Fun 'n' Masti!!!!

[guru_sal]

Thankz Ash......

[tukz]

hey guru kul ones

[guru_sal]

hey guru kul ones
thankz a lot

[tukz]

thankz a lot
ur mst welcum

[tukz]

> >Once upon a time, a Sardar applied to Medical School.
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >Needless to say, he never made
>it... do you wanna know why ????
> >
> >
> >
> >These are the answers he gave ...
> >
> >
> >
> >ANTIBODY - against everyone
> >
> >ARTERY - the study of fine paintings
> >
> >BACTERIA - back door to a cafeteria
> >
> >COMA - punctuation mark
> >
> >DIAGNOSIS - person with a slanted nose
> >
> >DILATE - the late British princess
> >
> >GALLBLA! DDER - bladder in a girl
> >
> >GENES - blue denim
> >
> >HERNIA - she is close by
> >
> >HYMEN - greeting to several males
> >
> >IMPOTENT - distinguished, well-known
> >
> >LABOR PAIN - hurt at work
> >
> >LACTOSE - person without digits on the foot
> >
> >LIPOSUCTION - a French kiss
> >
> >LYMPH - walk unsteadily
> >
> >MICROBES - small dressing gowns
> >
> >OBESITY - city of
>Obe
> >
> >SECRETION - hiding anything
> >
> >TABLET - small table
> >
> >ULTRASOUND - radical noise
> >
> >CAESARIAN SECTION - a district in Rome
> >
> >CARDIOLOGY - advanced study of playing cards
> >
> >CAT SCAN - searching for lost kitty
> >
> >CHRONIC - neck of a crow
>
>How good are you in a Formula One car? Play now

[tukz]

The Story So Far…
Santa Singh has answered 12 out of the 15 questions correct and has used all his lifelines except for "50-50" and "Phone a Friend". Santa Singh is playing the 13 th Question now which is for 25 Lacs. Let's see what happens next… J

Amitabh Bachchan: Apka 13th question 25 lakh ke liye, yeh raha aapke saamne aapki Computer Screen par…
Santa Singh gets Tense…

Amitabh Bachchan: Who is the father of Abhishek Bachchan? Your options are…





Amitabh Bachchan: To Santa Singh Jee kya Jawaab hai aapka? [He's quite sure that Santa will opt for option A]
But Santa is surprisingly still confused…
Amitabh Bachchan: Aapke paas abhi bhi do life line baaki hai… 50-50 and phone a friend. Agar aap chahe to unhe use kar sakte hain. Wo aap hi ke liye banaayi gayee hai.
Santa Singh: I think it is A, but I'm not sure.
Amitabh Bachchan: Not sure, Hmmm… Aap kya karna chahenge?
Santa Singh: I would like to use 50-50…
Amitabh Bachchan: Ok Computer Jee, Kripya 2 galat javab mita deejiye…

Computer deletes two names, and leaves the following options:







Now Amitabh Bachchan gets confused and worriedly thinks if the Computer is actually right or has got some bug!. Santa Singh gets all the more Confused after the 50-50 Lifeline…
Santa Singh: I would like to use my last life line too - Phone A Friend…
Amitabh Bachchan: Aap kisse baat karna chahenge!?
Santa Singh: Main aapki Misej [Mrs.] Jaya Bachan Ji ko phone karna chahoonga...

Amitabh Bachchan Faints !!! But the Call gets connected to Jaya Bachchan [Thanks to AirTel J]…

Santa Singh: "Jayaji, Who is the father of Abhishek Bachchan!?"
Jaya Bachchan: What are the options !?!?

Hearing this Santa Singh faints too…

[guru_sal]

gud work tukz

[divyaashimix]

The Story So Far…
Santa Singh has answered 12 out of the 15 questions correct and has used all his lifelines except for "50-50" and "Phone a Friend". Santa Singh is playing the 13 th Question now which is for 25 Lacs. Let's see what happens next… J

Amitabh Bachchan: Apka 13th question 25 lakh ke liye, yeh raha aapke saamne aapki Computer Screen par…
Santa Singh gets Tense…

Amitabh Bachchan: Who is the father of Abhishek Bachchan? Your options are…





Amitabh Bachchan: To Santa Singh Jee kya Jawaab hai aapka? [He's quite sure that Santa will opt for option A]
But Santa is surprisingly still confused…
Amitabh Bachchan: Aapke paas abhi bhi do life line baaki hai… 50-50 and phone a friend. Agar aap chahe to unhe use kar sakte hain. Wo aap hi ke liye banaayi gayee hai.
Santa Singh: I think it is A, but I'm not sure.
Amitabh Bachchan: Not sure, Hmmm… Aap kya karna chahenge?
Santa Singh: I would like to use 50-50…
Amitabh Bachchan: Ok Computer Jee, Kripya 2 galat javab mita deejiye…

Computer deletes two names, and leaves the following options:







Now Amitabh Bachchan gets confused and worriedly thinks if the Computer is actually right or has got some bug!. Santa Singh gets all the more Confused after the 50-50 Lifeline…
Santa Singh: I would like to use my last life line too - Phone A Friend…
Amitabh Bachchan: Aap kisse baat karna chahenge!?
Santa Singh: Main aapki Misej [Mrs.] Jaya Bachan Ji ko phone karna chahoonga...

Amitabh Bachchan Faints !!! But the Call gets connected to Jaya Bachchan [Thanks to AirTel J]…

Santa Singh: "Jayaji, Who is the father of Abhishek Bachchan!?"
Jaya Bachchan: What are the options !?!?

Hearing this Santa Singh faints too…
hey bitasta...
rokking ones yarr!!!!:D

[animateash]

cool oen tukz..............

[guru_sal]

Indian & Pakistami soldiers r on the border.
But surprised they r not fighting !
Do u know wy ?
Coz dhishum dhishum
to pepsodent ka kaam hai na ! ! !

Johny Walker : Mere pass bangla hai,
gadi hai, bank loker hai,
Kya hai tumhare pass ?
Johny Leaver : Mere pass in sabki chabi hai !

Ek tum ho ki kitne acche ho,
1 tum ho ki kitne pyare ho,
1 tum ho ki kitne sunder ho,
1 tum kitne sacche ho,
1 hum hai ki jhooth bolte ja rahe hain.

Kash tumhare chere pe
chicken-pox ke daag hote,
Kash tumhare chere pe
chicken-pox ke daag hote,
chand to tum ho hi, sitare bhi saath hote!!

Kisses blown r kisses wasted,
kisses r not kisses unless they are tasted,
kisses spread germs gersm are hated ,
so kiss me baby iam vaccinated

Santa Singh Ji Zebra Crossing ke Black & White
Patte par Bar Bar idhar se Udhar chalte the ,
Woh kya soch rahe honge ?
THINK ???? “SALA YEH PIYANO BAJTA KYO NAHI ??”

Recent studies have revealed that
idiots use their thumbs to scroll
through their text messages.
Don’t change to your finger….
it’s too late…. idiot !

Recent News Headlines : Softdrinks Contain
Dangerous Pestcides.
Insan to newspaper padh sakte
hain par janwaro ka kya hoga kyonki….
Aaj kal CHEETAH BHI PEETA HAI !

[animateash]

cool ones karan..........

[guru_sal]

hey bhaggu ash ab mera naam bhi bhul gaye

[tukz]

kul ones guru

[tukz]

hey bitasta...
rokking ones yarr!!!!:D
gud work tukz
thnx a lot ash divs n guru

[guru_sal]

kul ones guru
thankz tukz

[guru_sal]

thnx a lot ash divs n guru
yr most welcome

[guru_sal]

Amusing: L/R brain coordination. ....

It's worth a try.

While sitting at your desk make clockwise circles with your right foot.

While doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand.

Your foot will change direction.

Well Agar ho jaye..do write me..???

Its amazing na ..Wha u think..??

[guru_sal]

Divorce joke

A man in Phoenix calls his son in New York the day before
Thanksgiving and says, "I hate to ruin your day, but I have
to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five
years of misery is enough."

"Pop, what are you talking about?" the son screams.

"We can't stand the sight of each other any longer," the father
says. "We're sick of each other, and I'm sick of talking about
this, so you call your sister in Chicago and tell her."

Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone.
"Like hell they're getting divorced," she shouts, "I'll take
care of this," She calls Phoenix immediately, and screams at
her father, "You are NOT getting divorced. Don't do a single
thing until I get there. I'm calling my brother back, and we'll
both be there tomorrow. Until then, don't do a thing, DO YOU
HEAR ME?" and hangs up.

The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. "Okay," he
says, "they're coming for Thanksgiving and paying their own way."

[guru_sal]

HOW DO U KNOW IF IT IS TRUE LOVE?


Ur HEART beats faster when U hear O their name.
u behave different with them G then the rest of the world
They R the only G that U want 2 be with.
No G else is even worth looking at..
U would walk B miles N the ]snow just 2 C them
U will do everything N UR power to make them HaPpY
When some1 asks for Ur No#, Usay " U can (call ( my friend kget it from them.
When every romantic thing makes U think of them.
When U :: CrY:: when you won't C each other 4 a whil.
U go 2 zZzZzZzZzZz sleepThinking about them.
Uwake UP thinking about them
U want 2 spend every 6 moment with them
U don't mind if all they want 2 do is cuddle
Silence doesn't bother U
They R not only UR Y lover, but also Ur best friend
U can tell them anything
U can go 2 the movies k actually WATCH the movie, they R always there 4 U.
They R there when times R rough
When U say, "I LOVE YOU " k mean it.

NOW SCROLL H k MAKE A WISH ABOUT SOMEONE U LOVE !!!!!






THOUGHT OF G ??????









U'D BETTER HAVE IT!!!!!!







i i i i i
i STOP! i
i i i i i

NOW @LL U HAVE 2 DO IS . SEND THIS 2 ()PEOPLE k UR
WISH WILL COME a TRUE a



IF U DON'T..THEN UR LOVE 'LL START 2 HATE U... k

THAT WOULD BE A VERY L BAD L THING

[guru_sal]

How Long?



A guy sticks his head into a barber shop and asks, "How long before I
can get a haircut?"

The barber looks around the shop and says, "About 2 hours."

The guy leaves.

A few days later the same guy sticks his head in the door and asks, "
How long before I can get a haircut?"

The barber looks around at the shop full of customers and says, "About 3
hours."

The guy leaves.

A week later the same guy sticks his head in the shop and asks, "How
long before I can get a haircut?"

The barber looks around the shop and says, "About an hour and a half."

The guy leaves.

The barber who is intrigued by this time, looks over at a friend in the
shop and says, "Hey, Bill. Follow that guy and see where he goes."

A little while later, Bill comes back into the shop, laughing
hysterically.

The barber asks, "Bill, where did he go when he left here?"

Bill looks up, tears in his eyes and says, "Your house."

[guru_sal]

I Need You Now



My friend, I need you now.

Please take me by the hand.

Stand by me in my hour of need,

Take time to understand.



Take my hand, dear friend,

And lead me from this place.

Chase away my doubts and fears,

Wipe the tears from my face.



Friend, I cannot stand alone.

I need your hand to hold,

The warmth of your gentle touch

In my world that's grown so cold.



Please be a friend to me

And hold me day by day.

Because with your loving hand in mine,

I know we'll find the way.



__._,_.___

[guru_sal]

Jokes as Stupid as I am...



You know how it is when you're reading a book and falling asleep, you're reading, reading . . . And all of a sudden you notice your eyes are closed? I'm like that all the time.

Last night, I walked up to this beautiful woman in a bar and asked her, "Do you live around here often?" She said, "You're wearing two different colored socks." I said, "Yes, but to me they're the same because I go by thickness." Then she asked, "How do you feel?" and I said, "Well, you know when you're sitting on a chair and you lean back so you're just on two legs then you lean too far and you almost fall over but at the last second you catch yourself? I feel like that all the time."

Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time. I think I've forgotten this before.

Lots of comedians have people they try to mimic. I mimic my shadow.

I got a new shadow. I had to get rid of the other one . . . It wasn't doing what I was doing.

I was once walking through the forest alone. A tree fell right in front of me--and I didn't hear it.

I wrote a song, but I can't read music so I don't know what it is. Every once in a while I'll be listening to the radio and I say, "I think I might have written that."

He asked me if I knew what time it was. I said, "Yes, but not right now."

I put tape on the mirrors in my house so I don't accidentally walk through into another dimension.

[tukz]

awesom wrk guru

[tukz]

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS







Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy




____________ _________ _________




OFFICE ARITHMETIC







Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime




____________ _________ ________







SHOPPING MATH







A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs.
A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn't need.




____________ _________ ________







GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS







A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.




____________ _________ ________







HAPPINESS







To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.




____________ _________ _________







LONGEVITY







Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.




____________ _________ _________








PROPENSITY TO CHANGE







A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.




____________ _________ ________







DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE







A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.




____________ _________ ________




HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED







Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.

[tukz]

Latter from husband ( who is abroad) to wife








Dear Sweetheart:


I can't send my salary this month, so I am sending 100 kisses.


You are my sweetheart

Your husband




Allen







============ ========= ========= =========








His wife replied back after some days to her husband:






Dearest sweetheart,



Thanks for your 100 kisses, I am sending the expenses details.



1. The Milk man agreed on 2 kisses for one month's milk.


2. The electricity man only agreed after 7 kisses.


3. Your house owner is coming every day and taking two or three kisses



Instead of the rent.


4. Supermarket owner did not accept kisses only, so I have given him
Some other items....... ....


5. Other expenses 40 kisses



Please don't worry for me, I have a remaining balance of 35 kisses and
I hope I can complete the month using this balance.







Shall I plan same way for next months, Please Advise!!!




Your Sweet Heart






============ ========= ========= ========

[guru_sal]

awesom wrk guru
hey thankz a lot but yrs r 22222222gud

[guru_sal]

so heres an interesting post by me








































































































































scroll down































,,,,,,,,,















,,,,,,,,,,,,,,















,,,,,,,,,,,,










now this post












shows

















dat
























how























desperate

















































uuuu




























rrrrrrrrr

















222222222222

















read














my















post








arre mat pado phaltu hai

[tukz]

so heres an interesting post by me








































































































































scroll down































,,,,,,,,,















,,,,,,,,,,,,,,















,,,,,,,,,,,,










now this post












shows

















dat
























how























desperate

















































uuuu




























rrrrrrrrr

















222222222222

















read














my















post








arre mat pado phaltu hai
hey thnx n welcum n briiiiiiiiiiiilian\d job

[guru_sal]

ya tukz thankz and yr most wecome

[guru_sal]

hey guyz woh post jaruur padna.

[divyaashimix]

hey guyz woh post jaruur padna.
kaunsi post?

[tukz]

hey guyz woh post jaruur padna.
yah kaunsi????????????

[guru_sal]

Not For U .aapne To Pad Li

[tukz]

Not For U .aapne To Pad Li
oh okies...........

[guru_sal]

JOKES



Papa : beta har parai stri ko apni Maa samjho to tumhara character
thik ho jaaega.....

Beta : Lekin Papa fir Aap ke character ka kya hoga....???

============ ========= ========= ========= ========= ========= ========= ==

Sardar: O Banno Car ki speed itani ky badha di..?

biwi: Oji Car ki break fail ho gayi hai, Exident ho jaye iske pahale ghar pahunch jaate hai.

============ ========= ========= ========= ========= ========= ========= ==

Customer: If I post this letter tonight, will it get to Delhi in two days time?
Post Master : Yes sir, it definitely will.
Customer : I bet you, it won't.
Post Master : Why not?
Customer : It's addressed to Mumbai.

============ ========= ========= ========= ========= ========= ========= ==

Wife : Honey ...... What are You Looking for ?

Husband : Nothing.

Wife : Nothing...?? U've been reading our marriage certificate 4 an
hour ...?? Husband : I was just looking 4 the expiry date.

[guru_sal]

* The first secret - the power of thought.
Love begins with our thoughts. We become what we think about.Loving
thoughts create loving experiences and loving relationships.
Affirmations can change our beliefs and thoughts about ourselves and
others. If we want to love someone, we need to consider their needs and
desires. Thinking about your ideal partner
will help you recognize her when you meet her.

* The second secret - the power of respect.
You cannot love anyone or anything unless you first respect them. The
first person you need to respect is yourself. To begin to gain
self-respect ask yourself, "What do I respect about myself?" To gain
respect for others, even those you may dislike, ask yourself
"What do I respect about them?"

* The third secret - the power of giving.
If you want to receive love, all you have to do is give it! The more love
you give, the more you will receive. To love is to give of yourself,
freely and unconditionally. Practice random acts of
kindness. Before committing to a relationship ask not what the other
person will be able to give to you, but rather what will you be able to
give them. The secret formula of a happy, lifelong, loving relationship is
to always focus on what you can give instead of what you can take.

* The fourth secret - the power of friendship.
To find a true love, you must first find a true friend. Love does not
consist of gazing into each other's eyes, but rather looking outward
together in the same direction. To love someone completelely you must love
them for who they are, not what they look like.
Friendship is the soil through which love's seeds grow. If you want to
bring love into a relationship, you must first bring friendship.

* The fifth secret - the power of touch.
Touch is one of the most powerful expressions of love, breaking down
barriers and bonding relationships. Touch changes our physical and
emotional states and makes us more receptive
to love.

* The sixth secret - the power of letting go.
If you love something, let it free. If it comes back to you it's yours, if
it doesn't it never was. Even in a loving relationship, people need their
own space. If we want to learn to love, we must first learn to forgive and
let go of past hurts and grievances. Love means letting go of our fears,
prejudices, egos and conditions." Today I let go of all my fears, the past
has no power over me - today is the beginning of a new life."

* The seventh secret - the power of communication.
When we learn to communicate openly and honestly, life changes. To love
someone is to communicate with them. Let the people you love know that you
love them and appreciate them. Never be afraid to say those three magic
words: "I Love You." Never let an opportunity pass to praise someone.
Always leave someone you love with a loving word - it could be the last
time you see them. If you were about to die but could make telephone calls
to the people you loved, who would you call, what would you say
and......... ....... ...why are you waiting?
* The eighth secret - the power of commitment.
If you want to have love in abundance, you must be committed to it, and
that commmitment will be reflected in your thoughts and actions.
Commitment is the true test of love. If you want to have loving
relationships, you must be committed to loving relationships. When you are
committed to someone or something, quitting is never an option. Commitment
distinguishes a fragile relationship from a strong one.

* The ninth secret - the power of passion.
Passion ignites love and keeps it alive. Lasting passion does not come
through physical attraction alone, it comes from deep commitment,
enthusiasm, interest and excitement. Passion can be recreated by
recreating past experiences when you felt passionate. Spontaneity and
surprises produce passion. The essence of love and happiness are the same;
all we need to do is to live each day with passion.
* The tenth secret - the power of trust.
Trust is essential in all loving relationships. Without it one person
becomes suspicious, anxious and fearful and the other person feels trapped
and emotionally suffocated.
You cannot love someone completely unless you trust them completely. Act
as if your relationship with the person you love will never end.
One of the way in which always you can tell whether a person is right for
you is to ask yourself, "Do I trust them completely and unreservedly? " If
the answer is "no", think carefully before making a commitment.

The heart is the happiest when it beats for others.

[guru_sal]

*A student asks a teacher, "What is love?"

The teacher said, "in order to answer your question, go to the wheat
field and choose the biggest wheat and come back.
But the rule is: you can go through them only once and cannot turn
back
to pick."
The student went to the field, go thru first row, he saw one big
wheat,
but he wonders....may be there is a bigger one later.
Then he saw another bigger one... but may be there is an even bigger
one waiting for him.
Later, when he finished more than half of the wheat field, he start to
realise that the wheat is not as big as the previous one he saw, he
know he has missed the biggest one, and he regretted.
So, he ended up went back to the teacher with empty hand. The teacher
told him, "...this is love... you keep looking for a better one, but
when later you realise, you have already miss the person...."*

*"What is marriage then?" the student asked.

The teacher said, "in order to answer your question, go to the corn
field and choose the biggest corn and come back. But the rule is: you
can go through them only once and cannot turn back to pick."
The student went to the corn field, this time he is careful not to
repeat the previous mistake, when he reach the middle of the field, he
has picked one medium corn that he feel satisfy, and come back to the
teacher.
The teacher told him, "this time you bring back a corn.... you look
for
one that is just nice, and you have faith and believe this is the best
one you get.... this is marriage."*

[tukz]

hey guru brilliant job

[guru_sal]

thankz a lot

[animateash]

gud oen guru

[guru_sal]

thankz ash

[guru_sal]

Jokes to confirm that I'm a Fool (One Liners)



I've been doing a lot of abstract painting lately, extremely abstract. No brush, no paint, no canvas, I just think about it.

My watch is three hours fast, and I can't fix it. So I'm going to move to New York.

I like to reminisce with people I don't know.

I like to skate on the other side of the ice.

I'm so hyper . . . [Said with a very dull voice.]

If you can't hear me, it's because I'm in parentheses.

Four years ago . . . No, it was yesterday. Today I . . . No, that wasn't me. Sometimes I . . . No, I don't.

Is it weird in here, or is it just me?

A friend of mine once sent me a post card with a picture of the entire planet Earth taken from space. On the back it said, "Wish you were here."

Every so often, I like to stick my head out the window, look up, and smile for a satellite picture.

I'm moving to Mars next week, so if you have any boxes...

Sorry, my mind was wandering. One time my mind went all the way to Venus on mail order and I couldn't pay for it.

I have a map of the United States... Actual size. It says, "Scale: 1 mile = 1 mile." I spent last summer folding it. I also have a full-size map of the world. I hardly ever unroll it. People ask me where I live, and I say, "E6".

It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to have to paint it.

Cross country skiing is great if you live in a small country.

Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time.

You can't have everything. Where would you put it?

I have the world's largest collection of seashells. I keep it on all the beaches of the world . . . Perhaps you've seen it.

[guru_sal]

He vs s He in Office :)


How the company views its employees. (HE vs SHE)


1. The family picture is on HIS desk.
Ah, a solid, responsible family man.

The family picture is on HER desk.
Umm, her family will come before her career.


2. HIS desk is cluttered.
He's obviously a hard worker and a busy man.

HER desk is cluttered.
She's obviously a disorganised scatterbrain


3. HE is talking with his co-workers.
He must be discussing the latest deal

SHE is talking with her co-workers.
She must be gossiping.


4. HE's not at his desk. He must be at a meeting.

SHE's not at her desk. She must be in the ladies' room.


5. HE's not in the office. He's meeting with customers.

SHE's not in the office. She must be out shopping.


6. HE's having lunch with the boss. He's on his way up.

SHE's having lunch with the boss. They must be having an affair.


7. The boss criticised HIM. He'll improve his performance.

The boss criticized HER. She'll be very upset.


8. HE got an unfair deal. Did he get angry?

SHE got an unfair deal. Did she cry?


9. HE's going on a business trip. It's good for his career.

SHE's going on a business trip. What does her husband say?


10 . HE's leaving for a better job.
He knows how to recognise a good opportunity.

SHE's leaving for a better job. Women are not dependable

[guru_sal]

Painful break up

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A Marine was deployed to Afghanistan. While he was there he received a letter from his girlfriend. In the letter she explained that she had dated two guys while he had been gone and she wanted to break up with him. AND, she wanted pictures of herself back.

So the Marine did what any squared-away Marine would do. He went around to his buddies and collected all the unwanted photos of women that he could find. He then mailed about 25 pictures of women (with clothes and without) to his girlfriend with the following note:

"I don't remember which one you are. Please remove your pictures and send the rest back."


Plane crash

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Abe and Esther are flying to Australia for a two-week vacation to celebrate their 40th anniversary. Suddenly, over the public address system, the Captain announces, "Ladies and Gentlemen, I am afraid I have some very bad news. Our engines have ceased functioning and we will attempt an emergency landing. Luckily, I see an uncharted island below us and we should be able to land on the beach. However, the odds are that we may never be rescued and will have to live on the island for the rest of our lives!"

Thanks to the skill of the flight crew, the plane lands safely on the island. An hour later Abe turns to his wife and asks, "Esther, did we pay our $5,000 PBS pledge check yet?"

"No, sweetheart," she responds.

Abe, still shaken from the crash landing, then asks, "Esther, did we pay our American Express card yet?"

"Oh, no! I'm sorry. I forgot to send the check," she says.

"One last thing, Esther. Did you remember to send checks for the Visa and MasterCard this month?" he asks.

"Oh, forgive me, Abie," begged Esther. "I didn't send that one, either."

Abe grabs her and gives her the biggest kiss in 40 years. Esther pulls away and asks him, "What was that for?"

Abe answers, "They'll find us!"

No mail

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his blonde neighbour came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox.

She opened it, looked inside, slammed it shut, and stormed back into her house.

A little later she came out of his house again, went to the mailbox, again opened it, and slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went.

As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came again. She marched to the mailbox, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever.

Puzzled by her actions, the man asked her, "Is something wrong?"

To which the blonde replied, "There certainly is! My stupid computer keeps telling me I have mail!"

[animateash]

cool oens guru.////////////

[guru_sal]

hey ash thankz a lot .
ab kal post karubnga
got2go now

[tukz]

hy guru brillnt job

[divyaashimix]

hey guru...
gr8 job..........:) :D

[guru_sal]

hy guru brillnt job
thankz tukz

[guru_sal]

hey guru...
gr8 job..........:) :D
thankz divu

[guru_sal]

Are you talking to me?
At the height of a political corruption trial, the prosecuting attorney attacked a witness. "Isn't it true," he bellowed, "that you accepted five thousand dollars to compromise this case?"

The witness stared out the window, as though he hadn't heard the question.

"Isn't it true that you accepted five thousand dollars to compromise this case?" the lawyer repeated.

The witness still did not respond.

Finally, the judge leaned over and said, "Sir, please answer the question."

"Oh," the startled witness said, "I thought he was talking to you."

[guru_sal]

What Girls Can Do



Do you know the relationship between two eyes..? they blink together,

they move together, they cry together, they see things together and

they sleep together BUT THEY NEVER SEE EACH OTHER.. that's what's friendship




But when a beautiful girl comes in front, one eye goes blink and the other remains open........ ......... ......... ......... .....


Moral of the story : Girls can break even the best of friendships.

[guru_sal]

What's the opposite of "Dominoes"???


think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think

tired of thinking???

Well the answer is "Domi doesn't know"

Whats the opposite of "Pizza Hut"










....

okei don't kill me "Pizza Hutna mat"



ok whats the opp of venky's..







venlocks...
(now,now,dont bang ur head plz..)



Whats the opposite of Gopalakrishnan?

Comepalakrishnan.


What is the opposite of Subramnium Swamy?

Subramanium Didn't See Me.

[guru_sal]

Tongue Twisters



Twister Shorties: (say them a few times). Some are common, some are raunchy, some are poems..
Greek grapes.
Red lorry, yellow lorry.
Which wristwatches are Swiss wristwatches?
Unique New York.
Many an anemone sees an enemy anemone.
Freshly-fried flying fish.
The epitome of femininity.
A skunk sat on a stump and thunk the stump stunk, but the stump thunk the skunk stunk.
She stood on the balcony, inexplicably mimicing him hiccupping, and amicably welcoming him home.
Imagine an imaginary menagerie manager imagining managing an imaginary menagerie.
Common Twisters:
She sells seashells by the seashore. The shells she sells are surely seashells. So if she sells shells on the seashore, I'm sure she sells seashore shells.
Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers. Did Peter Piper pick a peck of pickled peppers? If Peter Piper Picked a peck of pickled peppers, Where's the peck of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked?
How much wood would a woodchuck chuck If a woodchuck could chuck wood? He would chuck, he would, as much as he could, And chuck as much as a woodchuck would If a woodchuck could chuck wood.
Tongue Twister Poems:
Mr. See owned a saw. And Mr. Soar owned a seesaw. Now, See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw Before Soar saw See, Which made Soar sore. Had Soar seen See's saw Before See sawed Soar's seesaw, See's saw would not have sawed Soar's seesaw. So See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw. But it was sad to see Soar so sore just because See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw.
Betty Botter had some butter, "But," she said, "this butter's bitter. If I bake this bitter butter, It would make my batter bitter. But a bit of better butter, That would make my batter better." So she bought a bit of butter - Better than her bitter butter - And she baked it in her batter; And the batter was not bitter. So 'twas better Betty Botter Bought a bit of better butter.
Ned Nott was shot and Sam Shott was not. So it is better to be Shott than Nott. Some say Nott was not shot. But Shott says he shot Nott. Either the shot Shott shot at Nott was not shot, Or Nott was shot. If the shot Shott shot shot Nott, Nott was shot. But if the shot Shott shot shot Shott, Then Shott was shot, not Nott. However, the shot Shott shot shot not Shott, but Nott.
A tree-toad loved a she-toad Who lived up in a tree. He was a two-toed tree-toad, But a three-toed toad was she. The two-toed tree-toad tried to win The three-toed she-toad's heart, For the two-toed tree-toad loved the ground That the three-toed tree-toad trod. But the two-toed tree-toad tried in vain; He couldn't please her whim. From her tree-toad bower, With her three-toad power, The she-toad vetoed him.

Raunchy Twisters:
I'm not a smart feller, I'm a smart feller's son And I'll keep felling smarts 'Till the smart feller comes.
I'm not a fog ducker, I'm a fog ducker's son And I'll keep ducking fogs 'Till the fog ducker comes.
I am not the fig plucker, I'm a fig plucker's son. And I'll keep plucking figs 'Till the fig plucker comes. or
I'm not a pheasant plucker I'm a pheasant plucker's son, and Ill sit here plucking pheasants til the pheasant plucker comes
I slit the sheet, the sheet I slit; and on the slitted sheet I sit.

[tukz]

Tongue Twisters



Twister Shorties: (say them a few times). Some are common, some are raunchy, some are poems..
Greek grapes.
Red lorry, yellow lorry.
Which wristwatches are Swiss wristwatches?
Unique New York.
Many an anemone sees an enemy anemone.
Freshly-fried flying fish.
The epitome of femininity.
A skunk sat on a stump and thunk the stump stunk, but the stump thunk the skunk stunk.
She stood on the balcony, inexplicably mimicing him hiccupping, and amicably welcoming him home.
Imagine an imaginary menagerie manager imagining managing an imaginary menagerie.
Common Twisters:
She sells seashells by the seashore. The shells she sells are surely seashells. So if she sells shells on the seashore, I'm sure she sells seashore shells.
Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers. Did Peter Piper pick a peck of pickled peppers? If Peter Piper Picked a peck of pickled peppers, Where's the peck of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked?
How much wood would a woodchuck chuck If a woodchuck could chuck wood? He would chuck, he would, as much as he could, And chuck as much as a woodchuck would If a woodchuck could chuck wood.
Tongue Twister Poems:
Mr. See owned a saw. And Mr. Soar owned a seesaw. Now, See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw Before Soar saw See, Which made Soar sore. Had Soar seen See's saw Before See sawed Soar's seesaw, See's saw would not have sawed Soar's seesaw. So See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw. But it was sad to see Soar so sore just because See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw.
Betty Botter had some butter, "But," she said, "this butter's bitter. If I bake this bitter butter, It would make my batter bitter. But a bit of better butter, That would make my batter better." So she bought a bit of butter - Better than her bitter butter - And she baked it in her batter; And the batter was not bitter. So 'twas better Betty Botter Bought a bit of better butter.
Ned Nott was shot and Sam Shott was not. So it is better to be Shott than Nott. Some say Nott was not shot. But Shott says he shot Nott. Either the shot Shott shot at Nott was not shot, Or Nott was shot. If the shot Shott shot shot Nott, Nott was shot. But if the shot Shott shot shot Shott, Then Shott was shot, not Nott. However, the shot Shott shot shot not Shott, but Nott.
A tree-toad loved a she-toad Who lived up in a tree. He was a two-toed tree-toad, But a three-toed toad was she. The two-toed tree-toad tried to win The three-toed she-toad's heart, For the two-toed tree-toad loved the ground That the three-toed tree-toad trod. But the two-toed tree-toad tried in vain; He couldn't please her whim. From her tree-toad bower, With her three-toad power, The she-toad vetoed him.

Raunchy Twisters:
I'm not a smart feller, I'm a smart feller's son And I'll keep felling smarts 'Till the smart feller comes.
I'm not a fog ducker, I'm a fog ducker's son And I'll keep ducking fogs 'Till the fog ducker comes.
I am not the fig plucker, I'm a fig plucker's son. And I'll keep plucking figs 'Till the fig plucker comes. or
I'm not a pheasant plucker I'm a pheasant plucker's son, and Ill sit here plucking pheasants til the pheasant plucker comes
I slit the sheet, the sheet I slit; and on the slitted sheet I sit.

kuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuul 1

[guru_sal]

kuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuul 1
ttttthhhhhhhaaannnnnnkkkkkkkuuuuu

[tukz]

ttttthhhhhhhaaannnnnnkkkkkkkuuuuu
ur msssssssssssssssssssssssssssssst wlecum

[animateash]

kul ones................

[guru_sal]

kul ones................
thankz a lot ash

[guru_sal]

1)what is the cube of 13?
Its : SUROOR
wandaring how?
thats bcoz....
TERA * TERA * TERA = SUROOR

2) ek aadmi k 6 fingers thi,use log hanuman bulate the...batao kyon?
kyonki uska naam hanuman tha..

3) who was the 1st Indian woman fly abroad?
..........sita with ravan

4) wht did the kangaroo say when she found her baby missing?
…….Aaila!!!!! kisne mera pocket maar liya

5) wht do u call a really colourful tamilian???
Ans: Rangamannar rangrajan

6) n elephant falls in luv wid n Ant.but Ant's parents r against their marrige…guess y??
they gave a solid reason…**Ladke k daant bahar hain**

7)ones sardarji saw a very soni kudi in the market & thought..
……kash k ye meri maa hondi to main v inna sona honda..

Full form of MATHS?
Mentally Affected Teacher Harassing Students…

9) what wud u call a girl who never laughs??
Ans: hasina

[guru_sal]

101 Romantic ideas and Tips for men & women who are in Love........

************ ********* ********* ********

1. Remember to say "I love you" and "I need you" often.

2. Walk hand in hand in the rain.

3. Write a love poem.

4. Call a radio station and dedicate a favorite song.

5. Write "I Love You" in lipstick or shaving cream on the mirror.

6. Hide love notes in a lunch box, briefcase or purse.

7. Make heart-shaped cinnamon toast for breakfast.

8. Place a love note in the personals section of the newspaper.

9. Take a carriage ride around the city.

10. Plan a surprise getaway.

11. Do your mate's household chores.

12. Write notes on future dates in their date book ("I love you," I miss you," etc.)

13. Make reservations at a favorite restaurant.

14. Let them choose the movie.

15. Give a foot massage.

16. Make a heart-shaped bookmark, and place it in their book.

17. Pop in a romantic music CD and slow dance.

18. Throw a just-because surprise party for two.

19. Buy a stuffed animal for your honey.

20. Read each other's horoscopes.

21. Make a list of the top 10 things you love about your partner.

22. Display it in a prominent place.

23. Tattoo your mate's name on your body.

24. Make an album or scrapbook of your favorite memories together.

25. Go camping together and only take one sleeping bag.

26. Send a mushy message in a bottle...a balloon...a sandwich...

27. Cut out a silly cartoon that you know they'd enjoy.

28. Shower together.

29. Dim the lights, and snuggle together on the couch.

30. Be the first to say "I'm sorry" and kiss and make up.

31. Give each other a full-body massage.

32. Kiss every hour on the hour all day long.

33. Send a gift basket of indulgent items.

34. Write "I'm hot for you" in the steam on the bathroom mirror.

35. Ribbon wrap your bed with a big bow.

36. Fill up the gas tank of your partner's car.

37. Act like teenagers. Maybe even pierce something!

38. Show up with a bouquet of flowers -- for no reason at all.

39. Play Scrabble® together, using as many "love" words as you can.

40. Run a warm bubble bath for your partner, with lots of lit candles.

41. Meet in the park for a picnic.

42. Hold hands.

43. Leave a trail of rose petals through the house, leading to a romantic candlelight dinner.

44. Make a donation in your mate's name to a special cause or charity.

45. Pick up their clothes from the floor -- without saying a word about it.

46. Watch an old black and white romantic movie and share a bowl of popcorn.

47. Reenact your first date.

48. Surprise your partner with tickets to a special event.

49. An unexpected hug can brighten any day.

50. Buy a silly, impromptu gift.

51. Send an email just to say "I'm thinking of you."

52. Bring home a balloon bouquet.

53. Serve breakfast in bed.

54. Make an ornament with a picture of both of you for the Christmas tree.

55. Play tag.

56. Wash and wax your partner's car, and leave a little note on the dashboard.

57. Plant a garden together.

58. Leave a mushy message on voicemail.

59. Stay at a hotel for the night, just because.

60. Make angels in the snow.

61. Every time you say "hello" or "goodbye", seal it with a hug and a kiss.

62. Take a drive in the country.

63. Spend the evening looking at the stars -- and make a wish together.

64. Cast a playful wink any time, anywhere.

65. Think up a list of silly little pet names for times when you're alone together.

66. Read poetry to each other.

67. Celebrate your half-birthdays together.

68. Put a picture of both of you in your wallet.

69. Buy that favorite book or CD for no reason at all.

70. Send a care package to work filled with treats like food, photos, candy, a love note, heart-shaped confetti, etc.

71. Go out for the evening and tell people you're on your honeymoon.

72. Take a hike together and carve your initials in a tree.

73. Write a thank you note for all the things you take for granted.

74. Make a fire in the fireplace and roast marshmallows.

75. Tape your favorite TV show and spend the evening talking.

76. Do the dishes together, then apply hand lotion to each other's hands.

77. Write a love letter to your partner and cut it into jigsaw puzzle pieces.

78. Decide on secret signals and use them to communicate with each other in large groups of people.

79. Schedule a regular mid-week "date night" for just the two of you.

80. Do the laundry together.

81. Romance Theater Weekend: reenact each other's favorite love scene - hers on Friday, his on Saturday.

82. Call your partner at work and ask for a date.

83. Pretend you haven't seen each other for a month. Act accordingly.

84. Send a written invitation to do something special.

85. Take turns reading to each other.

86. Stand outside the window and sing a romantic song.

87. Hide favorite candy in your partner's coat pockets.

88. Put a tape recording of your voice (saying anything) in the car stereo and turn it on so it plays when the car starts.

89. Go to a drive-in movie.

90. Get up to turn off the last light after you're both comfy-cozy in bed.

91. Hold each other tight during a thunderstorm.

92. Make a tape recording of favorite love songs.

93. Leave a bunch of bananas on the kitchen table with a note, "I go bananas over you!"

94. Hide love notes in a magazine.

95. Declare your undying love via a telegram.

96. Make a romantic dinner together, and serve it on your finest china.

97. Surprise your partner with a big kiss on the neck.

98. Give unexpected compliments.

99. Share an ice cream cone.

100. Have a picnic on the living room floor.

101. Draw a silly picture of the two of you. Frame it.

[guru_sal]

Present this to your boss !!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!! !!

Doctor Certified Professional
Certified that Mr./Miss____________ _____ , working in your organization, is suffering from 'time-bound' illness. Due to this, he will NOT be able to work more than 8 hours a day and 5 days a week. Any attempt to stretch beyond this timing will lead to severe health problems. The losses to the company due to medical reimbursements will be far more compared to the gains made by stretching beyond 8 hours.

It is also warned to keep my patient away from any kind of shocking news such as " Come over weekend..", "Let's work on holiday..", " Leave cannot be granted.." etc. which can directly lead to heart strokes.

In view of the above, it is strongly recommended to adjust your project deadlines in accordance with the convenience of my patient.

Sd/-

Dr. Impatient

Cyber Clinic

[guru_sal]

AAPKI KASHISH.......SARFAROSH HAI.....................

Wah Wah..... Wah Wah...

AAPKA NASHA.......... YUN MADHOSH HAI...................

Bahot Khub......

KYA KAHEIN TUMSE JANE JAAN...........

TU KHARGOSH HAI...

[animateash]

cool ones.........................

[guru_sal]

cool ones.........................
thankuuuuuuuuuuu

[guru_sal]

_______________

_____________________


_________
________________ __________



______________

______________



________________

____

confuse mat ho
aap mujhe achche lage isliye ine mar raha hoon

[guru_sal]

Santa and Banta Singh rob a bank and mess it up, managing to escape with two sacks that they find on the floor. And they take one sack each. After awhile they meet again and one asks the other, 'What did you find in your sack?'

'Ten lakh Rupees!'

'Wow... that's a lot! What did you do with the cash?'

'I bought a house. How about your sack?'

'Bah... it was full of bills.'

'And what did you do with them?'

'Eh, well... little by little, I'm paying them off...'

[guru_sal]

Khabhi khabhi koi yaad
Koi bahoott purani yaad
Dil key derwazey per
Aisey dastak deti hey
Shaam ko jaisey tara nikley
Subha ko jaisey phool
Jaisey dherey dherey zameen per
Roshniyoun ka nazool
Jaisey rooh ki piyaas bhujhaney
Utrey koi rasool
Jaisey rotey rotey achanak
Hans dey koi malool

[guru_sal]

Train Late Ho Gayee



A kid was playing with his newly bought play train. After every turn was completed the kid
stopped the train and shouted, "Station aa gaya hai! Jis ULLU KE PATHEY ko utarna hai utar jaye!"

Then he let the train go on the round and stopped it again at the same place.

He shouted, "Station aa gaya hai! Jis ULLU KE PATHEY ko utarna hai utar jaye!"

And so it went for sometime. Every time the train stopped the kid would scream the same sentence.
His Dad, sitting near him, got a little worried about the kid using bad language.

He took the train away from him and scolded the child, "Do not talk like that!"

The kid sat silently for sometime and Dad could not bear to see the sad innocent face.

He returned the train back to him saying, "Now son, do not talk like that again."

The kid started playing. The train took the same turn and stopped and the kid shouted, "Station
aa gaya hai! Jis ULLU KE PATHE ko utarna hai utar jaey! Pehley hee ek ULLU KE PATHEY ke
waja se train aadha ghanta late ho gaee hai!"

[guru_sal]

Bohot kuch badal jata hai
Tere aane ke baad,
Bohot kuch bichar jata hai
Tere jaane ke baad,
Wo samandar ki leherey,
Wo rait ke mehal,
Bohot kuch beh jata hai
Saahil se takra jaane ke baad,
Wo baarish ke moti,
Wo taaro ki khuwahish,
Bohot kuch bikhar jata hai
Khuwaab toot jaane ke baad,
Wo teri parchaiyon se takrana,
Wo saayon ka lehrana
Bohot kuch mit jata hai andhera chhaa jaane ke baad
!!!!!!!!
...

************ ********* ******

Kabhi dukh ki aanch kisi pe na anay dena
Aaya hai mehmaan koi to na jaaney dena
Har ghari khud say ulajh jata ho may
Agar koi manaaye tu mananay dena
May jo aksar tanhaaye may ro parta hoo
Qisa-e-ghum sunaav tu sunanay dena
Us ne bheja hai yeh peghaam ba zaroor
Hawa zulf tumhari lehraaye tu lehraaney dena
Har baat ka matlab gatal na nikala karo
Jab may samjhaav tu samajhanay dena.


************ ********* ******

Aaj Rootha huwa ik dost bohot yaad aaya
Acha guzra huwa kuch waqt bohot yaad aaya.
Meri aankho k her ik ashk pe ronay wala
Aaj jab aankh yeh roee tu bohot yaad aaya.
Jo mere dard ko seene main chupa laita tha
aj jab dard huwa mujh ko bohot yaad aaya.
Jo meri aankh main kajal ki tara rehta tha
aaj kajal jo lagaya tu bohot yaad aaya.
Jo mere dil k tha qareeb faqat us ko hi
aaj jab dil nay bulaya tu bohot yaad aaya.
Mere jeevan ki her khushi main wohi tha bus.....
aaj jab yaad woh aaya tu bohot yaad aaya.

[guru_sal]

A


B


C


D


E



F




G




H





I



J



K



L


M



N



O



P



Q


R



S


T



U



V


W


X


Y



Z



1



2



3



4



5


6


7


8


9



0



!



@



#



$



%





^





&




*




(




)




_





+





|




\




=



-



<



.




.


,



/



?



;


'



:




"




thank God all keys r working.

[guru_sal]

http://i120.photobucket.com/albums/o164/guru_saluja/panjabpcs.gif
dont forget to read d above one

[divyaashimix]

http://i120.photobucket.com/albums/o164/guru_saluja/panjabpcs.gif
dont forget to read d above one
hey bhaggu!
this was a rokking one guru....
and hey folksss.......
please PRIYA DI key liye vote karo.
pleaseeeeeeeeee!!!!

[guru_sal]

thankz a lot divya
and divu maine vote karna chalu kar diya

[tukz]

http://i120.photobucket.com/albums/o164/guru_saluja/panjabpcs.gif
dont forget to read d above one
hey guru grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr8 job

[animateash]

cool ones....................

[guru_sal]

thankz ash and tukzz

[tukz]

thankz ash and tukzz
welcum guru netime

[guru_sal]

JOKE

Sir, yes sir!



It was a dark, stormy, night. The Marine was on his first assignment, and it was guard duty.

A General stepped out taking his dog for a walk. The nervous young Private snapped to attention, made a perfect salute, and snapped out "Sir, Good Evening, Sir!"

The General, out for some relaxation, returned the salute and said "Good evening soldier, nice night, isn't it?"

Well it wasn't a nice night, but the Private wasn't going to disagree with the General, so the he saluted again and replied "Sir, Yes Sir!".

The General continued, "You know there's something about a stormy night that I find soothing, it's really relaxing. Don't you agree?"

The Private didn't agree, but them the private was just a private, and responded "Sir, Yes Sir!"

The General, pointing at the dog, "This is a Golden Retriever, the best type of dog to train."

The Private glanced at the dog, saluted yet again and said "Sir, Yes Sir!"

The General continued "I got this dog for my wife."

The Private simply said "Good trade Sir!"

[guru_sal]

Love is a Most Beautiful and Wonderful Word...



************ ********* ********* *





Love is a wonderful word. It's the kind of word that makes you feel warm and tingly inside. Sometimes love is all you need.
We all go through a stage in our life where you love someone and they don't love you back and you're hurt; you're very hurt and you feel like you just want to die because you cannot be with that person or just even be close to them.

The hardest thing is to see them love someone else. But try to think back when you didn't even know that person or you even hated that person.

Love is a great feeling, right? You will feel this way again; maybe not now, maybe not later, but soon. After all the hurt is gone, you will love again and even stronger than before.

Remember, there are so many guys and girls in this world. Don't let one get you down because it's not worth it and obviously they're not worth your time.

Love truly is a most beautiful and wonderful word, especially when you both share it. understand each other and trust on each other, Other things needed to grow love is honesty,Sincerity, devotion towards your love. You will find someone; just hold on and don't give up.

To learn :

Love is feeling of two hearts who understand each other and who want to live for each other, but People had not understand the real meaning of love. It is understand by those who had fallen in love. Love can make life live..

************ ********* ********* *
Some of the Inspiring Quotes which tell not to give up in life so you can learn something from these Quotes

1) Never expect things to happen..
struggle and make them happen.
never expect yourself to be given a good valuecreate a value of your own

2) If a drop of water falls in lake there is no identity.But if it falls on a leaf of lotus it shine like a pearl.so choose the best place where you would shine..

3) Falling down is not defeat...defeat is when your refuse to get up...

4) Ship is always safe at shore... but is is not built for it

5) When your successful your well wishers know who you are when you are unsuccessful you know who your well wishers are

6) It is great confidence in a friend to tell him your faults; greater to tell him/her

7) "To the world you might be one person,
but to one person you just might be the world

8) "Even the word 'IMPOSSIBLE' says 'I M POSSIBLE' "

9) Effort is important, but knowing where to make an effort in your life makes all the difference.

[tukz]

hey guru brilliant job

[guru_sal]

Thankz A Lot .........

[tukz]

welcum.......

[guru_sal]

hey tukz u hav ne new one
jokes or sum thing

[guru_sal]

LESSON 1
A junior manager, a senior manager and their boss are on their way to a meeting. On their way through a park, they come across a wonder lamp. They rub the lamp and a ghost appears.
The ghost says, "Normally, one is granted three wishes but as you are
three, I will allow one wish each"
So the eager senior manager shouted, "I want the first wish. I want to be in the Bahamas, on a fast boat and have no worries." Pfufffff. and he was gone.
Now the junior manager could not keep quiet and shouted "I want to be In Florida with beautiful girls, plenty of food and cocktails." Pfufffff. and he was also gone.
The boss calmly said, "I want these two idiots back in the office after
lunch at 12.35pm."
MORAL OF THE STORY IS: "ALWAYS ALLOW THE BOSS TO SPEAK FIRST"

LESSON 2
Standing in front of a shredder with a piece of paper in his hand,
"Listen," said the CEO, "this is a very sensitive and important document, and my secretary has left. Can you make this thing work?"
"Certainly," said the young executive.
He turned the machine on, inserted the paper, and pressed the start button.
"Excellent, excellent!" said the CEO as his paper disappeared inside the shredder machine. "I just need one copy."
LESSON II: "NEVER, NEVER ASSUME THAT YOUR BOSS KNOWS EVERYTHING"

LESSON 3
An American and a Japanese were sitting on the plane on the way to LA When the American turned to the Japanese and asked, "What kind of -ese are you?"
The Japanese confused, replied, "Sorry but I don't understand what you mean."
The American repeated, "What kind of -ese are you?"
Again, the Japanese was confused over he question.
The American, now irritated, then yelled, "What kind of -ese are you
... Are you a Chinese, Japanese, Vietnamese!, etc......??? "
The Japanese then replied, "Oh, I am a Japanese."
A while later the Japanese turned to the American and asked What kind Of 'key' was he.
The American, frustrated, yelled, "What do you mean what kind of -kee'am I?!"
The Japanese said, "Are you a Yankee, donkee, or monkee?"
LESSON III: "NEVER INSULT ANYONE"

LESSON 4
There were these 4 guys, a Russian, a German, an American and a French, who found this small genie bottle. When they rubbed the bottle, a genie appeared. Thankful that the 4 guys had released him out of the bottle, He said, "Next to you all are 4 swimming pools, I will give each of you A wish. When you run towards the pool and jump, you shout what you want the pool of water to become, then your wish will come true."
The French wanted to start. He ran towards the pool, jumped and shouted, "WINE".
The pool immediately changed into a pool of wine. The Frenchman was so happy swimming and drinking from the pool.
Next is the Russian's turn, he did the same and shouted, "VODKA" and immersed himself into a pool of vodka.
The German was next and he jumped and shouted, "BEER". He was so contented with his beer pool.
The last is the American. He was running towards the pool when suddenly He steps on a banana peel. He slipped towards the pool and shouted, "SHIT!!!!!!! ......... "
LESSON IV: "THINK TWICE BEFORE YOU SAY SOMETHING, BECAUSE SOMETIMES ACCIDENTS DO HAPPEN"

LESSON 5
The organs of the body were having a meeting, trying to decide who was In charge. Each organ took a turn to speak up:
Brain....... .. I should be in charge because I run all body functions.
Blood....... . I should be in charge because I circulate oxygen for the
brain.
Stomach... I should be in charge because I process food to the brain.
Legs........ . I should be in charge because I take the brain where it Wants to go.
Eyes........ . I should be in charge because I let the brain see where it's going.
Asshole..... I should be in charge because I get rid of your waste.
All the other parts laughed so hard and this made the asshole very mad.
To prove his point, the asshole immediately slammed tightly closed and Stayed that way for 6 days, refusing to rid the body of any waste whatsoever.
Day 1 - Brain got a terrible headache and cried out for relief Day 2 -
Stomach got bloated and began to ache terribly Day 3 - Legs got cramps and became unstable Day 4 - Eyes became watery and vision became blurred Day 5 - Blood became toxic and poisoned the body Day 6 -The other organs agreed to let the asshole be in charge.
MORAL OF THE STORY: "NO MATTER WHO YOU ARE, OR HOW IMPORTANT YOU THINK YOU ARE, YOU WILL FIND THAT IT IS ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE THAT IS IN CHARGE"

Lesson 6
A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower, when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs.
When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next-door neighbour. Before she says a word, Bob says, "I'll give you £800 to drop that towel." After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob. After a few seconds, Bob hands her £800 and leaves.
The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks, "Who was that?" "It was Bob the next door neighbour," she replies. "Great!" the husband says, "did he say anything about the £800 he owes me?"
lesson: If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure

Lesson 7
A priest offered a Nun a lift. She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?"
The priest removed his hand. But, changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again.
The nun once again said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?"
The priest apologised "Sorry sister but the flesh is weak."
Arriving at the convent, the nun went on her way.
On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It said, "Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory."
lesson: If you are not well informed in your job, you might miss a great opportunity.

[guru_sal]

Blue Hathi



How wud u kill a blue hathi....?
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with a blue bandook..... ..

now, how wud u kill a lal hathi??..
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First u will give him poison....n then he will become blue.....then u will kill him with the blue bandook.....

Now,how wud u kill a yellow hathi?
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First u will make him angry so that he becomes red...then u will give him posion ....so that he'll now be blue....n now u will killl him with the blue bandook....

Now, how wud kill a green hathi???(worst one)....
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u will make him sick so that he catches jaundice n turns yellow....n then make him angry so that he turns red....n again yes u guessed it right....poison him....he turns blue...n then shoot him with the blue bandook..... ..

Now.....How wud u kill a purple hathi????
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think think......
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pagal ho gaye ho kya.....purple hathi kabhi dekha hai kya????

[guru_sal]

Bride & Groom



During the wedding rehearsal, the groom approached the pastor with an unusual offer:
"Look, I''ll give you $100 if you''ll change the wedding vows. When you get to the part where I''m supposed to promise to ''love, honor and obey'' and ''be faithful to her forever,'' I''d appreciate it if you''d just leave that out."

He passed the minister a $100 bill and walked away satisfied. On the day of the wedding, when it came time for the groom''s vows, the pastor looked the young man in the eye and said:

"Will you promise to prostrate yourself before her, obey her every command and wish, serve her breakfast in bed every morning of your life, and swear eternally before God and your lovely wife that you will not ever even look at another woman, as long as you both shall live?"

The groom gulped and looked around, and said in a tiny voice, "Yes," then leaned toward the pastor and hissed: "I thought we had a deal."

The pastor put a $100 bill into the groom''s hand and whispered: "She made me a better offer."

[guru_sal]

Aapko Hasana Hamara Farz Hai



Maine kaha "Dil Ruba"
Usne kaha balance bhijwa
Maine kaha "Paise Nahi"
Usne kaha "Kaise nahi"
Maine kaha "Mehangai Hai"
Usne kaha "Ja aaj se tu mera bhai ha

HAMARI DOSTI RAYMOND JAISI NAHIN... SINCE 1925 ,
PEPSI JAISI BHI NAHIN , KE YE DIL MAANGE MORE...
YE HOGI L.I.C. JAISI ,
JINDAGI KE SAATH BHI , JINDAGI KE BAAD BHI....

boy says to girl main tum ko without tuch kiya kiss karoo ga ....girl
says ye to ho hi nahi sakta....boy says to lag hai 20 20 rupay
ki .... girl says ok....boy kissed girl titely....girl says tum ne to
mujay tuch kiya hai .....boy say ye loo 20 rupay noman

Newtons First Law of ishq
the force applied while proposing a girl by a boy is equal and
opposite
to the force applied by the girl while using her sandals (

Newtons 2nd law of ishq
the rate of change of intensity of love of a girl towards a boy is
directly proportional to the instantaneous bank balance of the boy and
the direction of this love is same to as increament or decreament of
thebank balance

Newtons First Law of Ishq
a boy in love with a girl, continue to be in love with her and a girl
in love with a boy, continue to be in love with him, untill on unless
any external agent(brother or father of the gal) comes into play and
break the legs of the boy.

Newtons Law of Romance
LOVE CAN NEITHER BE CREATED NOR BE DESTROYED,
IT CAN ONLY BE CHANGED FROM
ONE GIRL FRIEND TO ANOTHER...

itne choti nhi dosti apni,
kaise soch liya k keenara a gieya
ho gai mobile main roshni,
aur sms humara a gieya

4 roses just for you,bcoz u r special person.
1st rose for frdship,
2nd rose for good luck,
3rd rose for happiness
aur last kaan ke upper lagana mast lagega. gaurav

kasur na unka hai na mera,
hum donohi rishton ki rasmein nibhate rahe
wo dosti ka ehsaas jatate rahe
hum mohabbat ko dil mein chupate rahe

TUMHARE SATH RAHON CHAND BAAM PAR DEKHON
TUMHARE SANG HI MAIN EID KA MANZAR DEKHON
TUMHARE NAM SE BADLAY SHAYAD TAQDEER MERI
TUMHARA NAM MAIN HATHON PAY SAJA KAR DEKHON

Chale gaye ho dur kuch pal ke liye,
Dur rehkar bhi karib ho har pal ke liye,
Kaise yaad na aaye aapki ek pal ke liye,
Jab dil me ho aap harpal ke liye........

tere hontoon pe saj jaon dua honay ko ge chahta hai,
mera duniya bhula kar bas tera honay ko ge chahta hai,
yun sab ke samne ithkheliyan karti hai ye tujh se,
ke beiraada he hawa honay ko ge chahta hai.

You are a GHONCHU..
G-reat
H-ot
O-ne in million
N-aughty
C-ute
H-umble
U-nique
Zyada khush mat ho, hai to tu ghonchu hi Poonu

Saathi sirf vo to nahin hota jo jeewan bhar saath nibhaye, Saathi to
vo hota hai jo jeewan ke kuch palon mein hi jeewan bhar ka saath de
jaaye. Gud Day.

If I could have just one wish,
I would wish to wake up everyday
to the sound of your breath on my neck,
the warmth of your lips on my cheek,
the touch of your fingers on my skin,
and the feel of your heart beating with mine...
Knowing that I could never find that feeling
with anyone other than you.

R u Mail or Femail
Answer k liye
nechay dekho
-
-
-
Bewakoof yahan nahe
apne nechay dekho

SARDARNI SAY:- aji sunday o..Aj 3 dako aaye see.. unhaan nay mere
izat lut laee jay.
SARDAR SAY:- toon onhaan noo rokya naeen....?
SARDARNI REPLIES:- bohot rokya see... per o rukay e naeen.... kehen
lagay HUN SANO JAAN DAY...ASSI THAK GAEE AAN aamirmultan

Girls r special ones created by god..
if u praise her,she thinks u r tell'g lies
if u dont, u r gud 4 noth'g if she
talks,she wants u 2 listen.if u listen,
she wants u 2 talk. if u tuch her, u r not a
gentleman. if u dont, u not a man.
If u agree 2 all her likes, u r a wimp.
if u dont, u r not understand'g so
simple yet so complex, so wierd yet
so beautiful. Thats a girl...!

Na Gujarna EID ke Din kisi Masjid Ke samne se, kahi log CHAND samjkar
ROJA Na Tod de, Hokar Khafa Khuda Tumse kahi Chand Jaise Chehre
Banana na Chor De..(

Ur eyes Patakha,
ur lips Rocket,
ur ears Chakri,
ur smile Fuljadi,
ur style Anar,
ur personality Bomb.
Beta nikal le,
i'm coming with "candle

Simple bye makes us cry; Simple joke makes us laugh; Simple care
makes us fall in love; Simple touch makes us feel better but I hope
my simple SMS makes you smile!--.(

3 Fastest means of communication
1 : Tele-Phone
2 : Tele-Vision
3 : Tell-a-women
Need still faster?
Tell her not 2 tell any1...Swapnil

EK CHOTA SARDAR APNI PRAGNANT MUMMY SE POCHTA HAIN K IS MEIN KIYA
HAIN,, MUMMY BOLTI HAIN,IS MEIN PYARA BABY HAIN,SARDAR, PIYARA THAA TU
AP KHAAA Q GAEY,...(

If I could have just one wish,
I would wish to wake up everyday
to the sound of your breath on my neck,
the warmth of your lips on my cheek,
the touch of your fingers on my skin,
and the feel of your heart beating with mine...
Knowing that I could never find that feeling
with anyone other than you

Es Dil ka kaha mano ek ehsan kardo
ek benaam si muhabat mere naam krdo
mere zaat pe fakat itna ehsaan krdo
ek subah ko milo or sham krdo Zaibo

[shubha63]

sardarni 2 doctor: mera beta motorcycle se gir gaya hai. doctor: i dont know hindi, talk in english. sardarni: my londa gironda from hero honda.

[divyaashimix]

sardarni 2 doctor: mera beta motorcycle se gir gaya hai. doctor: i dont know hindi, talk in english. sardarni: my londa gironda from hero honda.
hey Shubha...
kool one yar...
hey friends.
please vote for Priya di...
pleaseeeeeee.................

[shubha63]

hey Shubha...
kool one yar...
hey friends.
please vote for Priya di...
pleaseeeeeee.................
thanks divya

[shubha63]

ladkewale: ladki ka naam kya he? ladkiwale: hamari pyaari aapki pyaari sabki pyaari RAMPYAARI. ladkiwale: ladke ka naam? ladkewale: hamara gu aapka gu sabka gu JAGGU.

[divyaashimix]

ladkewale: ladki ka naam kya he? ladkiwale: hamari pyaari aapki pyaari sabki pyaari RAMPYAARI. ladkiwale: ladke ka naam? ladkewale: hamara gu aapka gu sabka gu JAGGU.
hey bhaggggggguuuuuuuu!!!!!
gr8 work man........:D :D

[guru_sal]

sardarni 2 doctor: mera beta motorcycle se gir gaya hai. doctor: i dont know hindi, talk in english. sardarni: my londa gironda from hero honda.
hey gr8 work shubha after a long time sum 1 posted here

[tukz]

sardarni 2 doctor: mera beta motorcycle se gir gaya hai. doctor: i dont know hindi, talk in english. sardarni: my londa gironda from hero honda.
hey subha gr88888 wrk....guru kul wrk man

[tukz]

ladkewale: ladki ka naam kya he? ladkiwale: hamari pyaari aapki pyaari sabki pyaari RAMPYAARI. ladkiwale: ladke ka naam? ladkewale: hamara gu aapka gu sabka gu JAGGU.
lol gr8 1 subha

[tukz]

Santa : People consider me as a "GOD"
> Banta : How do you know??
> Santa : When I went to the Park today,
> everybody said, Oh GOD ! U
> have
> came again..
>
>
>
>
================================================== ==============
>
> Sardar complained 2 Police : Sir all items
> are missing, except the
> TV
> in my house.
> Police : How the theif did not take TV???
> Sardar : I was watching TV na....
>
>
>
================================================== ==============
>
>
> Sardar: I have'nt slept all night in the
> train.
> Friend: why? Sardar: Got upper berth.
> Friend: why did'nt you
> exchnged the birth?
> Sardar: oye, there was nobody to exchnge in
> the lower berth...
>
>
>
================================================== ===
>
> Sardar-why are all these people running?
> Man- This is a race, the winner will get the
> cup.
> Sardar-If only the winner will get the cup, why
> are others running?
>
>
>
================================================== =======
> Sardar gets ready ,wears tie, coat ,goes out,
> climbs tree, sits on
> the
> branch regularly. A man asks why he does this.
> Sardar:"I've been
> promoted as branch manager."
>
>

[guru_sal]

gud one tukz and thankz

[shubha63]

types of farters: CLEVER- pass the gas silently & sit quietly. SHY-pass slowly & smiles. ARROGANT- pass loudly & laughs. UNLUCKY- tries to fart but shits.

[animateash]

cool ones every1

[shubha63]

how many sardars are required to fix a bulb on roof...........? answer: 5. one stands on stool holding bulb, other four rotate stool to fix the bulb....

[guru_sal]

types of farters: CLEVER- pass the gas silently & sit quietly. SHY-pass slowly & smiles. ARROGANT- pass loudly & laughs. UNLUCKY- tries to fart but shits.
hey gr8 work shubha
small ones but cool

[shubha63]

hey gr8 work shubha
small ones but cool
thanks guru

[guru_sal]

yr most welcum. shubha

[guru_sal]

Teri Yaadon ke Bina koi Lamha Guzaara Nahin
Ek pal Nahin jab Tumhe Humne Pukaara Nahin
Meri Naakaamiyon Ka Itna Bhi Ghum Na Kijiye
Agar aap Jeete Hain to Main Haara Nahin
Ye Naqsh-e-Dard Kaise Utar Jaaye Chehre Se
Maine Abhi Aapka Ghum Dil se Utaara Nahin
Tere bin Youn Kat Rahi Dariya-e-Zindagi Mein
Kashti Bhi Hai Maajhi bhi hai,Kinaara Nahin
Kar Rakhaa Hai Jisne Saare Ghar Mein Ujaala
Aansu Hai Mera ye Koi Toota Hua Taara Nahin
Kisko Gale Lagaa Ke Rooyen Na-Muraad Hum
Is Bhari Duniya Mein Apna Koi Sahaara Nahin
Mareez-e-Ishq Hai Tamannai Khudkushi Ka ab
Gehre Hain Dil ke Zakhm,Aur Koi Chaara Nahin
Wo aa Ke Poonchh Den Aansu Hamari Aankhon se
Itna bhi Hamare Haq Mein Naseeb Hamara Nahin

[shubha63]

height of intelligence:- a senior student during ragging says: on first night ur wife should sleep with me. junior: ok fine, but i am going to marry your sister....

[guru_sal]

nice one shubha

[guru_sal]

sum sms

1) Kya yaar tum bi ajeeb ho, mere dil ke kitne kareeb ho, na milte ho na sms karte ho ,kya tum mujse bi jayada garib ho.....

2) Girl: if u will try 2 kiss me, mai shor macha dungi.
Boy:Lekin yaha to dur tak koi nahi hai.
Girl: i know but formality to karni hi padegi..

3) DUNIA me reh ke sapno me kho jao,
KISIKO apna banalo YA kisi ke ho jao,
AGAR kuch bhi nahi hota to DON'T WORRY yaar,
chaddar-takiya lo aur so jao.


4) Log kehte hai k khuda ne aapko badi fursat mein banaya hai.... "simple c baat hai, faltu kaam fursat mein hi to kiye jate hain".


5) 1st Child: Mere Papa Bahut Darpok Hain.
2nd Child: Why?
1st Child: Jab Bhi Road Cross Karte Hain, Meri Ungli Pakad Lete Hain aur kehte chhodna mat.


6) An old rich man marries a young girl. Interviewer ask to girl-
apne inme shadi ke liye kya dekha-
girl-ek to inki income aur doosre inke din kam.


7) Jab kisi ki taraf
DiL jhukne
lage..

Bat aa kar
zubaan tak
rukne lage

Toh

TOh

Toh

TOh

Toh

VICKS ki goli lo
Khikhich dur karo...


8) Hamari dosti ka kitna fayda uthhate ho,1msg bhej ke10 free pate ho, hamare dil par kyon zulm dhate ho,hamare msg forward kar naye -naye dost banate ho.


9) Apne roz humse nai umeed laga rakhi hai, apne dil me asha ki KIRAN jaga rakhi hai, hum roz kahan se naye msgs bhejen, hum ne kya sms ki factory laga rakhi hai.

[divyaashimix]

sum sms

1) Kya yaar tum bi ajeeb ho, mere dil ke kitne kareeb ho, na milte ho na sms karte ho ,kya tum mujse bi jayada garib ho.....

2) Girl: if u will try 2 kiss me, mai shor macha dungi.
Boy:Lekin yaha to dur tak koi nahi hai.
Girl: i know but formality to karni hi padegi..

3) DUNIA me reh ke sapno me kho jao,
KISIKO apna banalo YA kisi ke ho jao,
AGAR kuch bhi nahi hota to DON'T WORRY yaar,
chaddar-takiya lo aur so jao.


4) Log kehte hai k khuda ne aapko badi fursat mein banaya hai.... "simple c baat hai, faltu kaam fursat mein hi to kiye jate hain".


5) 1st Child: Mere Papa Bahut Darpok Hain.
2nd Child: Why?
1st Child: Jab Bhi Road Cross Karte Hain, Meri Ungli Pakad Lete Hain aur kehte chhodna mat.


6) An old rich man marries a young girl. Interviewer ask to girl-
apne inme shadi ke liye kya dekha-
girl-ek to inki income aur doosre inke din kam.


7) Jab kisi ki taraf
DiL jhukne
lage..

Bat aa kar
zubaan tak
rukne lage

Toh

TOh

Toh

TOh

Toh

VICKS ki goli lo
Khikhich dur karo...


8) Hamari dosti ka kitna fayda uthhate ho,1msg bhej ke10 free pate ho, hamare dil par kyon zulm dhate ho,hamare msg forward kar naye -naye dost banate ho.


9) Apne roz humse nai umeed laga rakhi hai, apne dil me asha ki KIRAN jaga rakhi hai, hum roz kahan se naye msgs bhejen, hum ne kya sms ki factory laga rakhi hai.

hey bhagggggguuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu........
tujhey yeh sab miltey kahaan sey hain re?

[tukz]

hey guru n subha gr8 wrk....

[shubha63]

MY EYES-MISS U.

MY FEELINGS-LUV U

MY MIND-CALLS U

MY LIFE IS U

I’LL DIE WITHOUT U

I LOVE U………




Aisa tera boyfriend mujhe bolta hai. Sambhal usko

[guru_sal]

hey bhagggggguuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu........
tujhey yeh sab miltey kahaan sey hain re?
jahaan se aapko nahi milte aur kya !!!!!

[guru_sal]

hey guru n subha gr8 wrk....
thankz tukz
but where were u ??????????

[guru_sal]

MY EYES-MISS U.

MY FEELINGS-LUV U

MY MIND-CALLS U

MY LIFE IS U

I’LL DIE WITHOUT U

I LOVE U………




Aisa tera boyfriend mujhe bolta hai. Sambhal usko
hey gr8 one
luv it

[tukz]

thankz tukz
but where were u ??????????
ur mst welcum....n am here ryte in frnt of d comp.

[guru_sal]

ur mst welcum....n am here ryte in frnt of d comp.
kamaal hai tukz
idhar main bhi comp ke agge baitha hoon.

[shubha63]

What did the male dog say 2 the female dog
in the cool nite with bright moon lite?


BOW BOW!
What else can a dog say?:confused:

………………………..


kA50 tamb fta c c
k”JMj62MINjoTG”
mw.58TA HO i9?5a
4567 46oBRIdjmjb
tg5mtg



kamala hai yaar! Kuch bhi bhejo padlethe ho………..
kaunse university me padthe the.:p


……………………..........................

in art gallery couple sees picture of a naked girl covered by a leaf.
Husband keeps watching.
Wife: ab chaloge ya HAVA aane ka intezar karte rahoge!:mad:

……………………………..

Stars + moon = romantic nights

Birds + sky = lovely day.

Forest + animals = beautiful world.

You + your smile


CHI CHI!
GO AND BRUSH YOUR TEETH:D

[guru_sal]

What did the male dog say 2 the female dog
in the cool nite with bright moon lite?


BOW BOW!
What else can a dog say?:confused:

………………………..


kA50 tamb fta c c
k”JMj62MINjoTG”
mw.58TA HO i9?5a
4567 46oBRIdjmjb
tg5mtg



kamala hai yaar! Kuch bhi bhejo padlethe ho………..
kaunse university me padthe the.:p


……………………..........................

in art gallery couple sees picture of a naked girl covered by a leaf.
Husband keeps watching.
Wife: ab chaloge ya HAVA aane ka intezar karte rahoge!:mad:

……………………………..

Stars + moon = romantic nights

Birds + sky = lovely day.

Forest + animals = beautiful world.

You + your smile


CHI CHI!
GO AND BRUSH YOUR TEETH:D
gr8 work shubha .
cool ones !!!

[shubha63]

gr8 work shubha .
cool ones !!!
thanks guru

[animateash]

all of u cool wrk.............

[guru_sal]

thanks guru
yr welcum................

[guru_sal]

Agar Laloo Hamra PM Ban Jaaye
~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~

What would change, if Laloo Prasad becomes India's Prime Minister

National Anthem: Khana Pina Adhik Zaroorat hai...

National Attire: Dhoti & Kurta

National Drink: Fresh Buffalo Milk

National Animal: Buffalo

National Sport: Milking Buffalo (morning)

Buffalo Race: (evening)

Corporate Language: Enlish-va

National Toy: A. K. 58

National Family Planning Policy: Hum Do, Humare Dozen

National Documentry Philm: Laloo Ban Gaya Gentleman

National Vehicle: Buffalo Cart

National Recreation: Pro-creation

Laloo's Slogan: "Jab Tak Rahega Samosa Me Aloo, Tab Tak Rahega Hamara P.M. Laloo"
~~~~~~~~~~~~

[guru_sal]

Love Express



When U Were Only 5 Yrs Old, I Said I Love U...

U Asked Me: "What Is It?"



When U Were 15 Yrs Old, I Said I Love U....

U Blushed.. U Look Down And Smile..



When U Were 20 Yrs Old, I Said I Love U....

U Put Ur Head On My Shoulder And

Hold My Hand.. Afraid That I Might Dissapear..



When U Were 25 Yrs Old, I Said I Love U....

U Prepare Breakfast And Serve It In

Front Of Me, And Kiss My Forhead N

Said : "U Better Be Quick, Is's Gonna Be Late.."



When U Were 30 Yrs Old, I Said I Love U....

U Said: "If U Really Love Me, Please

Come Back Early After Work.."



When U Were 40 Yrs Old, I Said I Love U....

U Were Cleaning The Dining Table And

Said: "Ok Dear, But It's Time For U To Help Our Child With His/Her Revision.."



When U Were 50 Yrs Old, I Said I Love U....

U Were Knitting And U Laugh At Me..



When U Were 60 Yrs Old, I Said I Love U....

U Smile At Me..



When U Were 70 Yrs Old. I Said I Love U....

We Sitting On The Rocking Chair With Our Glasses On.. I'm Reading Your Love Letter That U Sent To Me 50 Yrs Ago..

With Our Hand Crossing Together..



When U Were 80 Yrs Old, U Said U Love Me!

I Didn't Say Anything But Cried..



That Day Must Be The Happiest Day Of My Life! Because U Said U Love Me!!!!!!!













Please Express your Love & Appreciate Your Loved Ones.. Say "I Love You" To Them When U Have The Chance Now!!! Now!!! Now!!!

[tukz]

hey guru nice 1

[guru_sal]

hey guru nice 1
thankuuuu tukz

[divyaashimix]

hey guru.....
that was a kool one re !!!!!!!!:) :) :) :)

[guru_sal]

hey guru.....
that was a kool one re !!!!!!!!:) :) :) :)
THANKUUU RE

[guru_sal]

Munna bhai: Agar bina danto ka kutta kate to kya karna chahiye?
Circuit: Simple bhai... Bina sui ka injection lagane ka!



Narad Muni dharti par madira peene aaye,12 botal pilane k baad
Theke wala: Apko chadhti kyun nahi ?
Narad: Main Bhagwaan Hoon.
Theke wala: Chad gayi saley ko.

Jija: Sali ji, aapke yahan ki sabse mash-hoor cheez kaunsi hai?
Sali: Jija ji, jo mash-hoor thi, usey to aap le gaye!

Q: Agar do pipal ke Pedon ko ek rassi se bandh diya jaye to us rassi ko kya kahenge?
A: Us rassi ko bolengey NOKIA - Connecting pipal.

Kuri waley Munde nu: Tusi nonveg khandey ho?
Munda: Haan
Sharaab?
Haan
Drugs?
Haan
Jua?
Haan
Sab kuch negative hai, kuch positive ve hai?
Munda: Haanji, HIV+

Gal: Is dress ka kya price hai?
Shopkeeper: Sirf 5 kiss.
Girl: Aur us dress ka?
Shopkeeper: 10 kiss.
Girl: Dono dress pack kar do, bill dadi dengi.

Sachin's Daughter: Yeh Kya, Daddy Sixer pe Sixer maare jaa rahe hain Hain?
Sachin's Wife: Arey beta, yeh toh ADVERTISEMENT Hai !

Ab tak meri life ek khuli botal thi,
jis mein se sab perfume ki tarah ud jata tha.
Par aap ke aane se sab kuch ruk gaya,
Bhagwan kare aap jaisa DHAKKAN sabko miley.

Santa: Tommy ne meri saari kitaab kha layi
Mother: Ohnu mere kole leke aa mein usnu saja dewan
Santa: Saja ta mein de diti, usdi kauli wala dudh mein pee gaya

Manmohan Singh: We are sending Indians to the moon next year!
Bush: Wow! Howc many?
Manamohan: 25 OBC, 25 SC, 20 ST, 5 Handicapped, 5 Sports Persons, 5 Terrorist Affected, 5 Kashmiri Migrants, 9 Politicians & if possible 1 Astronnaut

1980 girls: Maan mei Jeans pehanungi
Maan : Nahin beti log kya kahengey?
2006 girls: Maan mein mini skirt pehanungi
Maan: Pehen le beti kuch to pehan le!

Lamha Lamha Waqt Guzar Jayega,
Chand Lamhon Men Exam Sar Pe Ajayega,
Abhi Bhi Waqt Hai Do Line Padh Lo,
Warna Paas Kia Munna Bhai Karwae Ga!

Generation Next Motto: Na hum shaadi karenge, na apne bachchon ko karne denge.



Basanti: Bhaag Dhanno bhag, aaj teri Basanti ki izzat ka sawal hai.
Dhanno: Tujhe apni padi hai. Meri soch jiske peeche Gabbar ke 10 ghode pade hain

[divyaashimix]

hey bhagguuuuu!!!!!!!!!!!

dam koolll !!!!!!:D :D

[animateash]

coool ones every1..................................

[guru_sal]

hey bhagguuuuu!!!!!!!!!!!

dam koolll !!!!!!:D :D
thanks divu ..........

[guru_sal]

coool ones every1..................................
thankz aashni

[shubha63]

LATE BED WAKINGS………

LIGHT BREAKFASTS………

BUS STAND FIGHTS……..

FOOT BOARD TRAVELS………

LATE ATTENDENCE……….

LONG INTERVALS………

SHARING CANTEEN FOODS……….

MANY PROPOSALS………….

MOBILES IN SILENT MODE…..

SOME ADULT MESSAGES………..

LATE NIGHT CHATS………

SOME MISUNDERSTANDINGS………

STRUGGLE FOR MARKS………

MASS BUNK……..

FRIDAY MOVIES……..

ENJOYING GROUP ARGUMENTS……..

FRESHERS DAY……….

AND………

FAREWELL DAY WITH TEARS……….


“COLLEGE LIFE IS NOTHING BUT A HEAVEN”
Am I right?

[divyaashimix]

hey bhaggu SHUBHA.........
great work re...
where do you get them from girl????????? :D ;) ;) ;)

[guru_sal]

LATE BED WAKINGS………

LIGHT BREAKFASTS………

BUS STAND FIGHTS……..

FOOT BOARD TRAVELS………

LATE ATTENDENCE……….

LONG INTERVALS………

SHARING CANTEEN FOODS……….

MANY PROPOSALS………….

MOBILES IN SILENT MODE…..

SOME ADULT MESSAGES………..

LATE NIGHT CHATS………

SOME MISUNDERSTANDINGS………

STRUGGLE FOR MARKS………

MASS BUNK……..

FRIDAY MOVIES……..

ENJOYING GROUP ARGUMENTS……..

FRESHERS DAY……….

AND………

FAREWELL DAY WITH TEARS……….


“COLLEGE LIFE IS NOTHING BUT A HEAVEN”
Am I right?
hey shubha gr8 one

[shubha63]

hey shubha gr8 one thanks guru

[guru_sal]

thanks guru
yr most welcum

[guru_sal]

Wo meri Zindagi hai



Wo jo ki door door se hamein jalaate rahe..
Unhi ki yaad mein ham khud ko mitaate rahe..

kaash ki wo bagaawat kar de iis bedard jamaane se..
Iisee dua se haath khudaa ke saamane uthaate rahe..

Hai hamein aaj bhi pyaar unse,magar ye kaise kahoon..
Kyonki har modd par we hamko nafrat dikhaate rahe..

Uunke yaadon ke diye mujhse bujhaaye na gaye..
Yaad utnaa hi aaye wo,jitnaa ham uunhe bhulaate rahe


Bhool to jaata tumhe,magar bhulaaya nahin hai...
Hamne waadon se apna,daaman chuddayaa nahin hai...
Juda to ho gaye ham magar,milne ki tamanna baki hai..
Isseliye to kisi aur se, mene Dil lagaaya nahin hai..


Zindagi ki raahon mein bahut se yaar milenge,
Hum kya humse bhi achhe hazaar milenge,
In achhon ki bheed mein humein naa bhula dena,
Hum kahan aapko baar baar milenge.
luti wafaon ka ab aitbar mat kerna
gae dinon ka kabhi intizar mat kerna
mohabaton ka junun tum ko tor dale ga
mohabaton k samander ko par mat kerna
yeh khuwab ankhon ko ik din jala k rakh dain ge
kabhi bhi sapnon ki dehleez par mat kerna
sukhon ka khoon na kerna tum apne hathon se
kabhi bhi piyar ka khud ko shakar mat kerna
yeh ishq laakh chupao kabhi nahi chupta
safer k shok main paon figar mat kerna


Pyaar ka koi bhed na jaane
jaane kaise hota hai.
Humne tumko apna mana
jaane kaise hota hai.
Ehsaas tumhara hardam rehna
jaane kaise hota hai.
Bin bole sab kuch keh jaana
jaane kaise hota hai.
Rooh mein sama ke aankho mein aana
jaine kaise hota hai.
Is pyaar ka koi mol na jaane
jaane kaise hota hai.


Aansu jo beh rahey hein inhein behney do
Yeh keh rahey hein dil ki baat, kehney do
Buhat bawafa ho tum, yeh ham ko hai maloom
Tum apni wafa ki baat, apney tak hi rehney do!
Mila to kia mila tumhein chahney kay baad
Bas dukh hi seh rahein hein, hamein sehney do
Tum ney to keh dala sab haal-e-dil apna
Ab mujh ko apni daastaan bhi kehney do
Mar gaye auroon kay liye ham Sanaam~
Tum apni khatir ham ko Zinda rehney do


jo rehtay hain sada dil mein unhain dhoonda nahi kertay
jo ruch jain rag o pay mein unhain socha nahi kertay...
baharon kay ghanay saye mein tulkhi bhi, chubhan bhi hai
gamon ki dhoop ka tum say mager shikva nahi kertay...
nahi aatay kabhi bhi laot ker guzray huay maosam
barastay badlon ki aas mein trsa nahi kertay...
tajasus aur berhta hai machal jatay hain sun ker hum
achanak piyar ki baton ka rukh mora nahi kertay...
teri nazer e inayat say huay jatay hain jo ghayal
unhain qatil nigahoon say kabhi dekha nahi kertay...


Mujhey lagta hai aisa kabhi kabhi
Jaisy woh ajnabi larki
Mujh se pyar karti hai Mujhey chahti hai
Akser yunhi chup chup ker Dekhti hai,
janey kiya sooch ker Nazrein chura jati hai
Kuch ghabra si jati hai
Apney aanchal ko hawaoon k zoor per lehrati hai
Mehsoos mujhey yeh hota hai k
Shayad mujhey woh bohat chahti hai
Mujhey aisa ehsas dilati hai
jesay Woh mujh sey kuch kehna chahti hai
meray pochnay per kuch sharma si jati hai
Kuch ghabra si jati hai
"Suniyey" keh kar bhaag jati hai
Ajnabi larki shayad pyaar karti hai mujh sey
Aesa mehsoos hota hai janey kiyon mujhey
Dil bhi kitna pagal hai Kiya kiya sochta rehta hai
Kuch masoom se jazbey hain
Kuch undekhey sapney hain
Mager woh nahin janti shayad...!!! Woh Meri Zindagi Hai......

[guru_sal]

Santa Banta SMS:

Accident took place. Crowd gathered. Sardar reporter couldnt get in. Clever Santa Singh cried Mera bapu. Crowd made way 4him bt it was a donkeys accident.

Banta: Oye, tu to Doctor ke paas jaane waala tha, kya hua?
Santa: Yaar kal jaaonga, aaj thodi tabiyat kharab hai.

Sardar proposed a Girl...... Girl said Im 1yr elder to you...... Sardar said Oye No Problem Soniye, Ill marry you NEXT YEAR.

American: In our country , marriage even takes place with email. Santa: In India, it is only with a female.

Q: A Man asked Santa, "Akal badhi ya bhains? "
A: Santa bola, "Pehle date of birth to batao."

Banta: Name the 3 fastest means of communication.
Santa: Telephone, Television, Tell-a-woman

Banta: J tu dasde ki is bag vich ki hai tan sare ande tere, j tu dasde kine ne tan 8 de 8 tere, te j tu dasde ki kidhe ne tan oh murgi v teri.
Santa: Koi hint?

Santa suffering from constipation, sitting on toilet seat: Ooonh, oooonh, oohh.... nee aaja marjaniye main tenu khan ta ni laga.

Q: Why Santa is standing below the Tube light with an open mouth.
A: Because Doctor has advised him: 'Aaj Light Khana hai!'

Santa went out to buy an Indian flag. The shop owner gave him the flag. Guess what did he ask next...
Ismein aur colour dikhayiye.

[guru_sal]

Wo meri Zindagi hai



Wo jo ki door door se hamein jalaate rahe..
Unhi ki yaad mein ham khud ko mitaate rahe..

kaash ki wo bagaawat kar de iis bedard jamaane se..
Iisee dua se haath khudaa ke saamane uthaate rahe..

Hai hamein aaj bhi pyaar unse,magar ye kaise kahoon..
Kyonki har modd par we hamko nafrat dikhaate rahe..

Uunke yaadon ke diye mujhse bujhaaye na gaye..
Yaad utnaa hi aaye wo,jitnaa ham uunhe bhulaate rahe


Bhool to jaata tumhe,magar bhulaaya nahin hai...
Hamne waadon se apna,daaman chuddayaa nahin hai...
Juda to ho gaye ham magar,milne ki tamanna baki hai..
Isseliye to kisi aur se, mene Dil lagaaya nahin hai..


Zindagi ki raahon mein bahut se yaar milenge,
Hum kya humse bhi achhe hazaar milenge,
In achhon ki bheed mein humein naa bhula dena,
Hum kahan aapko baar baar milenge.
luti wafaon ka ab aitbar mat kerna
gae dinon ka kabhi intizar mat kerna
mohabaton ka junun tum ko tor dale ga
mohabaton k samander ko par mat kerna
yeh khuwab ankhon ko ik din jala k rakh dain ge
kabhi bhi sapnon ki dehleez par mat kerna
sukhon ka khoon na kerna tum apne hathon se
kabhi bhi piyar ka khud ko shakar mat kerna
yeh ishq laakh chupao kabhi nahi chupta
safer k shok main paon figar mat kerna


Pyaar ka koi bhed na jaane
jaane kaise hota hai.
Humne tumko apna mana
jaane kaise hota hai.
Ehsaas tumhara hardam rehna
jaane kaise hota hai.
Bin bole sab kuch keh jaana
jaane kaise hota hai.
Rooh mein sama ke aankho mein aana
jaine kaise hota hai.
Is pyaar ka koi mol na jaane
jaane kaise hota hai.


Aansu jo beh rahey hein inhein behney do
Yeh keh rahey hein dil ki baat, kehney do
Buhat bawafa ho tum, yeh ham ko hai maloom
Tum apni wafa ki baat, apney tak hi rehney do!
Mila to kia mila tumhein chahney kay baad
Bas dukh hi seh rahein hein, hamein sehney do
Tum ney to keh dala sab haal-e-dil apna
Ab mujh ko apni daastaan bhi kehney do
Mar gaye auroon kay liye ham Sanaam~
Tum apni khatir ham ko Zinda rehney do


jo rehtay hain sada dil mein unhain dhoonda nahi kertay
jo ruch jain rag o pay mein unhain socha nahi kertay...
baharon kay ghanay saye mein tulkhi bhi, chubhan bhi hai
gamon ki dhoop ka tum say mager shikva nahi kertay...
nahi aatay kabhi bhi laot ker guzray huay maosam
barastay badlon ki aas mein trsa nahi kertay...
tajasus aur berhta hai machal jatay hain sun ker hum
achanak piyar ki baton ka rukh mora nahi kertay...
teri nazer e inayat say huay jatay hain jo ghayal
unhain qatil nigahoon say kabhi dekha nahi kertay...


Mujhey lagta hai aisa kabhi kabhi
Jaisy woh ajnabi larki
Mujh se pyar karti hai Mujhey chahti hai
Akser yunhi chup chup ker Dekhti hai,
janey kiya sooch ker Nazrein chura jati hai
Kuch ghabra si jati hai
Apney aanchal ko hawaoon k zoor per lehrati hai
Mehsoos mujhey yeh hota hai k
Shayad mujhey woh bohat chahti hai
Mujhey aisa ehsas dilati hai
jesay Woh mujh sey kuch kehna chahti hai
meray pochnay per kuch sharma si jati hai
Kuch ghabra si jati hai
"Suniyey" keh kar bhaag jati hai
Ajnabi larki shayad pyaar karti hai mujh sey
Aesa mehsoos hota hai janey kiyon mujhey
Dil bhi kitna pagal hai Kiya kiya sochta rehta hai
Kuch masoom se jazbey hain
Kuch undekhey sapney hain
Mager woh nahin janti shayad...!!! Woh Meri Zindagi Hai......

[divyaashimix]

Wo meri Zindagi hai



Wo jo ki door door se hamein jalaate rahe..
Unhi ki yaad mein ham khud ko mitaate rahe..

kaash ki wo bagaawat kar de iis bedard jamaane se..
Iisee dua se haath khudaa ke saamane uthaate rahe..

Hai hamein aaj bhi pyaar unse,magar ye kaise kahoon..
Kyonki har modd par we hamko nafrat dikhaate rahe..

Uunke yaadon ke diye mujhse bujhaaye na gaye..
Yaad utnaa hi aaye wo,jitnaa ham uunhe bhulaate rahe


Bhool to jaata tumhe,magar bhulaaya nahin hai...
Hamne waadon se apna,daaman chuddayaa nahin hai...
Juda to ho gaye ham magar,milne ki tamanna baki hai..
Isseliye to kisi aur se, mene Dil lagaaya nahin hai..


Zindagi ki raahon mein bahut se yaar milenge,
Hum kya humse bhi achhe hazaar milenge,
In achhon ki bheed mein humein naa bhula dena,
Hum kahan aapko baar baar milenge.
luti wafaon ka ab aitbar mat kerna
gae dinon ka kabhi intizar mat kerna
mohabaton ka junun tum ko tor dale ga
mohabaton k samander ko par mat kerna
yeh khuwab ankhon ko ik din jala k rakh dain ge
kabhi bhi sapnon ki dehleez par mat kerna
sukhon ka khoon na kerna tum apne hathon se
kabhi bhi piyar ka khud ko shakar mat kerna
yeh ishq laakh chupao kabhi nahi chupta
safer k shok main paon figar mat kerna


Pyaar ka koi bhed na jaane
jaane kaise hota hai.
Humne tumko apna mana
jaane kaise hota hai.
Ehsaas tumhara hardam rehna
jaane kaise hota hai.
Bin bole sab kuch keh jaana
jaane kaise hota hai.
Rooh mein sama ke aankho mein aana
jaine kaise hota hai.
Is pyaar ka koi mol na jaane
jaane kaise hota hai.


Aansu jo beh rahey hein inhein behney do
Yeh keh rahey hein dil ki baat, kehney do
Buhat bawafa ho tum, yeh ham ko hai maloom
Tum apni wafa ki baat, apney tak hi rehney do!
Mila to kia mila tumhein chahney kay baad
Bas dukh hi seh rahein hein, hamein sehney do
Tum ney to keh dala sab haal-e-dil apna
Ab mujh ko apni daastaan bhi kehney do
Mar gaye auroon kay liye ham Sanaam~
Tum apni khatir ham ko Zinda rehney do


jo rehtay hain sada dil mein unhain dhoonda nahi kertay
jo ruch jain rag o pay mein unhain socha nahi kertay...
baharon kay ghanay saye mein tulkhi bhi, chubhan bhi hai
gamon ki dhoop ka tum say mager shikva nahi kertay...
nahi aatay kabhi bhi laot ker guzray huay maosam
barastay badlon ki aas mein trsa nahi kertay...
tajasus aur berhta hai machal jatay hain sun ker hum
achanak piyar ki baton ka rukh mora nahi kertay...
teri nazer e inayat say huay jatay hain jo ghayal
unhain qatil nigahoon say kabhi dekha nahi kertay...


Mujhey lagta hai aisa kabhi kabhi
Jaisy woh ajnabi larki
Mujh se pyar karti hai Mujhey chahti hai
Akser yunhi chup chup ker Dekhti hai,
janey kiya sooch ker Nazrein chura jati hai
Kuch ghabra si jati hai
Apney aanchal ko hawaoon k zoor per lehrati hai
Mehsoos mujhey yeh hota hai k
Shayad mujhey woh bohat chahti hai
Mujhey aisa ehsas dilati hai
jesay Woh mujh sey kuch kehna chahti hai
meray pochnay per kuch sharma si jati hai
Kuch ghabra si jati hai
"Suniyey" keh kar bhaag jati hai
Ajnabi larki shayad pyaar karti hai mujh sey
Aesa mehsoos hota hai janey kiyon mujhey
Dil bhi kitna pagal hai Kiya kiya sochta rehta hai
Kuch masoom se jazbey hain
Kuch undekhey sapney hain
Mager woh nahin janti shayad...!!! Woh Meri Zindagi Hai......
hey bhaggu!
dam kool !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:D

[tukz]

hey guru brilliant job

Santa : What is the meaning of SMS ?
Banta : It Means...
S - Sardaro ka
M - Mazaak udane ki
S - Service

2. Sardarji opens his lunch box in the middle of the road....why ?
Just to confirm whether he is going to or coming back from the office

3. A sardar saw a beautiful girl.
he went and kissed her.
GIRL: "stupid,what are you doin...?"
Sardar: " B.Com Final Year....

4. Santa was driving car zigzag on the road.
Traffic inspector stopped him.
Santa: Sir, I am learning the car.
Inspector: without instructor?
Santa: Sir, this is a correspondence course.

5. Once a school teacher told kids to write an essay on cricket match. Everybody was busy writing except santa, he wrote "Match cancelled due to rain".

6. Petrol ke rate badhne par Santa bola: "Menu koi farak nahin penda. Pehle bhi 100 ka bharwata tha ab bhi 100 ka bharwata hoon."

7. A lady calls Santa for repairing door bell.
Santa does not turns up for 4 days.
Lady calls again, Santa replies: I am coming daily from 4 days, I press the bell, but no one comes out.

8. Santa khali kadahi me chammach chala raha tha to Banta ne poocha kya bana rahe ho?
Santa- BEWAKOOF bana raha hoon..

9. A man told santa: Banta is kissing your wife.
Santa hurriedly rushed to home, within half hour came back angrily and slapped the man and said: He is not Banta.

10. Santa is repeatedly buying movie tickets.
On being asked, santa replied: A man standing at the entry, tears my ticket everytime.

[guru_sal]

hey guru brilliant job

Santa : What is the meaning of SMS ?
Banta : It Means...
S - Sardaro ka
M - Mazaak udane ki
S - Service

2. Sardarji opens his lunch box in the middle of the road....why ?
Just to confirm whether he is going to or coming back from the office

3. A sardar saw a beautiful girl.
he went and kissed her.
GIRL: "stupid,what are you doin...?"
Sardar: " B.Com Final Year....

4. Santa was driving car zigzag on the road.
Traffic inspector stopped him.
Santa: Sir, I am learning the car.
Inspector: without instructor?
Santa: Sir, this is a correspondence course.

5. Once a school teacher told kids to write an essay on cricket match. Everybody was busy writing except santa, he wrote "Match cancelled due to rain".

6. Petrol ke rate badhne par Santa bola: "Menu koi farak nahin penda. Pehle bhi 100 ka bharwata tha ab bhi 100 ka bharwata hoon."

7. A lady calls Santa for repairing door bell.
Santa does not turns up for 4 days.
Lady calls again, Santa replies: I am coming daily from 4 days, I press the bell, but no one comes out.

8. Santa khali kadahi me chammach chala raha tha to Banta ne poocha kya bana rahe ho?
Santa- BEWAKOOF bana raha hoon..

9. A man told santa: Banta is kissing your wife.
Santa hurriedly rushed to home, within half hour came back angrily and slapped the man and said: He is not Banta.

10. Santa is repeatedly buying movie tickets.
On being asked, santa replied: A man standing at the entry, tears my ticket everytime.
thankz tukz
and dese r awesome

[guru_sal]

hey bhaggu!
dam kool !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:D
thankz divya

[shubha63]

hey guru brilliant job

Santa : What is the meaning of SMS ?
Banta : It Means...
S - Sardaro ka
M - Mazaak udane ki
S - Service

2. Sardarji opens his lunch box in the middle of the road....why ?
Just to confirm whether he is going to or coming back from the office

3. A sardar saw a beautiful girl.
he went and kissed her.
GIRL: "stupid,what are you doin...?"
Sardar: " B.Com Final Year....

4. Santa was driving car zigzag on the road.
Traffic inspector stopped him.
Santa: Sir, I am learning the car.
Inspector: without instructor?
Santa: Sir, this is a correspondence course.

5. Once a school teacher told kids to write an essay on cricket match. Everybody was busy writing except santa, he wrote "Match cancelled due to rain".

6. Petrol ke rate badhne par Santa bola: "Menu koi farak nahin penda. Pehle bhi 100 ka bharwata tha ab bhi 100 ka bharwata hoon."

7. A lady calls Santa for repairing door bell.
Santa does not turns up for 4 days.
Lady calls again, Santa replies: I am coming daily from 4 days, I press the bell, but no one comes out.

8. Santa khali kadahi me chammach chala raha tha to Banta ne poocha kya bana rahe ho?
Santa- BEWAKOOF bana raha hoon..

9. A man told santa: Banta is kissing your wife.
Santa hurriedly rushed to home, within half hour came back angrily and slapped the man and said: He is not Banta.

10. Santa is repeatedly buying movie tickets.
On being asked, santa replied: A man standing at the entry, tears my ticket everytime.
hey tukz. jokes are too gooooooooood

[shubha63]

A young man tries to talk with a girl- “I have seen u some where…”

The girl replied- “quite possible. I’m nurse in a mental hospital”

____________________________

Santa: oye tera ek daant Blue kaise ho gaya?

Banta: yaar maine ink lagayi hai.

Santa: wo kyon?

Banta: are tujhe pata nahi. Aaj kal BLUE TOOTH ka fashion hai?

______________________________

a sardar reads a poster outside a police station.

WANTED!!!
:eek:

For murder & rape.


Sardar goes inside & says “sir I want to apply for this job”

[guru_sal]

A young man tries to talk with a girl- “I have seen u some where…”

The girl replied- “quite possible. I’m nurse in a mental hospital”

____________________________

Santa: oye tera ek daant Blue kaise ho gaya?

Banta: yaar maine ink lagayi hai.

Santa: wo kyon?

Banta: are tujhe pata nahi. Aaj kal BLUE TOOTH ka fashion hai?

______________________________

a sardar reads a poster outside a police station.

WANTED!!!
:eek:

For murder & rape.


Sardar goes inside & says “sir I want to apply for this job”
hey shubha gr8 work
cool ones

[shubha63]

hey shubha gr8 work
cool ones
10x guru........

[guru_sal]

10x guru........
YR MOST WELCUM

[guru_sal]

Laughter Challenge


Bar Girl ka Interview (click on the link below)
Bachpan Kee Yaadein (click on the link below)
http://www.foolzpar adize.org/ viewtopic. php?t=10664



Raju Shrivastava' s Unseen Comedies (click on the link below)
http://www.foolzpar adize.org/ viewtopic. php?t=9269 (Raju Shrivastava' s Unseen Comedies (click on the link below))

[guru_sal]

Gabbar Singh ka Budhapa (click on the link below)

Gym ke Side Effects (click on the link below)
http://www.foolzpar adize.org/ viewtopic. php?t=10665 (Gym ke Side Effects (click on the link below))

Shaadi par Vichar Vimarsh (click on the link below)

[tukz]

thnx a lot guru,shubha....awsome job both of u

[guru_sal]

thnx a lot guru,shubha....awsome job both of u
thankz tukz
yr welcum

[shubha63]

thnx a lot guru,shubha....awsome job both of u
thanks tukz

[tukz]

netime gur un shubha

[guru_sal]

When your heart is breaking
reach for someone close to you.
Hold them tight.
They'll tell you everything will be allright.
It won't be without a fight,
but we must not lose sight
of the goal of peace.
We must destroy the hatred,
and trust in God
that he is watching over us.
In this we can trust.
He won't let us down.

[tukz]

When your heart is breaking
reach for someone close to you.
Hold them tight.
They'll tell you everything will be allright.
It won't be without a fight,
but we must not lose sight
of the goal of peace.
We must destroy the hatred,
and trust in God
that he is watching over us.
In this we can trust.
He won't let us down.

nice 1 guru

[guru_sal]

nice 1 guru
thankuuuuuuuuuu

[tukz]

thankuuuuuuuuuu
ur msssssssssst welcum

[guru_sal]

Santa and Banta were fixing a bomb in a car.
Santa : What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing.
Banta : Dont worry, I have one more.



Santa joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the computer.
Boss was happy and asked what you did till evening.
Santa : Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright.



Sardar got into a bus on 1st April when conductor asked for ticket. He gave Rs.10/- and took the ticket and said April fool. I have pass.



Sardar: For the past one week a girl is disturbing Me.
I don't know how she got my no, she interrupts whenever I call someone and says "please recharge your card"


A Sardar & his wife filed an application for Divorce.
Judge asked: How'll U divide your kids, U have 3 children?
Sardar replied: Ok! We'll apply NEXT YEAR

Postman: I Had To Come 5 Miles to Deliver U This Packet
Santa: why did U come so far. Instead U could Have posted it....

[guru_sal]

What is full form of A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H A Boy Can Do Everything For Girls heart



You're eyes are soft en tender,as sweet as they can be. There's one thing you must remember, you are the one for me!!!


Can you see me? no? Turn around, can you see me now? no? Turn again, can you see me now? I can see you because you have a special place in my heart!




In life when u get troubles, don't get nervous......just close ur eyes and follow ur HEART...... HEART may be in left..... but it always right! and loves u

[tukz]

hey guru kul wrkk.....

[guru_sal]

hey guru kul wrkk.....
thankuu tukz

[guru_sal]

This is not a joke... If you can pass, you can safely turn on your ignition
key again and cancel your annual eye examination. ..
Can you find the "C" ??? (Good exercise for the eyes!) Be ready to go blind.


OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOCOOOOOOOOO OOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOO


Once you've found the C..........




Find the 6!


9999999999999999999 999999999999999
9999999999999999999 999999999999999
9999999999999999999 999999999999999
9999999999999999999 999999999999999
9999999999999999999 999999999999999
9999999999999999999 999999999999999
9999699999999999999 999999999999999
9999999999999999999 999999999999999
9999999999999999999 999999999999999
9999999999999999999 999999999999999
9999999999999999999 999999999999999
9999999999999999999 999999999999999


Once you've found the 6...

Find the N! (it's hard!!)

MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMNMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM

Once you've found the N...
make a wish!



OK, now that you've made a wish, it will come true.....all you have to do
is send this on saying , "Can you find the "C"?


Now if you still can't do it, you have another way of doing it scroll down.




>>>>>



>>>>


>>>>>>




>>>>>>



>>>>
arre jo main bolunga wohi karoge kya!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

[guru_sal]

When you feel that nobody loves you, that nobody cares, when all you can do is cry and walk away because everyone is against you, then you are the weakest link. Goodbye!

The only person who can make her smile is a dentist.

Those innocent eyes... Those kissable lips... A great smile... The perfect walk... Smoothest talk... Absolutely gorgeous.. That's enough bout me. How about you?

Newsflash: Police are looking for a suspect who's smart, sexy, witty and very gorgeous. They've already eliminated you from the list of suspects. Where do you think I should hide?

I'm so sorry for not telling you this before. You ought to know how smart, cute, witty, sweet, charming, alluring and wonderful you are!... I didn't know I've influenced you that much!

[tukz]

This is not a joke... If you can pass, you can safely turn on your ignition
key again and cancel your annual eye examination. ..
Can you find the "C" ??? (Good exercise for the eyes!) Be ready to go blind.


OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOCOOOOOOOOO OOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOO


Once you've found the C..........




Find the 6!


9999999999999999999 999999999999999
9999999999999999999 999999999999999
9999999999999999999 999999999999999
9999999999999999999 999999999999999
9999999999999999999 999999999999999
9999999999999999999 999999999999999
9999699999999999999 999999999999999
9999999999999999999 999999999999999
9999999999999999999 999999999999999
9999999999999999999 999999999999999
9999999999999999999 999999999999999
9999999999999999999 999999999999999


Once you've found the 6...

Find the N! (it's hard!!)

MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMNMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM

Once you've found the N...
make a wish!



OK, now that you've made a wish, it will come true.....all you have to do
is send this on saying , "Can you find the "C"?


Now if you still can't do it, you have another way of doing it scroll down.




>>>>>



>>>>


>>>>>>




>>>>>>



>>>>
arre jo main bolunga wohi karoge kya!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11
hey guru gud 1 n ya i found d c,6,n alryte c is on d 5th line rm bttm.....6 on d 6th line frm d botton.....n n on d 4yth line frm d top

[guru_sal]

hey guru gud 1 n ya i found d c,6,n alryte c is on d 5th line rm bttm.....6 on d 6th line frm d botton.....n n on d 4yth line frm d top
THANKZ TUKZ
YA U RITE

[shubha63]

Some of the best moments in life:
# Lying in the bed listening to the rain outside.

# Thinking about the person u love

# Taking a long drive on a calm road.

# Finding money in your old dress just when you needed.

# Giggling naughtily over silly jokes.

# Holding hands with your friend.

# Getting a hug from someone you love.

# The moment your eyes fill with tears after a big laugh.

Wishing all these moments in your life again & again,

Merry Christmas & Happy New Year

[guru_sal]

Some of the best moments in life:
# Lying in the bed listening to the rain outside.

# Thinking about the person u love

# Taking a long drive on a calm road.

# Finding money in your old dress just when you needed.

# Giggling naughtily over silly jokes.

# Holding hands with your friend.

# Getting a hug from someone you love.

# The moment your eyes fill with tears after a big laugh.

Wishing all these moments in your life again & again,

Merry Christmas & Happy New Year
COOL ONE SHUBHA

[guru_sal]

Life is not measured by breaths we take in a moment but by the moments that take our breath away

It's better to be hated for who you are than loved for what your not

If u can stay calm while every1 else is goin mad... u probably havnt completely understood the situation

A Person Who Asks A Question Is A Fool For Five Minutes. A Person Who Doesn't Is A Fool Forever

You might regret what you do- but you'll you regret what you don't do SO much more


What do you do when the only person who can stop you crying, is the person who makes you cry in the first place?

[tukz]

hey gur ur welcum n subha n guru awsome wrk

[shubha63]

hey gur ur welcum n subha n guru awsome wrk
thanks tukz

[shubha63]

COOL ONE SHUBHA
thanks guru

[divyaashimix]

hey bhaggu GURU and SHUBHA...
you guyz change yr name to FUN N MASTI yaarrrrrr :D :D :D :D

[guru_sal]

hey gur ur welcum n subha n guru awsome wrk
thankz tukz

[guru_sal]

hey bhaggu GURU and SHUBHA...
you guyz change yr name to FUN N MASTI yaarrrrrr :D :D :D :D
thankz divu
and change kar hi le kay

[amit@bitspilani]

awesome.. guys guru u r a rockstar ..and shubha ..may be u dont know me..its AMIT here ... brilliant work....

[guru_sal]

awesome.. guys guru u r a rockstar ..and shubha ..may be u dont know me..its AMIT here ... brilliant work....
thankz a lot bro

[shubha63]

thanks a lot amit & divya

[divyaashimix]

thanks a lot amit & divya
hey netime.....
your welcum......

[guru_sal]

Sardar got into a bus on 1st April when conductor asked for ticket. He gave
Rs.10/- and took the ticket and said April fool. I have pass.


Sardar joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the computer.
Boss was happy and asked what you did till evening.
Sardar : Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright.



2 sardars were fixing a bomb in a car.
Sardar 1 : What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing.
sardar 2 : Dont worry, I have one more.



Sardar was busy removing a wheel from his auto. A man asks sardar why are
you removing a wheel from your auto.
sardar : Cant you read the board. Parking is only for 2 wheeler.


Sardar : What is the name of your car ?
Lady : I forgot the name, but is starts with "T".
Sardar : Oye Kamaal ki gaadi hai, Tea se start hoti hai. Hamaara gaadi
petrol se start hoti hai.

Boss : Where were you born ?
sardar : Punjab.
Boss : which part ?
sardar : Kya which part ? Whole body born in punjab.

How will you destroy a submarine full of sardars ?
Simple. Just knock the door and they will open it.

[guru_sal]

Santa Naal Banta



As the crowded elevator descended, Banta's wife, Preeto, became increasingly furious with Banta, who was delighted to be pressed against a gorgeous girl.
As the elevator stopped at the main floor, the girl suddenly whirled, slapped Banta, and said, "That will teach you to pinch!"
Bewildered, Banta was halfway to the parking lot with Preeto when he choked, "I... I... didn't pinch that girl."
"Of course you didn't," said Preeto, consolingly, "I did."

Santa walks into the front door of a bar. He is obviously drunk. He staggers up to the bar, seats himself on a stool, and with a belch, asks the bartender for a drink.
The bartender politely informs the man that it appears that he has already had plenty to drink--he could not be served additional liquor at this bar but could get a taxi called for him.
Santa is briefly surprised then softly scoffs, grumbles, climbs down off the bar stool, and staggers out the front door.
A few minutes later, Santa stumbles in the side door of the bar. He wobbles up to the bar and hollers for a drink. The bartender comes over, and still politely--but more firmly refuses service to the man due to his inebriation. Again, the bartender offers to call a taxi for him.
Santa looks at the bartender for a moment angrily, curses, and shows himself out the side door, all the while grumbling and shaking his head.
A few minutes later, Santa bursts in through the back door of the bar. He plops himself up on a bar stool, gathers his wits, and belligerently orders a drink.
The bartender comes over and emphatically reminds the man that he is clearly drunk, will be served no drinks, and either a taxi or the police will be called immediately.
Surprised Santa looks at the bartender and in hopeless anguish, cries "Man! How many bars do you work at?"

Santa bought a brand new Maruti and decided to drive down from Amritsar, where he lived, to Jalandhar to meet his friend. He reached there in a few hours. After spending a few days there, he decided to return, and called up his mother to expect him in the evening. But he did not reach in the evening, and not the next day either.
When he finally reached home on the third day, his distraught mother ran and asked him, "Arre Puttar, ki hoya ?"
Santa got out, obviously very tired from a long journey, and said, "Oy, ye Mrutti wale paagal ho gaye hain! Agge jaane waaste chaar gear banaae hain, aur pichche jaane waaste sirf ik ?" (These Maruti guys have gone crazy, they ve made four gears for going forward and just one for going back!)


One afternoon, a wealthy lawyer was riding in the back of his limousine when he saw Santa and Banta eating grass by the road side. He ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate.
"Why are you eating grass?" he asked Santa.
"We don`t have any money for food," Santa replied.
"Oh, come along with me then," instructed the lawyer.
"But, sir, I have a wife and three children!"
"Bring them along!" replied the lawyer.
He turned to Banta and said, "Come with us."
"But sir, I have a wife and four children!" Banta answered.
"Bring them as well!" answered the lawyer as he headed for his limo.
They all climbed into the car, which was no easy task, even for a car as large as the limo.
Once underway, Santa says, "Sir, you are too kind. Thank you for taking all of us with you."
The lawyer replied, "No problem, the grass at my home is almost a foot tall."


Banta wanted to determine if both his wife, Preeto and mistress were faithful to him. So he decided to send them on the same cruise, then later question each one on the other`s behavior.
When his wife, Preeto, returned, he asked her about the people on the trip in general, then casually asked her about the specific behavior of the passenger he knew to be his mistress.
"She slept with nearly every man on the ship," Preeeto reported.
Disheartened Banta then rendezvoused with his cheating mistress to ask her the same questions about his wife Preeto.
"She was a real lady," his mistress said.
"How so?" encouraged Banta asked.
"She came on board with her husband and never left his side."

[divyaashimix]

hey GURU....
kool work...:p :p

[guru_sal]

hey GURU....
kool work...:p :p
thankz divu

[shubha63]

nice job guru

[shubha63]

A sardar died of brain tumour.
All the other sardars started dancing.
One guy asked “what’s this?”

They said: atleast one of us had a brain……..oh balle balle…..

………………………………
in a bar 1 guy says 2 another “ I slept with ur mom last nite.”

The whole bar was waiting 4 the guy’s response.

He laughs & says,

“lets go home dad, u r drunk”

…………………………………..1Himesh ke love letter ka ladki ka reply:

Oooooooooo huzur
Bhad me gaya tera surur
Surat se tu hai khajur
Beedi ke factory ke majdur
Chal ho jaa mujhse dur
Saala langur.

[tukz]

hey guru n shubha nice wrk

[shubha63]

hey guru n shubha nice wrk
thanks tukz.

[guru_sal]

nice job guru
thankz a lot

[guru_sal]

A sardar died of brain tumour.
All the other sardars started dancing.
One guy asked “what’s this?”

They said: atleast one of us had a brain……..oh balle balle…..

………………………………
in a bar 1 guy says 2 another “ I slept with ur mom last nite.”

The whole bar was waiting 4 the guy’s response.

He laughs & says,

“lets go home dad, u r drunk”

…………………………………..1Himesh ke love letter ka ladki ka reply:

Oooooooooo huzur
Bhad me gaya tera surur
Surat se tu hai khajur
Beedi ke factory ke majdur
Chal ho jaa mujhse dur
Saala langur.
22222 cool

[shubha63]

22222 cool
thanks dude

[tukz]

thanks tukz.
ur mst welcum shubha

[guru_sal]

thanks dude
yr most welcum

[shubha63]

as this year draws to an end,
i want to thank the special people
who touched my life with their concern
and made my life more meaningful.

thank you everyone for your contribution to my life.


may god continue to give you abundant happiness in the new year.:)

[tukz]

as this year draws to an end,
i want to thank the special people
who touched my life with their concern
and made my life more meaningful.

thank you everyone for your contribution to my life.


may god continue to give you abundant happiness in the new year.:)
hey gud 1 shubha

[divyaashimix]

as this year draws to an end,
i want to thank the special people
who touched my life with their concern
and made my life more meaningful.

thank you everyone for your contribution to my life.


may god continue to give you abundant happiness in the new year.:)
hey Shubha...
thats so sweet of you!!!!!

[shubha63]

hey tukz n divya, i just luv u

[guru_sal]

as this year draws to an end,
i want to thank the special people
who touched my life with their concern
and made my life more meaningful.

thank you everyone for your contribution to my life.


may god continue to give you abundant happiness in the new year.:)
hey shubha 2 gud

[guru_sal]

If you�re a Bollywood fan you�ve surely heard most of these one-liners a million times!:

1) HERO:
Tere saamne teri maut khadi hai Kuttay!!
Tumhare liye meri jaan bhi haazir hai!
Mere paas meri maa ka ashirwad hai!
Apne Aaadmiyon se kaho ki bandookein phhek de!
Dunyaki koi takat hame juda nahi kar sakti!
Mere hotey huay tumhara koi baal bhi baaka nahin kar sakta!
Yeh meri maa keh Kangan hai!
Maa, mujhe Ashirwad de!
Khabardaar joe Usse haat bhee lagaya!
Tumne apni ma ka dudh piya hai to�
Maa main first class first pass ho gaya hu�
Arre, tum to mere bicchade huay bhai ho!

HEROINE :
Bhagwan ke liye mujhe chhod do!
Hato. Tum bade woh ho !
Naheen!
Mein tumhare bagair nahin reh sakti!
Maa ne tumhe ghar bulaya hai!
Main usse pyar karti hoon!
Humne pyar kiya hai koi gunah nahin!
Kuchh goonde mere pichhe pade hai!
Baar baar mera pichha kyon karte ho!
Koi Dekh Lega!
Maine tumhe kya samjha, aur tum kya nikley!
HERO�S SISTER:


Mein tumhare bachhe ki maa ban ne wali hoon! Mere bhaiya ko lambi umar dena, bhagwan! Mere bhai pe koi aanch na aye! Khabardar jo mujhe chhua bhi, main apni jaan dey doongi! Bhaiyya, tum mere liye ek pyaari si bhabhi kab laaonge! Main kissi ko muh dikhane layak nahi rahi! Bhagwaan ke liye, meri suhaag mat ujaado! Chhod do mujhe, bhagwaan ke liye chhod do!

VILLAIN:
Undoubtedly, the villain has the most fun. He nearly gets close to rape the heroine, beats the hero, kidnap his family in the climax. Sometimes he gets the chance to kill them too!

Tum sign karte ho ke nahi ? Itni achi cheez bhagwaan ke liye chod doon. Kabhi nahin! Ab Saare Hindustan par hamara raaz hoga!
Batao faarmoola kahan hay? Tumhari maa hamare kabze main hai! Kahan jaa rahi ho chhamak chhalon! In gori gori kalaiyon ko kaam karne ki kya zaroorat hai! Yahan teri izzat bachane koi nahi ayega! Yahan teri cheekh sunne walah koi nahin! Bula tere bhagwan ko� dekhta hoon kaun ata hai? Kis maai ke laal mein itni himmat hai jo mujhse takrayega? Gaddari ki ek hi sazaa hoti hai, maut! Uski koi kamzori hogi, koi maa ya behan?


VILLAIN�S SIDEKICK :


Boss, Maine tumhara namak khaya hain! Boss! Maal pakda gaya! Tumhe Boss ne bulaya hain! Ok Boss!
DOCTORS:


Mujh par bharosa rakhiye! I am sorry! Iska to bahot khoon bahey chooka hai. Phoren operation karna padega! Bhagwan ne chaha to sab thik hoga! Badhai ho, tum baap bannay waalay ho! Iski haalat bahot najook hai! Tumhe sakt aaram ki jaroorat hai! Jaldi se woh dawayee lao! Ab sabh kuch oopar waley ke haath mein hain! Ab main kuch bhi nahin kar sakta! Bacche ko to hum ney bacha liya par maa�
THE LAW:
Order� Order�
Kanoon Ko apney haath mein mat lo!
Kanoon jazbaat nahi, saboot dekhti hai!
Kanoon ko saboot chahiye!
Tazeerat-e-hind , dafa 302 ke tahat, mulzim ko maut ki saza sunai jaati hai!
Mulzim ko baa izzat bari kiya jata hai!
Milord�
HERO/ HEROINE�s FATHER :


Ghar mein do javaan betiyan hain! Agar toonay aisa kiya toh - mujhse burra koi nahin hogaaa! Ek baar iske haath pile kar doon, phir mein chain se mar sakta hoon! Is ghar ke darwaaze, tumhare liye hamesha ke liye band hein! Beti to paraya dhan hai! Mere jeeteji yeh shaadi nahin ho sakti! Main jald hi dahez ki sari rakam chuka doonga! Yeh aap kya kah rahen hai, bhai sahib! Ab hum kisi ko muh dikhane ke layak nahin rahe! Kya isi din ke liye tujhe paida kiya tha? Main kahta hoon, Door ho jaa meri nazron sey!
MOTHER:
Mera Raja beta!
Mera ashirwad sada tere saath hai!
Tujhe ek maa ki aah lagegi!
Mera beta aisa kabhi nahin kar sakta!
Mera beta teri maut bankar aayega, thakur!
Ek baar mujhe maa keh kar pukaro beta�
Mere bete ki raksha karna prabhu!
Kya apni maa ki baat nahi maanega?
Mera achha beta, jaldi se dudh peekar bada ho jaa!
Is budhi maa ka tumhare siwa aur kaun hai?
Mere Raja bete ko aaj mein apne haaton se khilaaongi!
Hey bhagwan, mere suhaag ki raksha karna!
Maine tere liye gajar ka halwa banaya hai!
Maine tumhe paal pos kar bada kiya�
Mar, Mar isse betay, isse ne tere Devata jaise pita ka khoon kiya!
MOTHER-IN-LAW :


Chudeil! Kide pade tere� Tere baap ke bheje huey iss sari ka too kya karegi. Chal, mujhe dey! Ey Chudail, ab kaha se mooh kala karke aayee hain? Aah Haa Haa, Maharani, waha baithey baithey kya kar rahi hain! Arri Kalmoohi, Kaha mar gayi!
Eh Kulta, tere baap ne ab tak dahej ki rakam nahin chukayi!
************ ********* *****

Some of the Inspiring Quotes which tell not to give up in life so you can learn something from these Quotes

1) Never expect things to happen..
struggle and make them happen.
never expect yourself to be given a good valuecreate a value of your own

2) If a drop of water falls in lake there is no identity.But if it falls on a leaf of lotus it shine like a pearl.so choose the best place where you would shine..

3) Falling down is not defeat...defeat is when your refuse to get up...

4) Ship is always safe at shore... but is is not built for it

5) When your successful your well wishers know who you are when you are unsuccessful you know who your well wishers are

6) It is great confidence in a friend to tell him your faults; greater to tell him/her

7) "To the world you might be one person,
but to one person you just might be the world

8) "Even the word 'IMPOSSIBLE' says 'I M POSSIBLE' "

9) Effort is important, but knowing where to make an effort in your life makes all the difference.

[amit@bitspilani]

HEY GURU AWESOME DUDE...

AND SHUBHA...U JUST ROCK IN THIS THREAD....FANTASTIC ...

[amit@bitspilani]

Comparison Between Teacher & Student

• When we are in class, we are “students”.
• When they are in class, they are “teacher”.

• When we overwrite our own writings, it’s “overwriting”.
• When they overwrite, it’s “correction”.

• When we gather to discuss, it is “gossip”.
• When they gather to discuss, it’s “meeting”.

• When we are found in the library, it’s “bunking”.
• When they are found in the library, it’s “research work”.

• When we stand outside classroom, we are “punished”.
• When they stand outside classroom, they are “relaxing”.

• When we do something wrong, we are “idiots”.
• When they do something wrong, they are “humans”.

• If we don’t do our work on time, we are “lazy”.
• If they don’t do their work on time, they are “busy”.

• When we think in class, we are “daydreamers”.
• When they think in class, they are “philosophers

[amit@bitspilani]

. A FOOLish man tells a woman to STOP talking, but a WISE man tells
her that she looks extremely BEAUTIFUL when her LIPS are CLOSED.

2. One GOOD way to REDUCE Alcohol consumption:
Before Marriage - Drink whenever you are SAD
After Marriage - Drink whenever you are HAPPY

3. Three FASTEST means of Communication:
1. Tele-Phone
2. Tele-Vision
3. Tell to Woman
Need still FASTER - Tell her NOT to tell ANY ONE.

4. Love your friends not their sisters.
Love your sisters not their friends.

5. A man got 2 wishes from GOD.
He asked for the Best wine and Best Woman.
Next moment, he had the Best Wine and Mother Teresa next to him.
Moral : BE SPECIFIC

6. What is a BEST and WORST news you can hear at the SAME time?
It is when your Girl Friend says YOU are the BEST KISSER among all your
Friends.

7. Let us be generous like this:
Four Ants are moving through a forest.
They see an ELEPHANT coming towards them.
Ant 1 says: we should KILL him.
Ant 2 says: No, Let us break his Leg alone.
Ant 3 says : No, we will just throw him away from our path.
Ant 4 says : No, we will LEAVE him
Because he is ALONE and we are FOUR.

8. If you do NOT have a Girl Friend - You are missing SOME thing in
your life.
If you HAVE a Girl Friend - You are missing EVERY thing in your life.

9. Question: When do you CONGRATULATE someone for their MISTAKE.
Answer: On their MARRIAGE.

10. When your LIFE is in DARKNESS, PRAY GOD and ask him to free you
from Darkness.
Even after you pray, if U R still in Darkness - Please PAY the
ELECTRICITY BILL.

11. Why Government do NOT allow a Man to MARRY 2 Women.
Because as per Constitution, you cannot be PUNISHED TWICE for the same
Mistake.

[divyaashimix]

hey AMIT.....
kool work man......

[shubha63]

hey amit. the jokes are just tooooooooooo good

[tukz]

. A FOOLish man tells a woman to STOP talking, but a WISE man tells
her that she looks extremely BEAUTIFUL when her LIPS are CLOSED.

2. One GOOD way to REDUCE Alcohol consumption:
Before Marriage - Drink whenever you are SAD
After Marriage - Drink whenever you are HAPPY

3. Three FASTEST means of Communication:
1. Tele-Phone
2. Tele-Vision
3. Tell to Woman
Need still FASTER - Tell her NOT to tell ANY ONE.

4. Love your friends not their sisters.
Love your sisters not their friends.

5. A man got 2 wishes from GOD.
He asked for the Best wine and Best Woman.
Next moment, he had the Best Wine and Mother Teresa next to him.
Moral : BE SPECIFIC

6. What is a BEST and WORST news you can hear at the SAME time?
It is when your Girl Friend says YOU are the BEST KISSER among all your
Friends.

7. Let us be generous like this:
Four Ants are moving through a forest.
They see an ELEPHANT coming towards them.
Ant 1 says: we should KILL him.
Ant 2 says: No, Let us break his Leg alone.
Ant 3 says : No, we will just throw him away from our path.
Ant 4 says : No, we will LEAVE him
Because he is ALONE and we are FOUR.

8. If you do NOT have a Girl Friend - You are missing SOME thing in
your life.
If you HAVE a Girl Friend - You are missing EVERY thing in your life.

9. Question: When do you CONGRATULATE someone for their MISTAKE.
Answer: On their MARRIAGE.

10. When your LIFE is in DARKNESS, PRAY GOD and ask him to free you
from Darkness.
Even after you pray, if U R still in Darkness - Please PAY the
ELECTRICITY BILL.

11. Why Government do NOT allow a Man to MARRY 2 Women.
Because as per Constitution, you cannot be PUNISHED TWICE for the same
Mistake.

hey amit too cool re

[tukz]

hey tukz n divya, i just luv u
ur welcum.....luv u tooooooooooo

[tukz]

If you�re a Bollywood fan you�ve surely heard most of these one-liners a million times!:

1) HERO:
Tere saamne teri maut khadi hai Kuttay!!
Tumhare liye meri jaan bhi haazir hai!
Mere paas meri maa ka ashirwad hai!
Apne Aaadmiyon se kaho ki bandookein phhek de!
Dunyaki koi takat hame juda nahi kar sakti!
Mere hotey huay tumhara koi baal bhi baaka nahin kar sakta!
Yeh meri maa keh Kangan hai!
Maa, mujhe Ashirwad de!
Khabardaar joe Usse haat bhee lagaya!
Tumne apni ma ka dudh piya hai to�
Maa main first class first pass ho gaya hu�
Arre, tum to mere bicchade huay bhai ho!

HEROINE :
Bhagwan ke liye mujhe chhod do!
Hato. Tum bade woh ho !
Naheen!
Mein tumhare bagair nahin reh sakti!
Maa ne tumhe ghar bulaya hai!
Main usse pyar karti hoon!
Humne pyar kiya hai koi gunah nahin!
Kuchh goonde mere pichhe pade hai!
Baar baar mera pichha kyon karte ho!
Koi Dekh Lega!
Maine tumhe kya samjha, aur tum kya nikley!
HERO�S SISTER:


Mein tumhare bachhe ki maa ban ne wali hoon! Mere bhaiya ko lambi umar dena, bhagwan! Mere bhai pe koi aanch na aye! Khabardar jo mujhe chhua bhi, main apni jaan dey doongi! Bhaiyya, tum mere liye ek pyaari si bhabhi kab laaonge! Main kissi ko muh dikhane layak nahi rahi! Bhagwaan ke liye, meri suhaag mat ujaado! Chhod do mujhe, bhagwaan ke liye chhod do!

VILLAIN:
Undoubtedly, the villain has the most fun. He nearly gets close to rape the heroine, beats the hero, kidnap his family in the climax. Sometimes he gets the chance to kill them too!

Tum sign karte ho ke nahi ? Itni achi cheez bhagwaan ke liye chod doon. Kabhi nahin! Ab Saare Hindustan par hamara raaz hoga!
Batao faarmoola kahan hay? Tumhari maa hamare kabze main hai! Kahan jaa rahi ho chhamak chhalon! In gori gori kalaiyon ko kaam karne ki kya zaroorat hai! Yahan teri izzat bachane koi nahi ayega! Yahan teri cheekh sunne walah koi nahin! Bula tere bhagwan ko� dekhta hoon kaun ata hai? Kis maai ke laal mein itni himmat hai jo mujhse takrayega? Gaddari ki ek hi sazaa hoti hai, maut! Uski koi kamzori hogi, koi maa ya behan?


VILLAIN�S SIDEKICK :


Boss, Maine tumhara namak khaya hain! Boss! Maal pakda gaya! Tumhe Boss ne bulaya hain! Ok Boss!
DOCTORS:


Mujh par bharosa rakhiye! I am sorry! Iska to bahot khoon bahey chooka hai. Phoren operation karna padega! Bhagwan ne chaha to sab thik hoga! Badhai ho, tum baap bannay waalay ho! Iski haalat bahot najook hai! Tumhe sakt aaram ki jaroorat hai! Jaldi se woh dawayee lao! Ab sabh kuch oopar waley ke haath mein hain! Ab main kuch bhi nahin kar sakta! Bacche ko to hum ney bacha liya par maa�
THE LAW:
Order� Order�
Kanoon Ko apney haath mein mat lo!
Kanoon jazbaat nahi, saboot dekhti hai!
Kanoon ko saboot chahiye!
Tazeerat-e-hind , dafa 302 ke tahat, mulzim ko maut ki saza sunai jaati hai!
Mulzim ko baa izzat bari kiya jata hai!
Milord�
HERO/ HEROINE�s FATHER :


Ghar mein do javaan betiyan hain! Agar toonay aisa kiya toh - mujhse burra koi nahin hogaaa! Ek baar iske haath pile kar doon, phir mein chain se mar sakta hoon! Is ghar ke darwaaze, tumhare liye hamesha ke liye band hein! Beti to paraya dhan hai! Mere jeeteji yeh shaadi nahin ho sakti! Main jald hi dahez ki sari rakam chuka doonga! Yeh aap kya kah rahen hai, bhai sahib! Ab hum kisi ko muh dikhane ke layak nahin rahe! Kya isi din ke liye tujhe paida kiya tha? Main kahta hoon, Door ho jaa meri nazron sey!
MOTHER:
Mera Raja beta!
Mera ashirwad sada tere saath hai!
Tujhe ek maa ki aah lagegi!
Mera beta aisa kabhi nahin kar sakta!
Mera beta teri maut bankar aayega, thakur!
Ek baar mujhe maa keh kar pukaro beta�
Mere bete ki raksha karna prabhu!
Kya apni maa ki baat nahi maanega?
Mera achha beta, jaldi se dudh peekar bada ho jaa!
Is budhi maa ka tumhare siwa aur kaun hai?
Mere Raja bete ko aaj mein apne haaton se khilaaongi!
Hey bhagwan, mere suhaag ki raksha karna!
Maine tere liye gajar ka halwa banaya hai!
Maine tumhe paal pos kar bada kiya�
Mar, Mar isse betay, isse ne tere Devata jaise pita ka khoon kiya!
MOTHER-IN-LAW :


Chudeil! Kide pade tere� Tere baap ke bheje huey iss sari ka too kya karegi. Chal, mujhe dey! Ey Chudail, ab kaha se mooh kala karke aayee hain? Aah Haa Haa, Maharani, waha baithey baithey kya kar rahi hain! Arri Kalmoohi, Kaha mar gayi!
Eh Kulta, tere baap ne ab tak dahej ki rakam nahin chukayi!
************ ********* *****

Some of the Inspiring Quotes which tell not to give up in life so you can learn something from these Quotes

1) Never expect things to happen..
struggle and make them happen.
never expect yourself to be given a good valuecreate a value of your own

2) If a drop of water falls in lake there is no identity.But if it falls on a leaf of lotus it shine like a pearl.so choose the best place where you would shine..

3) Falling down is not defeat...defeat is when your refuse to get up...

4) Ship is always safe at shore... but is is not built for it

5) When your successful your well wishers know who you are when you are unsuccessful you know who your well wishers are

6) It is great confidence in a friend to tell him your faults; greater to tell him/her

7) "To the world you might be one person,
but to one person you just might be the world

8) "Even the word 'IMPOSSIBLE' says 'I M POSSIBLE' "

9) Effort is important, but knowing where to make an effort in your life makes all the difference.


kul 1 guru

[guru_sal]

kul 1 guru
thankz a lot tukz
and everyone

[guru_sal]

nice ones bro

[tukz]

thankz a lot tukz
and everyone
ur mst wlecum guru

[tukz]

>American told sardar : Hamare desh me 90% shaadi e-mail se hoti hai.
>Sardar : Kya bath hai. Hamari desh me 100% female se hoti hai.
>
>
>Sardar : What is the name of your car ?
>Lady : I forgot the name, but is starts with "T".
>Sardar : Oye Kamaal ki gaadi hai, Tea se start hoti hai. Hamaara gaadi
>petrol se start hoti hai.
>
>
>Interviewer : When is your birthday.
>Sardar : 13th Oct.
>Interviewer : which year ?
>sardar : Oye Ullu ke patte : Every year.
>
>
>2 sardar were fixing a bomb in a car.
>Sardar 1 : What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing.
>sardar 2 : Dont worry, I have one more bomb.
>
>

>On a romantic day sardar's girlfriend asks him," Darling on our engagement
>day will you give me a ring?"
>Sardar : Ya sure, from landline or mobile.
>
>
>Sardar joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the computer.
>Boss was happy and asked what you did till evening.
>Sardar : Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright

[shubha63]

>American told sardar : Hamare desh me 90% shaadi e-mail se hoti hai.
>Sardar : Kya bath hai. Hamari desh me 100% female se hoti hai.
>
>
>Sardar : What is the name of your car ?
>Lady : I forgot the name, but is starts with "T".
>Sardar : Oye Kamaal ki gaadi hai, Tea se start hoti hai. Hamaara gaadi
>petrol se start hoti hai.
>
>
>Interviewer : When is your birthday.
>Sardar : 13th Oct.
>Interviewer : which year ?
>sardar : Oye Ullu ke patte : Every year.
>
>
>2 sardar were fixing a bomb in a car.
>Sardar 1 : What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing.
>sardar 2 : Dont worry, I have one more bomb.
>
>

>On a romantic day sardar's girlfriend asks him," Darling on our engagement
>day will you give me a ring?"
>Sardar : Ya sure, from landline or mobile.
>
>
>Sardar joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the computer.
>Boss was happy and asked what you did till evening.
>Sardar : Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright
ha ha. good job gal

[tukz]

ha ha. good job gal
thnx a lot shuhba

[shubha63]

there is a clock in heaven.
everytime u lie its hand moves.
harishchandra's never moved.
dharmaraya's moved once

& god is using urs as a fan.

____________________________


ghar walo ka kehna hai ki
"DIL LAGAKAR PADHAI KARO"
unhe koi kaise samjaye ki

ek baar DIL LAGANE KE BAAD padhai kahan hoti hai.

_________________________________

HEIGHT OF LANGUAGE MISUSE:

Student seeing monkey out of the window.
& the professor scolds him:
"why are you seeing the monkey outside, when i am in the class"
___________________________________


lady: my husband went to buy potatoes 5 days ago, he hasn't come back yet!

sardar(inspector): why don't u cook something else.

[guru_sal]

>American told sardar : Hamare desh me 90% shaadi e-mail se hoti hai.
>Sardar : Kya bath hai. Hamari desh me 100% female se hoti hai.
>
>
>Sardar : What is the name of your car ?
>Lady : I forgot the name, but is starts with "T".
>Sardar : Oye Kamaal ki gaadi hai, Tea se start hoti hai. Hamaara gaadi
>petrol se start hoti hai.
>
>
>Interviewer : When is your birthday.
>Sardar : 13th Oct.
>Interviewer : which year ?
>sardar : Oye Ullu ke patte : Every year.
>
>
>2 sardar were fixing a bomb in a car.
>Sardar 1 : What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing.
>sardar 2 : Dont worry, I have one more bomb.
>
>

>On a romantic day sardar's girlfriend asks him," Darling on our engagement
>day will you give me a ring?"
>Sardar : Ya sure, from landline or mobile.
>
>
>Sardar joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the computer.
>Boss was happy and asked what you did till evening.
>Sardar : Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright
kool one tukz

[tukz]

there is a clock in heaven.
everytime u lie its hand moves.
harishchandra's never moved.
dharmaraya's moved once

& god is using urs as a fan.

____________________________


ghar walo ka kehna hai ki
"DIL LAGAKAR PADHAI KARO"
unhe koi kaise samjaye ki

ek baar DIL LAGANE KE BAAD padhai kahan hoti hai.

_________________________________

HEIGHT OF LANGUAGE MISUSE:

Student seeing monkey out of the window.
& the professor scolds him:
"why are you seeing the monkey outside, when i am in the class"
___________________________________


lady: my husband went to buy potatoes 5 days ago, he hasn't come back yet!

sardar(inspector): why don't u cook something else.
gud 1 shubha

[tukz]

kool one tukz
thnx a lot

[shubha63]

gud 1 shubha
thanks tukz

[guru_sal]

there is a clock in heaven.
everytime u lie its hand moves.
harishchandra's never moved.
dharmaraya's moved once

& god is using urs as a fan.

____________________________


ghar walo ka kehna hai ki
"DIL LAGAKAR PADHAI KARO"
unhe koi kaise samjaye ki

ek baar DIL LAGANE KE BAAD padhai kahan hoti hai.

_________________________________

HEIGHT OF LANGUAGE MISUSE:

Student seeing monkey out of the window.
& the professor scolds him:
"why are you seeing the monkey outside, when i am in the class"
___________________________________


lady: my husband went to buy potatoes 5 days ago, he hasn't come back yet!

sardar(inspector): why don't u cook something else.
cool....................

[shubha63]

10x guru...............

[tukz]

thanks tukz
ur mst welcum

[kool gurl]

can i kno if guru is in the forum

[guru_sal]

can i kno if guru is in the forum
ya i'm dere

[guru_sal]

IN Prison = you spend the majority of your time in an 8X10 cell.
AT WORK = you spend most of your time in a 6X8 cubicle.







IN PRISON =you get three meals a day (free).

AT WORK =.you only get a break for one meal and you have to pay for it yourself.











IN PRISON =you get time off for good behavior.

AT WORK = you get rewarded for good behavior with more WORK.




IN PRISON = a guard locks and unlocks the doors for you.
AT WORK = .you must carry around a security card and unlock open all the doors yourself.







IN PRISON =you can watch TV and play games.

AT WORK = you get fired for watching TV and playing games.






IN PRISON =they allow your family and friends to visit.

AT WORK = you can not even speak to your family and friends.







IN PRISON =all expenses are paid by taxpayers with no work at all.


AT WORK = You get to pay all the expenses to go to work and then they deduct taxes from your salary to pay for the prisoners.





Humm?

Which Sounds Better? So commit a crime & go to prison

[divyaashimix]

hey GURU....
kwel work friend!!!! :) :)

[tukz]

IN Prison = you spend the majority of your time in an 8X10 cell.
AT WORK = you spend most of your time in a 6X8 cubicle.







IN PRISON =you get three meals a day (free).

AT WORK =.you only get a break for one meal and you have to pay for it yourself.











IN PRISON =you get time off for good behavior.

AT WORK = you get rewarded for good behavior with more WORK.




IN PRISON = a guard locks and unlocks the doors for you.
AT WORK = .you must carry around a security card and unlock open all the doors yourself.







IN PRISON =you can watch TV and play games.

AT WORK = you get fired for watching TV and playing games.






IN PRISON =they allow your family and friends to visit.

AT WORK = you can not even speak to your family and friends.







IN PRISON =all expenses are paid by taxpayers with no work at all.


AT WORK = You get to pay all the expenses to go to work and then they deduct taxes from your salary to pay for the prisoners.





Humm?

Which Sounds Better? So commit a crime & go to prison



nice wwrk guru

[guru_sal]

thankz a lot both of u

[kool gurl]

hey guru how r u

[tukz]

thankz a lot both of u
ur mst welcum

[shubha63]

hey guru. it was cooooooooool

[shubha63]

girl: do u have any sentimental love cards?
shopkeeper: how about this card. it says...."to the only boy i ever loved"
girl: great. i want 5 of them.

_______________________________-


BEAT THIS ALL U PJ FREAKS:

a gangster marries his gun & immediately people start worshipping him.........


.............


why............?


think...............


coz he becomes GUNPATI!

_________________________________


it takes 15 trees to produce the amount of paper that we use in 1 exam.
join us in saving trees.
"SAY NO TO EXAMS"
tell it to all good students.

_____________________________


before exams students sing a song-
" kuch to hua hai, kuch ho raha hai"
after seeing the question paper-
"sab kuch alag hai, sab kuch naya hai"

[guru_sal]

hey guru. it was cooooooooool
thankz a lot

[guru_sal]

girl: do u have any sentimental love cards?
shopkeeper: how about this card. it says...."to the only boy i ever loved"
girl: great. i want 5 of them.

_______________________________-


BEAT THIS ALL U PJ FREAKS:

a gangster marries his gun & immediately people start worshipping him.........


.............


why............?


think...............


coz he becomes GUNPATI!

_________________________________


it takes 15 trees to produce the amount of paper that we use in 1 exam.
join us in saving trees.
"SAY NO TO EXAMS"
tell it to all good students.

_____________________________


before exams students sing a song-
" kuch to hua hai, kuch ho raha hai"
after seeing the question paper-
"sab kuch alag hai, sab kuch naya hai"
hey shubha gr8 1

[guru_sal]

hey guru how r u
hey shweta i'm fine
wat about u ?

[divyaashimix]

hey SHUBHA....
gr8 work!!!!!!:D :D

[guru_sal]

hey aaj pehla din hai jab mere paas jokes nahi hai
post karne ke liye

[tukz]

girl: do u have any sentimental love cards?
shopkeeper: how about this card. it says...."to the only boy i ever loved"
girl: great. i want 5 of them.

_______________________________-


BEAT THIS ALL U PJ FREAKS:

a gangster marries his gun & immediately people start worshipping him.........


.............


why............?


think...............


coz he becomes GUNPATI!

_________________________________


it takes 15 trees to produce the amount of paper that we use in 1 exam.
join us in saving trees.
"SAY NO TO EXAMS"
tell it to all good students.

_____________________________


before exams students sing a song-
" kuch to hua hai, kuch ho raha hai"
after seeing the question paper-
"sab kuch alag hai, sab kuch naya hai"
hey shubha gr8 wrk.............

[shubha63]

thanks tukz, guru & divya

[guru_sal]

thanks tukz, guru & divya
yr most welcum

[guru_sal]

16 Signs that you Like Someone


SIXTEEN:

When you're on the phone with them late at night and they hang up, you still miss them even when it was just two minutes ago.


FIFTEEN:

You read their Texts and Ims Over and over again.



FOURTEEN:

You walk really slow when you're with them.



THIRTEEN:

You feel shy whenever they're around.



ELEVEN:

When you think about them, your heart beats faster but slower at the same time.



TEN:

You smile when you hear their voice.



NINE:

When you look at them, you can't see the other people around you, you just see him/her.



EIGHT:

You start listening to slow songs while thinking about them.



SEVEN:

They're all you think about.



SIX:

You get high just from their scent.



FIVE:

You relize you're always smiling when you're looking at them.



FOUR:

You would do anything for them, just to see them.



THREE:

While reading this, there was one person on your mind this whole time.



TWO:

You were so busy thinking about that person, you didnt notice number twelve was missing



ONE:

You just scrolled up to check & are now silently laughing at yourself.

[shubha63]

koooool work guru

[guru_sal]

koooool work guru
thankza lot
even mujhe bhi bahut achcha laga ye

[guru_sal]

koooool work guru
thankza lot
even mujhe bhi bahut achcha laga ye

[tukz]

16 Signs that you Like Someone


SIXTEEN:

When you're on the phone with them late at night and they hang up, you still miss them even when it was just two minutes ago.


FIFTEEN:

You read their Texts and Ims Over and over again.



FOURTEEN:

You walk really slow when you're with them.



THIRTEEN:

You feel shy whenever they're around.



ELEVEN:

When you think about them, your heart beats faster but slower at the same time.



TEN:

You smile when you hear their voice.



NINE:

When you look at them, you can't see the other people around you, you just see him/her.



EIGHT:

You start listening to slow songs while thinking about them.



SEVEN:

They're all you think about.



SIX:

You get high just from their scent.



FIVE:

You relize you're always smiling when you're looking at them.



FOUR:

You would do anything for them, just to see them.



THREE:

While reading this, there was one person on your mind this whole time.



TWO:

You were so busy thinking about that person, you didnt notice number twelve was missing



ONE:

You just scrolled up to check & are now silently laughing at yourself.

hey guru nice 1....luv it

[guru_sal]

hey guru nice 1....luv it
thankz a lot

[nimi]

[COLOR="DarkOrange"]THIS IS WHEN SOME ONE LOVE SOME ONE AND
WHAT THEY THINK ABOUT THR WORLD AT THAT TIME


A special world for you and me
A special bond one cannot see
It wraps us up in its cocoon
And holds us tightly in its womb.

Its fingers spread like spun gold
Gently nestling us to the fold
Like silken thread it holds us fast
Bonds like this are meant to last.

And though at times a thread may break
A new one forms in its wake
To bind us closer and keep us strong
In a special world, where we belong.THIS IS WHAT WE DREAM ABOUT OUR LOVE ONE AND WHAT THEY THINK ABOUT
US AND WHAT HAPPEN WE WE ARE NOT THERE.

A flower grows from beneath a blanket
Of fine and purest white
It reaches toward the sun for warmth,
For heat and for the light

My love for you grows stronger still,
Despite the surrounding cold
My heart is yours, bartered gone
For yours has it been sold

Its petals shine from morning dew
Its stem grows stiff and strong
It stands strong through the freezing cold
It stands the winter long

I long for you, for your soft touch
I miss the way you smile
The longer that we stay apart
The longer every mile

The flower stretches through the snow
It reaches toward the sun
And now without you the color is gone
The flower's petals, dun

But as we talk, and as we learn
The flower comes back to life
The snow now melts and goes away
As you take away my strife

Spring is here and growth abounds
As you and I are one
We are together, we are in love
The snow for now is done

I see the future, in dreams I have
Of our life, long and true
I see the times where all I need
Are comforting words from you

I see the times when winter comes
As winter tends to do
But we still love, and we still live
And I do still love you

And so we live, with children ours
And a life of much to see
With love we live, to live we love
Happy together are we

I see the flower, older now,
But still strong with fresh new leaves
I see it growing, tall and strong
Reaching to the eaves

We are now old, as years have passed
But old together are we
And strong our love still today
As strong as i

[divyaashimix]

[COLOR="DarkOrange"]THIS IS WHEN SOME ONE LOVE SOME ONE AND
WHAT THEY THINK ABOUT THR WORLD AT THAT TIME


A special world for you and me
A special bond one cannot see
It wraps us up in its cocoon
And holds us tightly in its womb.

Its fingers spread like spun gold
Gently nestling us to the fold
Like silken thread it holds us fast
Bonds like this are meant to last.

And though at times a thread may break
A new one forms in its wake
To bind us closer and keep us strong
In a special world, where we belong.THIS IS WHAT WE DREAM ABOUT OUR LOVE ONE AND WHAT THEY THINK ABOUT
US AND WHAT HAPPEN WE WE ARE NOT THERE.

A flower grows from beneath a blanket
Of fine and purest white
It reaches toward the sun for warmth,
For heat and for the light

My love for you grows stronger still,
Despite the surrounding cold
My heart is yours, bartered gone
For yours has it been sold

Its petals shine from morning dew
Its stem grows stiff and strong
It stands strong through the freezing cold
It stands the winter long

I long for you, for your soft touch
I miss the way you smile
The longer that we stay apart
The longer every mile

The flower stretches through the snow
It reaches toward the sun
And now without you the color is gone
The flower's petals, dun

But as we talk, and as we learn
The flower comes back to life
The snow now melts and goes away
As you take away my strife

Spring is here and growth abounds
As you and I are one
We are together, we are in love
The snow for now is done

I see the future, in dreams I have
Of our life, long and true
I see the times where all I need
Are comforting words from you

I see the times when winter comes
As winter tends to do
But we still love, and we still live
And I do still love you

And so we live, with children ours
And a life of much to see
With love we live, to live we love
Happy together are we

I see the flower, older now,
But still strong with fresh new leaves
I see it growing, tall and strong
Reaching to the eaves

We are now old, as years have passed
But old together are we
And strong our love still today
As strong as i
hey NIMI...that was dam kool re....

[tukz]

thankz a lot
welcum n nimi kul wrk

[kool gurl]

hi tukz. whats up

[guru_sal]

[COLOR="DarkOrange"]THIS IS WHEN SOME ONE LOVE SOME ONE AND
WHAT THEY THINK ABOUT THR WORLD AT THAT TIME


A special world for you and me
A special bond one cannot see
It wraps us up in its cocoon
And holds us tightly in its womb.

Its fingers spread like spun gold
Gently nestling us to the fold
Like silken thread it holds us fast
Bonds like this are meant to last.

And though at times a thread may break
A new one forms in its wake
To bind us closer and keep us strong
In a special world, where we belong.THIS IS WHAT WE DREAM ABOUT OUR LOVE ONE AND WHAT THEY THINK ABOUT
US AND WHAT HAPPEN WE WE ARE NOT THERE.

A flower grows from beneath a blanket
Of fine and purest white
It reaches toward the sun for warmth,
For heat and for the light

My love for you grows stronger still,
Despite the surrounding cold
My heart is yours, bartered gone
For yours has it been sold

Its petals shine from morning dew
Its stem grows stiff and strong
It stands strong through the freezing cold
It stands the winter long

I long for you, for your soft touch
I miss the way you smile
The longer that we stay apart
The longer every mile

The flower stretches through the snow
It reaches toward the sun
And now without you the color is gone
The flower's petals, dun

But as we talk, and as we learn
The flower comes back to life
The snow now melts and goes away
As you take away my strife

Spring is here and growth abounds
As you and I are one
We are together, we are in love
The snow for now is done

I see the future, in dreams I have
Of our life, long and true
I see the times where all I need
Are comforting words from you

I see the times when winter comes
As winter tends to do
But we still love, and we still live
And I do still love you

And so we live, with children ours
And a life of much to see
With love we live, to live we love
Happy together are we

I see the flower, older now,
But still strong with fresh new leaves
I see it growing, tall and strong
Reaching to the eaves

We are now old, as years have passed
But old together are we
And strong our love still today
As strong as i
hey nimi gud work
its 2 gud