 SACHIN: admitted@hospital.com


4 KAIF: good@for_nothing.com


5 SEHWAG: consistently@ out_of_form.com


6 DRAVID: stick@crease_like_fevicol.com


7 PATHAN: takewickets@only_with_ kenya.com


8 GREG CHAPPELL: only_experiment@noresult.com


9 Munaf Patel: only_line&length@nospeed.com


10 Harbhajan Singh: no_spinpitch@nowicket.com


11 Suresh Raina: why_i_am_there@ god_knows.com

:D lol! gud work smruti!!

[shubha63]

A father passing by his teenage daughter's bedroom was astonished to
see the bed was nicely made and everything was neat and tidy.
Then he saw an envelope propped up prominently on the centre of the
pillow. It was addressed "Dad". With the worst premonition, he opened
the
envelope and read the letter with trembling hands:-


Dear Dad,

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you, but I'm
leaving home. I had to elope with my new boyfriend Randy because I
wanted to
avoid a scene with Mom and you.
I've been finding real passion with Randy and he is so nice to me. I
know when you meet him you'll like him too - even with all his
piercing,
tattoos, and motorcycle clothes. But it's not only the passion Dad, I'm
pregnant and Randy said that he wants me to have the kid and that we
can be very happy together.

Randy has a great CD collection; he already owns a trailer in the woods
and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. It's true he has
other girlfriends as well but I know he'll be faithful to me in his own
way. He wants to have many more children with me and that's now one of
my
dreams too.
Randy taught me that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone and he'll be
growing it for us and we'll trade it with our friends for all the
cocaine and ecstasy we want. In the meantime, we'll pray that science
will
find a cure for AIDS so Randy can get better; he sure deserves it!!
Don't worry Dad, I'm 15 years old now and I know how to take care of
myself. Someday I'm sure we'll be back to visit so you can get to know
your grandchildren.
Your loving daughter, At the bottom of the page were the letters "" PTO".

Hands still trembling, her father turned the sheet, and read:
Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at the neighbour's house.i
just wanted to remind u tht there r worse thngs thn my report card
tht's
in my desk cente.plz sign it and call when it is safe for me to cme
hme.
i love you
ur loving daughter
rossie

[juhirocks!!]

U think u r smart? Take this little quiz and find out

1)how many years did the hundred year war last?
a) 99 b)116 c) 100 d)150



2)panama hat is made in wich country?
a) brazil b)chile c) ikuador d) panama


3)the famous October revolution of Russia is celebrated in wich month of the year?

a) oct b)nov c)july d) jan


4)what’s the first name of king george vi?

a)Alfred b) albert c) george d) Michael


5) the name of canary islands in pacific ocean is named after wich bird or animal ?

a) canary b) kangaroo c) puppy d) mouse







Done??
Ok, ur answers must b this:

1) 100
2) panama
3) oct
4) george
5) canary




but, r u sure that u r rite???????????????/


NO, U R WRONG
COS, THE CORRECT ANSWERS AND JUSTIFICATIONS ARE:

1) 100 yrs war actually lasted 4 116 yrs


2)panama hat is actually made in ikuador


3)October revolution in Russia is in fact celebrated in November


4) king george’s first name is albert


5)canary islands r named after inslanaria canaria wich is latin for puppy


so….
Kya aap ab bhi sochte hai ki aap smart hai?

[shubha63]

hey gud work juhi

[shubha63]

A lady approaches a priest and tells him, “Father, I have a problem. I have these two talking female parrots, but they only know how to say one thing. They keep saying “Hi, we’re hot. Do you want a date?”



“That’s terrible!” the priest exclaimed. “But I do have a solution to your problem. Bring your two parrots over to my house and I will put them with my two male talking parrots to whom I have taught to pray and read the bible.



My parrots will then teach your parrots to stop saying that terrible phrase, and your female parrots will learn to pray and worship.”



So the next day, the lady brings her female parrots to the priest’s house.



The priest’s two male parrots are holding rosary beads and praying in their cage. The lady puts her female talking parrots in with the male talking Parrots, and the female parrots say, “Hi, we’re hot. Do you want a date?”



One male parrot looks over at the other male parrot and screams, “Put your Bible away Idiot, our prayers have been answered!!!!!!!”

[smruti]

U think u r smart? Take this little quiz and find out

1)how many years did the hundred year war last?
a) 99 b)116 c) 100 d)150



2)panama hat is made in wich country?
a) brazil b)chile c) ikuador d) panama


3)the famous October revolution of Russia is celebrated in wich month of the year?

a) oct b)nov c)july d) jan


4)what’s the first name of king george vi?

a)Alfred b) albert c) george d) Michael


5) the name of canary islands in pacific ocean is named after wich bird or animal ?

a) canary b) kangaroo c) puppy d) mouse







Done??
Ok, ur answers must b this:

1) 100
2) panama
3) oct
4) george
5) canary




but, r u sure that u r rite???????????????/


NO, U R WRONG
COS, THE CORRECT ANSWERS AND JUSTIFICATIONS ARE:

1) 100 yrs war actually lasted 4 116 yrs


2)panama hat is actually made in ikuador


3)October revolution in Russia is in fact celebrated in November


4) king george’s first name is albert


5)canary islands r named after inslanaria canaria wich is latin for puppy


so….
Kya aap ab bhi sochte hai ki aap smart hai?


gud one ....

[smruti]

A lady approaches a priest and tells him, “Father, I have a problem. I have these two talking female parrots, but they only know how to say one thing. They keep saying “Hi, we’re hot. Do you want a date?”



“That’s terrible!” the priest exclaimed. “But I do have a solution to your problem. Bring your two parrots over to my house and I will put them with my two male talking parrots to whom I have taught to pray and read the bible.



My parrots will then teach your parrots to stop saying that terrible phrase, and your female parrots will learn to pray and worship.”



So the next day, the lady brings her female parrots to the priest’s house.



The priest’s two male parrots are holding rosary beads and praying in their cage. The lady puts her female talking parrots in with the male talking Parrots, and the female parrots say, “Hi, we’re hot. Do you want a date?”



One male parrot looks over at the other male parrot and screams, “Put your Bible away Idiot, our prayers have been answered!!!!!!!”






hahah gr8one

[guru_sal]

gr8 work everyone

[shubha63]

hey thanx every1

[guru_sal]

hey thanx every1
yr most welcum shubha

[glamour_jiya]

hey guru belated happy birthday i saw in member database

[juhirocks!!]

A lady approaches a priest and tells him, “Father, I have a problem. I have these two talking female parrots, but they only know how to say one thing. They keep saying “Hi, we’re hot. Do you want a date?”



“That’s terrible!” the priest exclaimed. “But I do have a solution to your problem. Bring your two parrots over to my house and I will put them with my two male talking parrots to whom I have taught to pray and read the bible.



My parrots will then teach your parrots to stop saying that terrible phrase, and your female parrots will learn to pray and worship.”



So the next day, the lady brings her female parrots to the priest’s house.



The priest’s two male parrots are holding rosary beads and praying in their cage. The lady puts her female talking parrots in with the male talking Parrots, and the female parrots say, “Hi, we’re hot. Do you want a date?”



One male parrot looks over at the other male parrot and screams, “Put your Bible away Idiot, our prayers have been answered!!!!!!!”
ha! ha! ha!
really funny shubha!, i enjoyed it:D

[smruti]

In some remote village of India, one masterji is teaching the Mahabharata
katha to class 6 students.
He is at the 'krishna janma' part of it.
Masterji: "Kansa heard the akashwani that his sister's 8th child is going to kill him.
He was furious. He ordered to put vasudev n devki Behind the bars.
First son is born, and kansa kills him by poisoning...
Second one is born n kansa throws him off the mountain peak. Third one is born...
" Now Ramu, who is smartest of the lot, puts up his hand. Masterji,
have a doubt (sounding nervous n confused)
Masterji: "Ramu bete, whole india does not have doubt in Mahabharata then how come u have one?"
Ramu : Masterji, if Kansa knew that Devaki's 8th child was going to Kill him,
WHY THE HELL DID HE PUT VASUDEV AND DEVAKI IN THE SAME CELL?

[shubha63]

In some remote village of India, one masterji is teaching the Mahabharata
katha to class 6 students.
He is at the 'krishna janma' part of it.
Masterji: "Kansa heard the akashwani that his sister's 8th child is going to kill him.
He was furious. He ordered to put vasudev n devki Behind the bars.
First son is born, and kansa kills him by poisoning...
Second one is born n kansa throws him off the mountain peak. Third one is born...
" Now Ramu, who is smartest of the lot, puts up his hand. Masterji,
have a doubt (sounding nervous n confused)
Masterji: "Ramu bete, whole india does not have doubt in Mahabharata then how come u have one?"
Ramu : Masterji, if Kansa knew that Devaki's 8th child was going to Kill him,
WHY THE HELL DID HE PUT VASUDEV AND DEVAKI IN THE SAME CELL?
hey cool one

[shubha63]

1. At the movies: When you meet acquaintances/friends... Stupid Question: Hey, what are you doing here?
Answer: Don't u know, I sell tickets in black over here.

2. In the bus: A heavy lady wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on your feet...
Stupid Question: Sorry, did that hurt?
Answer: No, not at all, I'm on local anesthesia. Why don't you try again?

3. At a funeral: One of the teary eyed people ask...
Stupid Question: Why, why him, of all people.
Answer: Why? Would it rather have been you?

4. At a restaurant: When you ask the waiter
Stupid Question: Is the "Paneer Butter Masala" dish good?
Answer: No, it's terrible and made of adulterated cement. We occasionally also spit on it.

5. At a family get-together: When some distant aunt meets you after years.
Stupid Question: Munna, Chickoo, you've become so big.
Answer: Well you haven't particularly shrunk yourself.

6. When a friend announces her wedding, and you ask...
Stupid Question: Is the guy you're marrying well?
Answer: No, he's a miserable wife beating, insensitive lout...it's just the money.

7. When you get woken up at midnight by a phone call...
Stupid Question: Sorry. Were you sleeping?
Answer: No. I was doing research on whether the Zulu tribes in Africa marry or not.

And you thought I was sleeping.... You dumb witted moron.
8. When you see a friend/colleague with evidently shorter hair...
Stupid Question: Hey have you had a haircut?
Answer: No, its autumn and I'm shedding.

9.At the dentist when he's sticking pointed objects in your mouth...
Stupid Question: Tell me if it hurts?
Answer: No it won't. It will just bleed.

10. You are smoking a cigarette and a cute woman asks...
Stupid Question: Oh, so you smoke.
Answer: Gosh, it's a miracle ...it was a piece of chalk and now it's in flames!

[guru_sal]

gr8 work shubha n smruti

[juhirocks!!]

1. At the movies: When you meet acquaintances/friends... Stupid Question: Hey, what are you doing here?
Answer: Don't u know, I sell tickets in black over here.

2. In the bus: A heavy lady wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on your feet...
Stupid Question: Sorry, did that hurt?
Answer: No, not at all, I'm on local anesthesia. Why don't you try again?

3. At a funeral: One of the teary eyed people ask...
Stupid Question: Why, why him, of all people.
Answer: Why? Would it rather have been you?

4. At a restaurant: When you ask the waiter
Stupid Question: Is the "Paneer Butter Masala" dish good?
Answer: No, it's terrible and made of adulterated cement. We occasionally also spit on it.

5. At a family get-together: When some distant aunt meets you after years.
Stupid Question: Munna, Chickoo, you've become so big.
Answer: Well you haven't particularly shrunk yourself.

6. When a friend announces her wedding, and you ask...
Stupid Question: Is the guy you're marrying well?
Answer: No, he's a miserable wife beating, insensitive lout...it's just the money.

7. When you get woken up at midnight by a phone call...
Stupid Question: Sorry. Were you sleeping?
Answer: No. I was doing research on whether the Zulu tribes in Africa marry or not.

And you thought I was sleeping.... You dumb witted moron.
8. When you see a friend/colleague with evidently shorter hair...
Stupid Question: Hey have you had a haircut?
Answer: No, its autumn and I'm shedding.

9.At the dentist when he's sticking pointed objects in your mouth...
Stupid Question: Tell me if it hurts?
Answer: No it won't. It will just bleed.

10. You are smoking a cigarette and a cute woman asks...
Stupid Question: Oh, so you smoke.
Answer: Gosh, it's a miracle ...it was a piece of chalk and now it's in flames!
hey shubha, nice1

[smruti]

A MBA Recurit's Diary

Dear Diary,

I can't hold myself down. My FIRST day on the job!! And I like it already.

"Assistant Junior Deputy to the Vice Chairman - Manufacturing". My dad was thrilled when he heard my designation.

"What the f!@#!!!" were his exact words. Oh I love it when my parents are happy...

Need to meet HR in half an hour. I can't wait to get my first Employee ID Card and cubicle. I hope Parthasarathy Whatayblouse Crappers (PWC) is the beginning of great things.

P.S. I have brought my favorite textbooks back from the institute OD, OM and HR should help me grow rapidly in the organization. And I WILL handle soft issues before facing hard issues here at PWC.



July 28th

Dear Diary,

Had a lot of fun with HR yesterday. The guy who had recruited me had left a month ago. So they didn't know I was joining. We had a hearty laugh over that one.

I'll get my cubicle in a few days time. For the time being I am sharing a nice one with Claire. She's with Corporate Communication. The phone doesn't work though...



August 2nd

Dear Diary,

Met my boss today. He spent a lot of time with my CV and then asked me how I managed to get a job with them. (Even he knows how lucky they are to get me..) He told me to review our material ordering system in the err... umm... the... the "big yellow and blue noisy machine section" of the plant.

Claire is working on an "Our Employees Love Us" campaign. The office boy had just resigned. So she got me to pose with an apron and a tray of cookies for a photo. They are going to call me Ramon and use it for ads. I am going to be famous.



August 7th

Dear Diary,

My first breakthrough. I have decided to order nickel ball bearings using the EQO.. QEO... whatever formula. It takes into account item cost, holding cost and weight of ball bearing I think. The purchase guy gave me a funny look when he saw my annual requisition contract form. He is obviously not an MBA...


Claire resigned today. She told me carry on with the "Our Employees Love Us" campaign.

P.S. Lesson for the week. You cannot order 0.7564 of a ball bearing. It has to be in whole numbers.



August 11th

Dear Diary,

I just got a shipment of 4384 ball bearings. I checked up with Engineering.

They said that should be enough for around 14 years of requirement. I gave them 3 and stashed away the rest in a cupboard in my room. If prices of ball bearings go up, I see a lot of potential savings.

I have decided to develop informal channels of communication. From tomorrow I will spend a little time next to the coffee machine to understand the unspoken messages within the underbelly of the firm.

(That OD book is good)



August 14th

Dear Diary,

I sent my first official letter today. It was to our Facilities manager Merry Le Bian. She is a hottie. I told her that the Coffee Machine takes too much time to reheat between refills. Wrote it in a WAC format and all with a table of contents and everything. She is sure going to be impressed!! I spell checked it in MS word and emailed it to her an hour ago. No reply yet.


They scrapped the "Our Employees Love Us" campaign. The photo shoot was taking up too much time, and people were being forced to stay late without extra pay. Someone finally went and vandalised the banner. It now reads "Our Employers Shove Us". I offered to model for all the snaps and videos. They called me a dickhead. I was delighted. Dickhead is internal slang for "Big Stud". HR told me. Everyone calls me that...

P.S. One more shipment of ball bearings came. Again 4384. The contract can't be changed now. I dont have too much space left in my cupboard.



August 25th

Dear Diary,

My letter came back. It had a pink post-it on it from Merry. "Please proofread" it said. It was CC'd to my boss. How was I supposed to know MS Word would spell check her name and change it to Merry Lesbian????!!!!

Where's natural justice?

Today five minutes before a meeting the cupboard door broke open. It took me ten minutes to pick up all the ball bearings from the floor. I had to run to the board room for the meeting and slipped on a bearing which rolled under the door. I fell on the coffee machine and tipped coffee powder into the polymer mixing matching tray. No one saw anything.



September 2nd

Dear Diary,

My boss told me I may not last the probation period. I was mighty thrilled to hear that. Imagine!! Permanent in less than three months!!

That should be some sort of company record.

I made a presentation to all the staff yesterday. Some 300 people were there. I think I sent good vibes. Everyone was smiling and nodding their heads during the presentation. Someone later told me my fly was open the whole time. But I don't think anyone noticed. The presentation was on "An Open Culture: Let the feeling show!!"

p.s. 17156 ball bearings. I floated a scheme to give each employee a ball bearing for every year of service. The HR manager immediately convened a meeting with my boss. Every suggestion counts here at PWC.


September 4th

Dear Diary,

I have been transferred to the office in Sub-Saharan Africa . I will be heading the Room Heater and Hot Water Geyser products division. They have also told me to pay for all the ball bearings I bought. I think it speaks much of the entrepreneurial spirit. I have been told to leave immediately for Kujumbinana.

P.S. A foreign posting in under a year!!!


September 5th

Dear Diary,

I am in Kujumbinana. We don't have a branch here....

[shubha63]

thanx juhi n guru.
good work smruti

[shubha63]

Things aren't always what they seem


Two traveling angels stopped to spend the night in the home of a wealthy family.


The family was rude and refused to let the angels stay in the mansion's guest room. Instead the angels were given a space in the cold basement.


As they made their bed on the hard floor, the older angel saw a hole in the wall and repaired it. When the younger angel asked why, the older angel replied... " Things aren't always what they seem".


The next night the pair came to rest at the house of a very poor, but very hospitable farmer and his wife.


After sharing what little food they had the couple let the angels sleep in their bed where they could have a good night's rest. When the sun came up the next morning the angels found the farmer and his wife in tears. Their only cow, whose milk had been their sole income, lay dead in the field.


The younger angel was infuriated and asked the older angel "how could you have let this happen!? The first man had everything, yet you helped him," she accused. "The second family had little but was willing to share everything, and you let their cow die."


"Things aren't always what they seem," the older angel replied. "When we stayed in the basement of the mansion, I noticed there was gold stored in that hole in the wall.


Since the owner was so obsessed with greed and unwilling to share his good fortune, I sealed the wall so he wouldn't find it. Then last night as we slept in the farmers bed, the angel of death came for his wife. I gave her the cow instead. Things aren't always what they seem."


Sometimes this is exactly what happens when things don't turn out the way they should. If you have faith, you just need to trust that every outcome is always to your advantage. You might not know it until some time later.

[juhirocks!!]

An 80 yr old couple had a disease of forgetfulness.they approached a doc, who advised them 2 rite down each n every thing, so that they cannot forget it

Then, 1 evening………

Husband was watching tv. The wife got up 2 go in the kitchen .he told his wife 2 bring him a cup of tea

Husband- rite it down, u’ll forget it
Wife- I wont forget a thing like tea. I m not as forgetful as u
Husband- make sure 2 add ginger in it.
rite it down
Wife- I ‘ll remember it.
Husband- bring cookies wid the tea.
rite it down
Wife- uhh! Will u stop that? I CAN REMEMBER SIMPLE THINGS LIKE THAT

The wife came back frm the kitchen sum 20 min later, bringing a plate of salad

Husband(angrily)- I told u 2 rite it down.see now! U brought salad, instead of my pastries!!

[guru_sal]

u guyz rokkkkk
gr8 work

[smruti]

u guyz rokkkkk
gr8 work


thank u.....

[guru_sal]

Guzre hue kal ki yaad aati hai,
kuch lamho se ankhen bhar aati hai,
woh subah rangeen,woh shaam nirali jaati hai,
jab aap jaise dosto ki yaad aati hai.

Teri dosti ki roshni aisi hai
ke har taraf ujala nazar aata hai...
sochta hun ki bijli katva lu..
aajkal kambakhat bill bahot aata hai.



Nazar hamhari
Nazar tumhari
Nazar ne dil ki Nazar utaari..
Nazar ne dekha Nazar ko aise..
ke Nazar na lage "DOSTI" ko hamari.

Kuch Log Khaas Hote Hain,
Har Pal Paas Hoten Hain,
Khushiyon Mein Shaamil Hote Hain,
Aur Gam Mein Bhi Saath Rehate Hain,
Log unhe DOST aur hum unhe AAP Kehate hain.

[smruti]

Guzre hue kal ki yaad aati hai,
kuch lamho se ankhen bhar aati hai,
woh subah rangeen,woh shaam nirali jaati hai,
jab aap jaise dosto ki yaad aati hai.

Teri dosti ki roshni aisi hai
ke har taraf ujala nazar aata hai...
sochta hun ki bijli katva lu..
aajkal kambakhat bill bahot aata hai.



Nazar hamhari
Nazar tumhari
Nazar ne dil ki Nazar utaari..
Nazar ne dekha Nazar ko aise..
ke Nazar na lage "DOSTI" ko hamari.

Kuch Log Khaas Hote Hain,
Har Pal Paas Hoten Hain,
Khushiyon Mein Shaamil Hote Hain,
Aur Gam Mein Bhi Saath Rehate Hain,
Log unhe DOST aur hum unhe AAP Kehate hain.


sweetttttt

[guru_sal]

thank u.....
yr most welcum

[guru_sal]

sweetttttt
thankuuuuuuuu

[smruti]

thankuuuuuuuu

welcomeeeee

[juhirocks!!]

Guzre hue kal ki yaad aati hai,
kuch lamho se ankhen bhar aati hai,
woh subah rangeen,woh shaam nirali jaati hai,
jab aap jaise dosto ki yaad aati hai.

Teri dosti ki roshni aisi hai
ke har taraf ujala nazar aata hai...
sochta hun ki bijli katva lu..
aajkal kambakhat bill bahot aata hai.



Nazar hamhari
Nazar tumhari
Nazar ne dil ki Nazar utaari..
Nazar ne dekha Nazar ko aise..
ke Nazar na lage "DOSTI" ko hamari.

Kuch Log Khaas Hote Hain,
Har Pal Paas Hoten Hain,
Khushiyon Mein Shaamil Hote Hain,
Aur Gam Mein Bhi Saath Rehate Hain,
Log unhe DOST aur hum unhe AAP Kehate hain.

hey guru, really cute

[guru_sal]

hey guru, really cute
thankx alot

[juhirocks!!]

thankx alot
u r welcum

[guru_sal]

Dil koi aaina nahin jo tootne par awaaz karta hai
Yeh to hai us phool jaisa jo murjhane par uff tak nahin karta

Phool ko dar hai murjha Jaane ka,
Pathar ko dar hai thukra Jaane ka,
Mein aankhen isliye nahin kholta,
Mujhe dar hai sapnon ke toot Jaane ka.

Teri Aankhon mein koi karishma zaroor hai
Tu jise dekh le woh tarapta zaroor hai

Chand se haseen hai chandni
Chandni se haseen hai Raat
Raat se haseen hai Chand
Aur chand se haseen hai Aap

uskiYaad mein har pal Itna jala jata hoon
Log khud ko jalate hain
Mein Dil ko jalata hoon

Tumne dil ko kya chuwa, Dhadkan Machal Gayi
Humne Tumko ko kya chuwa, Humari Ruh Machal Gayi